


Aiming in the Dark

by neatmonster



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Adapted Dialogue, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Anti-Lori Grimes, Canon-Typical Violence, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Medical Inaccuracies, Mentions of Shane/Lori, Military Background, Military Inaccuracies, Miscarriage, New Scenes, Original Character(s), Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Multiple, POV Original Character, POV Shane Walsh, Romance, Shameless Smut, Shane Walsh Lives, Smut, Weapons, Zombie Apocalypse, a bit anti-Rick, a few comic references, adapted scenes, burn scars
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-20
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2020-09-19 04:35:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 20
Words: 82,971
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20325190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neatmonster/pseuds/neatmonster
Summary: A very resourceful woman ends up alone after the outbreak. On her way to Atlanta she meets the group and joins them in their search for Sophia. She goes unnoticed for most of them, except for Shane who quickly sees her as an asset to have and maybe something else.





	1. Alone

**Author's Note:**

> A few things to know before reading:
> 
> It follows the point of view of an original character (I hope you like her) and the first chapter is dedicated to show a little of her journey. I'm not describing her physically so you can picture whoever you like.
> 
> Around chapter 9 we can also see Shane's pov.
> 
> This story skips to the second season of TWD and that scene with Shane and Lori at the CDC doesn't happen in this universe, he just took a shower and went to sleep. The end. 
> 
> Also, in my brief research about military bases I didn't find any official protocols when it comes to emergency situations such as pandemics (they're probably classified as they should be), so everything is out of my imagination mixed with things I've taken from both, The walking dead and Fear the walking dead.

Leaving war behind, she arrived at Fort Benning three days after the outbreak.

Still jet lagged, she didn’t understand the blocked entrances at the base. Lines of cars with civilians looking for a safe place.

Designating training grounds, empty houses and part of the terrain to accommodate all these people was far from easy, but everyone worked hard on it from minute one.

She had her own team that grew from four to twenty, including recruits, veterans and people who just wanted to help.

The population was divided into zones. Everyday, random health checks were conducted to keep everybody safe. If anybody were to show any symptoms, no matter the cause, they were immediately moved to their designated medical area.

Soon enough, the unknown disease quickly started to spread everywhere and it didn’t take long to make its way into one of the most protected places.

Ten days later, she was assigned to the medical bay in Zone 8. The task was easy enough, keep people safe, assist when they can, report any incidents to their superiors.

Second day in medical, a man died during surgery and everything changed.

Laying on a slab waiting for his family to say goodbye, the cold body started to wiggle in waves, first his hand, then a slight jolt in the leg.

When the doctor went to check the rarity of it, his eyes opened wide, rising up to bite on his shoulder and tearing his flesh apart. He whimpered and fought hard to pull back from his reach.

In position by the door, she drew a quick breath putting a bullet on the dead man’s head.

The doctor panicked and tried to escape but he was restrained by two soldiers who took him to the containment area.

Some people were adamant on shooting him right away, others disagreed saying it was inhumane to kill someone who was still clearly alive.

She didn’t know where to stand.

The skimp information from the government was confusing at most. No one really had any concrete answers.

While the debate was heated, the doctor ultimately died on his own, only to wake up again in a cold skin craving flesh.

That was the first of many to come, she was ordered to kill the doctor. What was left of him at least.

She never hesitated when it came to kill or be killed but this was someone she knew, a few tears welled up in her eyes as she did it.

The day after, it hit her. The first man who died on surgery wasn’t bit.

Translating her concerns to her superiors, who were alarmingly calm about it, raised her worries.

When another two civilians died, they attacked a large group of people and a major block that had to be quarantined.

Broadcasts stopped, government channels were shut down as the last order from the military chain of command was declared.

Operation Cobalt.

Military personnel were told to pack lightly and were given assurance of their safety. Specific steps needed to be followed, and soldiers were to avoid arousing suspicion in the civilian population in the safe zones.

While both, infected and healthy people were quarantined. They would also send units to hospitals and jails.

Her orders were clear. She and her team were in charge of rounding civilians in her area and seal the door behind, all this while maintaining the facade that everything was going to be alright.

She’s never disobeyed an order but it didn’t sit right with her.

There wasn’t much time, her instincts kicked in and it all went speed light. She ignited a fire in one of the buildings, shot open like a madman at locked doors and warned as many as she could on her way.

Her team didn’t listen to her, some tried to stop her, which made her question her own integrity and leadership skills.

Raging chaos, while some of them fled quickly, others didn’t have much luck as they would gang on personnel for explanations. That led to a major conflict of shooting everyone at sight.

Not really thinking it through, it only served her as a diversion to escape the base.

She grabbed a duffle bag and filled it with as many weapons, food and medicine as she could. Then hopped on a motorcycle that she rode leaving behind what was her “home” for the past four years.

**

Stealing military issue, going against orders, igniting a fire, turning people against her own fellow soldiers... a selfish action that she'd never made in normal circumstances.

Driving aimlessly with her head spinning, she’d experience a panic attack.

Stopping on the side of the road, she left the helmet that was suffocating her fall to the ground.

_Okay, okay,_ she mumbled as her legs gave up standing to drop her ass to the ground.

With labored breath, she felt her heart racing, as tears sprang from her eyes.

Helpless, with no place to go, she crawled to the tree line to rest her back against the trunk of a tree, she sank her elbows on her knees and buried her head on her forearms.

She could count on one hand the times she’s been scared, this was one of them.

She would reach for her gun at any sign of movement or sound. Mostly coming from the wind hitting the trees.

With the first rays of sunlight, her head jerked awake realizing she fell asleep.

It’d only been a few hours when she saw a large body of smoke coming from the direction she ran away from. She knew what it was, the base was being bombed. Her heart broke at the uncertainty of how many people got out on time and how the world was going to settle after this.

Back on her bike, she rode by a small motel. Pulling up to the side of the parking lot, she observed the abandoned place.

She’s driven by other places but none of them seemed safe. This was no different but she needed a place to regroup and think about what to do next.

Single story with twelve rooms, a small lounge room next to the kitchen and an office. A little outdated and for the look of it, with only two cars on the lot, it didn’t seem like a top traveling spot.

A few “guests” were wandering the parking lot. It wasn’t like war, even thought they would reach for you if you’d get too close they didn’t have the willpower or the weapons to consciously attack.

Easily, she took care of them and went inside to check room by room, _Psycho_ she thought when she was inspecting the office. It was dusty and dark, it had only one window and the stuffed animals on one of the shelves reminded her of that. She saw it with her brothers when she was way too young and had nightmares for weeks.

Closing the door behind her she would stay away from it.

The two vending machines in the lounge were cleaned of all the snacks and drinks by her hand, the kitchen had some frozen food that she put in inventory with the other she had. She wasn’t short on food so far, she took a few MRE’s from the base that were still sealed.

When all the rooms were clear and locked, she picked one from herself.

By sheer luck the place still had power and running water, she took advantage of the luxury and when the day was done, she took a good long shower.

It made her nervous not having a plan but with no more than will to survive, she relied on the things she got in her favor. Her skills and training were crucial, but not as much as the hope of seeing her family once again. _One day_, that was her last thought before closing her eyes at night.

She secured a perimeter and planned an escape route if anything were to happen. Her things were never unpacked, all was ready to grab at any moment and bounce.

The first few weeks she crashed there she felt lonely and couldn’t help but cry before sleeping.

She was not used to it. Crying.

Like a soldier she was, she kept up with her usual routine. At first hour she would exercise, shower and check the perimeter, eat, sleep and do the same all over again.

In the woods, she set a few snares for rabbits that were cooked or freeze for later if any would get caught. The snacks from the machines and MRE’s were rationed, only to open when other food was lacking.

There weren’t many guests, only the occasional roamer. She quickly learned what would set them off. Noise, light and smell, but she wasn’t sure of the latter.

Soon she would start to save bullets by using knives if she had the chance.

Avoiding the office for the most part, when boredom came to visit she entered the room almost grimacing. She checked every cabinet and drawer and found a radio, bourbon and some books.

After getting a little buzzed from the whiskey, she wrote her name on the guest book leaving a funny remark to it. 

_O. Brennan - from day thirteen of hell to never ending shitty month._

The books weren’t really amenable, a few about birds, an old phone book and a couple of magazines.

Playing with the radio, she could only hear static.

It was the first night she slept outside her room. Settling in a comfy armchair in the office, she locked her arms around her knees and tilted her head back on the cushiony backrest.

Her eyes and the white noise from the radio did the rest.

**

CDC, She heard it in a dream or the radio, she wasn’t sure.

When she woke up that’s all that was in her head, The Center for Disease Control and Prevention. If anyone would have any answers they would be there.

With a map in her hand she would mark her route up to Atlanta. She wasn’t far, three hours at most.

She picked her stuff up and climbed on the motorcycle, venturing to a different place.


	2. Crossing

Driving through rural Georgia, the world was adamant about not giving her a damn break.

Within two hours on the road, the bike starts releasing a black smoke and she has to ditch it in the middle of nowhere.

Head up high, dressed up in her fatigues with a duffel bag crossing over a shoulder, a rifle strapped on the other, a holstered gun and ka-bar hooked on her belt, she continues the rest of the way on foot, at least until she can find another vehicle.

The sun is hitting hard and she drapes her jacket over her head for cover.

Growls. Sudden loud growls and dragging feet coming from the crossing ahead catch her attention.

The infected, they didn’t have a name, nor did the diseased. It baffled her how little everyone knew of this life changing moment.

_Roamers_, she would call them. A mass of them coming her way, roughly over a hundred for what she can see, maybe more.

Stopping for a moment as she assesses the situation, she slips quickly back into her jacket and props the rifle on her shoulder.

As skilled as she likes to think she is there’s no way in hell she can’t take that many.

Hopping over the guardrail she adventures into the woods almost in stealth mode, as she keeps a clear line from them, minding her steps and eyes all over the place.

When the growls are barely heard she finds a stream.

Bending down with her boots stepping on a large rock, she fills up her canteen and two water bottles. Then she pours some over the back of her neck.

Taking a break, she sits by the bank of the stream to eat some berries she found nearby. She is chugging down some water when she quickly reaches for her handgun at the sound of crushed twigs behind her, leaving the bottle to drop at her feet.

Rising up fast as she turns around, aiming at her threat. She expected a couple of roamers but these were three living ones.

In front of her, three men armed to their teeth, ready to shoot just like her. Or something worse, she could only imagine the amount of assholes thriving in the new circumstances.

There was one with a crossbow, another with a colt python and a third one with a rifle flanking her to the side.

Keeping her hands steady, shifting on her feet she follows the guy with the rifle.

"I know what you're doing asshole," she barks with steel eyes fixed on the man that stares back just as cold.

"Hey- hey," says the one with the gun in a calm voice, "put it down, we're just looking for a little girl."

"Yeah? And you're gonna keep looking cause this little girl ain't going nowhere."

“Look at me- hey," as he calls for her, she moves her head a little, keeping an eye on her flank, to see the other man holstering his gun, "See? We don't wanna harm you,” then he holds his hands up yielding.

"What about your friends?" She glances back at the asshole that remains in the same position.

He signals the man with the crossbow, "put it down, Daryl" and he does, then he looks at his other friend standing his ground, "Now you, Shane."

When all of them have laid down their weapons she still feels uncomfortable at her surroundings and keeps pointing hers almost on reflex.

It’s her first contact in weeks with live ones, she’s grown used to the company of the dead, so she keeps her handgun up as they were about to bite her.

The guy who seems to be the leader tries to put her mind at ease. He reaches into his pocket and takes out a badge to show to her, "we're telling the truth."

"Are you cops?"

“Just us,” he gestures at Shane, “I'm Rick, we lost a twelve year old and we're looking for her.”

Hesitating, she holsters her weapon as well, “I haven't seen anyone, just a mass of roamers,” then she wanders a few feet to pick her stuff up.

“Roamers? We call ‘em walkers,” says Daryl looking for a trail in the ground in between bushes.

“That's some heavy gear you have there,” Shane says glancing at her bag as he rests his weapon on his shoulder, “you army or something?”

“Yeah,” gearing up again she starts walking passing by his side to go back to the road.

“Brennan, right?” Rick points at the name tape on her jacket and she nods.

It’s weird to hear her own name, last name in this case, nobody has referred to her in weeks.

"Why don't you help us? We need more eyes out here," Rick asks, stopping her for a beat.

“I can’t, I have a date. CDC, those assholes own us some answers.”

“Good luck with that,” Shane snarks.

Hearing the mocking of his tone she asks, mocking his tone, what he means by that.

That's when they tell her the CDC blew up, they were there when it happened and the only scientist holding the fort didn't have as many answers as they'd have liked.

Processing the news she stands still as her face goes blank.

“Guys, we don't have all day. Let's go,” Daryl hollers.

As they go their way following a trail, Shane turns around, “ Are you coming or not?”

Her feet involuntarily start moving to follow the men she just met.

Lagging behind them, she stares at the ground focused on her every step rather than the task. She hears them talk without paying attention to what they're saying.

Brennan snaps out of it at the sight of Shane’s boots walking backwards before her eyes.

Lifting her head up she sees him gazing at her, trying to figure her out.

“Sergeant Brennan, right?” he asks, motioning his head at her insignia.

“Yeah,” she sighs, “-not anymore, I suppose.”

“How come you’re alone?”

She shakes her head.

That’s one of the questions she has asked herself every day since.

There’s little commotion ahead when Daryl kills a walker.

Crouching by the body, he pulls out a knife and stabs it on the belly to open it up.

Ricked grimaces at the smell of it and Brennan takes a few steps back holding her breath.

“Ugh, that’s disgusting man,” Shane says, covering his nose with his forearm.

“Just checking what he got for lunch-” with his bare hand goes into the stomach to pick up little bones from animals, he presumes.

The sun was setting and Shane wonders how long they were gonna keep at it as they won’t be seeing much in the dark.

“I’ll stay,” Brennan says rifling through her bag to take her night vision headgear, “where did you last see her?” then she adjusts it over her forehead.

“Shit, you have more for us there?”

“No, but-” going through it again, she finds an attachment she has for her rifle with night vision as well, “here.”

Holding it up, Shane takes it first and fixes it on his rifle.

Glaring at her most impressed, he aims the other way, putting his eye on the scope, “Could have used these at the station.”

Rick vaguely snorts at the thought, "What ever happened in King County that called for night vision?"

“Don’t know,” he shrugs, “something mighta.”

**

The trail is lost but they keep going, predicting where she could've gone.

Once the sun is completely gone, Daryl and Rick go back to check on the group as Brennan and Shane keep searching.

Coming across a walker hanging on a tree next to a small cabin, they leave it there- to avoid drawing any more to the sound of a bullet.

While she checks the place, Shane stands watch by the door.

There isn’t much at the cabin, just a single bed, a sink, a desk and a chair. With the help of a flashlight she looks thoroughly around the small space.

"Was she carrying anything or wearing something that could fall off?" She points the light at him.

“Only a doll,” he responds, poking his head through the door frame.

“No jewelry?”

He shrugged not really remembering if she did.

“I thought you were a cop,” she states casually with no mock in her tone.

“Didn't think a twelve year old was to be a menace. Ask me about anyone else- I could tell you about Daryl or his dumbass of a brother.”

“Nothing-” leaving the cabin, he follows close to her left.

Focused on the task, they keep their voices low.

“So how did you lose a little girl?”

Brennan listened closely how he told her that a horde caught them off guard and she ran with Rick behind her. He had to leave her hidden to distract two walkers but by the time he returned she was gone.

“Stop,” she extends her arm to Shane, pushing him back a little as she points to the ground on his feet.

“Bear trap?”

She passes the flashlight to Shane, who leans down, observing the device tainted with blood and a small amount pooled in the ground. He brushes some of it with his finger from the ground and brings it close to his nose.

Shane exhales wincing, “walker.”

“What now? Do you think she came this far?”

As he stands up worried, “We should get back- get some shuteye before searching in the morning.”

“Are you sure? She could still be out here.”

He tilts his head for a beat and turns around to walk away.

“What are you not saying?” she rushes behind him.

“Look at how things are, if she’s been here- do you really think she got any chance?” his speech fastens unnerved.

“I don’t know this girl- but she might have.”

“Exactly, you don’t know,” he directs at her in a tone harsher than he intended.

_Okay,_ she replies softly to herself as she watches him stomping his way out of the woods.

They get back to the road about three hours before sunrise.

Passing by an RV she hears someone crying, there’s people sitting in cars resting and Daryl on watch.

Settling in one of the abandoned cars, she tosses her stuff to the passenger seat and sits on the driver’s, propping a knee on the wheel, she runs a hand through her hair before tilting back on the headrest as she closes her eyes.

A light tap on the window makes her rise to see Shane leaning on the side of the vehicle so she rolls the window down.

“You okay here?” he asks, glancing quickly at her while keeping his eyes on the road.

“Yeah,” she sighs tired.

“Didn’t mean to snap like that.”

Shaking her head as she’d have already forgotten, “that’s okay, officer.”

“Are you staying?”

Her shoulders vaguely rise, “for now.”

Brennan goes to sleep as Shane paces up and down the road a couple times before doing the same.


	3. Trail

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little boring to be honest. If you stick a little longer it gets more interesting around chapter five.

She decided to stay for a bit longer even though she had made up her mind on going to check on her family in North Carolina at some point.

Pacing along the guardrail, the first to approach her in the morning is the last person she saw before closing her eyes, Shane. He walks with her as introductions are made to the group, that is currently gathering to go search for Carol’s daughter.

As Rick is trying to come up with a plan, everyone is suddenly privy to a discussion happening between Andrea and Dale, who decided to take her gun.

Everyone is anxious to go to the woods, especially Carol who hasn’t slept during the night.

“Hey, you think it is a good idea having everyone out there?” she asks Shane.

“Got any better ideas?” he questions back leaning on the guardrail.

“We could go faster in separate groups,” and she furrows looking to her side to see them gearing up.

“None of these people have field experience. If it were up to me- I wouldn’t bring them at all.”

Looking back to him, “Then, why are you?”

He tilts his head pointing to Rick, “You should talk to the leader right there.”

As she turns her head, Rick is calling for everybody to follow him. Brennan picks her bag and takes it to Dale for safekeeping before leaving.

Then Rick takes the lead through the woods with everybody behind him and Daryl, as Dale and T-Dog stay on the road.

Taking a different direction from the night before, they come across a tent, when Carol calls for Sophia there is no response. Daryl goes inside and finds a decaying body covered in worms.

Brennan recognizes one of the places they checked a few hours before, she diverts to it. It was the path to the cabin, after the bear trap, they didn’t check any further.

Strolling in a different direction alone for the most part of three or four minutes, then she hears a trail of light steps behind her.

Turning around she sees Glenn following. “Hey.”

“Hey,” she says back, scanning the area.

“You know, we’re going the other way?”

She takes a quick glance at him, “I can look on my own, we need to cover more terrain.”

Slowly, she stops to check everything on the ground, especially around trees and bushes. Footsteps, traps, blood, any indication that someone was around there.

Shane, who saw Glenn breaking from the group decided to follow, “Hey, what are you two doing here?” he scolds them in a low voice as he walks towards them.

“She’s onto something-” says Glenn, closely following her every step.

“Come on, let’s go back- we already check here”

She dismisses it and keeps going her own way.

“The group needs us,” insisting annoyed, rushing up to her, “Are you always this stubborn?”

“They have Rick and Daryl, they’ll be fine. ‘Sides we’ve barely seen walkers around here.”

He shakes his head pressing his lips tight, “The trap- have you thought why it was there in the first place? someone is hunting those things. It was set right after- whoever is out there-”

“Then, they have nothing against us, right?” as she keeps thoroughly focused on her task uninterrupted, she replies, keeping her voice to a minimum, “what if she gets caught in one, have you thought about that?”

Huffing almost too loud, they both stay with her. As they spread out a bit, they pass the cabin, and moments after they see the same trap from the night before.

Shane was onto something there, she thinks glancing at it. The night before the blood was still fresh and the jaws were properly set. Now it remains the same but the blood has dried.

There’s a few footprints after that and they follow them.

In their way, she decides to tell them about the base, “I heard some of you this morning- you’re going to Fort Benning?”

Glenn nods to Shane, “Shane’s idea. Do you know someone there?”

“Don’t,” she warns them, “it fell down too.”

“Yeah, no shit, Sergeant- knew the moment I asked yesterday,” Shane scoffs side eyeing her.

When the trail of footprints has vanished, they find a path that promptly leads them to a house.

They find three more traps set along a perimeter that takes them to a house.

Holding onto their weapons, Brennan knocks on the door as Shane and Glenn take a peek through the windows. The house seems to be empty. She hits harder on the door to draw any walkers out.

It’s a two story home with a basement, they explore both floors calling for Sophia, so far no clue that she was there.

The basement is locked but as they get closer the sounds get louder.

Growls and snarling noises behind the wooden door. Glenn hovers an ear and squints an eye peeking through a small crack. He can make out 5 or 6 as one of them is blocking the view.

“We need to check- if she’s-” he doesn’t dare to say the words but they both nod.

“Okay, we line up on top of the stairs, as they come up we shoot one at a time- first Shane, then me, then you-” she orders looking at Glenn.

“Who’s going to open the door?” Glenn wonders.

“You, kid,” says Shane, “-you’re fast, climb back up as soon as you open.”

Brennan and Shane take their positions, “I hate you guys,” he mutters before climbing down to open.

Doing as she said, Glenn opens the door, quickly jolting back up to stand next to Brennan. It takes them a few seconds to figure it out but as soon as the first walker is out, Shane puts a bullet in his head, next is up to Brennan and a third one comes up, that Glenn shoots and misses the first time.

“I got it,” Glenn fires again, making the roamer fall on top of the others.

They clean a couple more and go inside the basement, luckily none of them was Sophia.

In the middle of the room they find two half-eaten pigs bleeding on the floor.

“Who would do that?” Glenn circles around the dead animals.

Shane takes a closer look over the bodies and observes three of them with jaw marks on their legs.

“See,” he directs at Brennan, “-someone is trapping them.”

“Why are they feeding them though?”

“Who fucking knows,” and he hits the doorframe, - come on, let’s catch with the others.”

In a fast paced stride they walk back to the original path. Half-way through the sounds of bells echo through the trees. Stopping for a beat, they look at each other and pinpoint the noise, soon they’re walking towards it.

As they arrive to a cemetery next to a church, they see the group afar entering the building.

When they’re close enough, they hear Rick’s voice yelling the little girl’s name.

Glenn enters the church as he is suddenly bombarded with questions of their whereabouts.

Brennan and Shane are waiting outside when the bell rings once more.

She rounds the corner and finds the switch box connected to a speaker and disconnects it.

“It was on a timer,” she informs the group, then she takes a few steps back and sits on the nice shadow on one of the sides of the church as the rest disperses through the grounds.

Just seconds after, she’s witness to a conversation happening around the corner.

“So, you’re just going to disappear? What about Carl? Are you gonna tell Rick?” Lori demands to know, irritated.

Shane scoffs loudly, “I love Carl- just trying to do the right thing here, and Rick-” he pauses, “he’d only get in the way.”

“Is that easy for you, huh? Just pick up and leave?”

“Didn’t say it was easy- I’m the one with the short end here- I’m the one who-” he chokes up a little and hangs his head to sort out his thoughts, “- it doesn’t matter. You got your family back- go be with them.”

When Lori steps back inside the church, Shane glances away and sees Brennan looking at him. He shallows taking a firm grip on his weapon, unsure of what this new person might have heard, he automatically stares daggers at her as a tight crease forms on his brow.

“Hey, Brennan! Walsh!” Daryl shouts for them.

Following his voice they find him by a clearing talking with Rick.

“I'm gonna search this area a bit longer,” says Rick “-and Daryl will take the others back, the three of us could stay here a bit longer," he looks at both and they agree.

The rest of the group goes back to the road, with the exception of them and Carl, who decided to stay as well to look for his friend.

**

Walking in close distance as they wander the land, Carl spots the knife hanging on Brennan’s belt, “Cool knife, can I see it?”

“Not now, buddy,” she smiles at the boy.

“Have you killed many walkers with it?”

Her eyes scan the area, “some.”

“He found an _arsenal_ yesterday,” Shane adds, “now he’s all about knives.”

Passing a fallen tree, they find a walker stuck under it. As Rick takes a hold of his gun she stops him and stabs it in the head.

Shane keeps an eye on her, still waiting for answers about the military base that he didn’t get to ask before, “Are you gonna tell us what happened?”

“Where?”

“Fort Benning.”

She nods but she doesn’t respond.

A few feet ahead, Rick spots a deer and gestures to them to see it.

Shane readies his weapon to shoot at it but Rick puts a hand on his arm to lower it, they all watch Carl smiling at the beautiful animal.

In a matter of seconds a bullet passing through the deer hits the boy that now lays on the ground.

Rushing through the field, with Carl in Rick's arms, all of them follow the guy who shot accidentally when he was hunting the buck.

He takes them to farm. A woman sitting on the porch yells for her dad at their arrival and everyone moves quickly to help the little boy.

Settling Carl on a bed, Hershel, the owner of the farm, quickly assesses the damage in the boy’s shoulder.

Rick and Shane have to hold him from moving, as Hershel takes the first fragment out, the boy screams in pain and immediately passes out.

The man in charge informs Rick there’s a few more and he needs the proper equipment.

Otis, who is in shock for hurting the boy, knows where to get what they need. A FEMA shelter overrun with walkers, he informs them.

Pacing around Ricks about to get going and Shane has to stop him from leaving Carl’s side.

“Shhh, shhh” he calms Rick, holding his face, “you need to stay with him, man. We’ll go-” and he looks to Brennan, who agrees with a quick nod.

Otis, knowing exactly what Hershel needs for the surgery, pipes up to the mission as well.

“My wife- she needs to know,” Rick cries.

They tell Hershel’s oldest daughter, Maggie, where to find her and she goes find her on a horse.

As they get ready to leave as well, they climb into a blue pickup truck, with Otis on the wheel, Shane sits in the cabin with him and Brennan hops in the box bed.

She taps with a knuckle on the rear glass, giving them the okay to drive and Otis starts the truck that takes them to the school.


	4. Nightshift

It’s almost dark when they arrive at the school that was used for shelter after the outbreak, now is filled with walkers.

Leaning down by the side of a police car, Shane opens the trunk to pick some flares.

“How are we doing this?” Otis inquires whispering.

“She’s gonna lure them away and we go in-” and he gives the flares to Brennan.

“Is that your plan?” She questions as low as possible, “look at the building, there’s gotta be more inside. How are you-”

“I can take care of them,” he mouths pulling out his flashlight, "-I’ll signal if we need help.”

She huffs shaking her head at his earnest confidence, “be careful.”

He nods, “you too.”

Using the cars as a shield, she puts some distance to the side towards the fence's corner, first she lights the flares carefully and throws them closer to the fence to draw the ones inside away from the gate, with her gun ready she prepares to shoot as they get closer.

Firing a few times as more get drawn to the noise, she takes a few steps back, fully aware of her surroundings she makes sure none approach from behind. As the gate clears she sees them finally crossing the fence.

In the midst of the turmoil, she hears shots coming from inside. Hopping on top of a school bus, she searches around for them, or Shane’s signal but there’s nothing so far, so she climbs down.

She tries to keep the entrance unobstructed for them to come back. Stabbing some of her way to it, shooting at others, and hitting loudly in one car to keep them coming to her. Losing count she has at least 20 bodies in the outside, and a bunch more behind the fence.

She hears another shot around the other side of the building.

“Shit.”

Running towards it, bending the corner she sees Shane vaguely running with a limp and two walkers close behind, about to jump on him.

Coming to his aid, she fires at the one that was closer to him, Shane recoils almost certain he was about to get bit, then she lays another bullet in the other.

“No more ammo,” he pants when she finally gets to him.

Handing him her gun, she takes one of the bags he’s carrying and he leans an arm around her shoulders. She grabs his waist to help him run faster.

Brennan looks back to see a cluster of walkers in the distance focused on something else, or someone else.

“Otis?”

Stalling her feet for a moment, he nudges her, “come on, we have to go,” he shouts.

"What about-" she glances over one more time to see the man completely tackled by roamers.

More walkers keep coming as one get on their way Shane points and kills it, "Let's go!" he urges.

**

Behind the wheel she drives away from the school, glancing at Shane from the corner of her eye, “what happened?”

He checks on his ankle,"I think it’s broken- I- I had to jump out of a window- he- Otis was covering me-" he stammers pale faced, drenched in sweat, "we had to go in, they drove us into a corner and- told me to go."

“That last shot? That was your weapon- you did that?”

He winces taking his boot off and doesn’t answer.

“Shane?” she insists.

His eyes squeeze shut as a hand drags along his face, then his head turns to stare through the window, he swallows his answer with tears welling up.

He doesn't talk for the rest of the ride, when she pulls up in front of the house she sees something on the side of his head.

Her hand reaches for it and he flinches, “What are you doing?”

“You have- um, a balding spot,” she points above his ear.

When they see everyone coming out of the house, he quickly fixes some of his curls covering the spot and glances at her clenching his jaw, “you can't tell them, you hear me?”

“Shane- I don’t know what happened but-”

“Save it for later,” he snarls, climbing out of the car.

Maggie and Hershel take the bags with the medical equipment, noticing how their friend didn't come back, they agree to not tell Otis’ wife until after the surgery.

“We were cornered, man” Shane starts rumbling, “-he passed me his bag and she- she was outside drawing them from us, but- they were too many, Rick- shit- I couldn’t-”

Rick pulls Shane in a tight hug in front of the car, under Lori's eyes who throws a thank you nod with her hand on her chest from the porch.

“Thank you,” says Rick and he looks to Brennan, “both of you.”

They all go back inside to gather in the living room as they wait for the surgery to be over, but Brennan snatches Shane’s arm before he can enter to throw directly at his face, “don’t pull me into your lies.”

“You didn’t see shit,” he bites.

In a firm position she shakes her head, “I know what I saw- what I heard- that was you, you had one bullet right?”

“Shut it right now- I did what I had to, it was him or Carl-” he grunts utterly annoyed as he lunges a little to push her away from the door.

Anchoring herself to the floor from being pushed, as he gets extremely close, she takes a deep breath and tries to internalize what he must be feeling, her being there a few times on the other side of the trigger.

“Listen- I understand why you did it-” in a more calmed tone she hovers a hand over his shoulder for him to stop moving “-I heard you this morning, you love that little boy like it was yours, right? I get it- but you can’t drag me into what you’re doing right now- you need to stop it and deal with it. Denying it to everybody and to yourself- nothing good can’t come out of that.”

He starts pacing around listening to her words, trying to let them sink in the unsettling rambling of his thoughts.

As his leg keeps hurting he sits on the steps, “shit, you’ve been here, what- over a day and you think you have everyone figure it out.”

Sighing without answer, she crouches down in front of him and starts checking his ankle.

Lifting the hem of his pants she carefully removes the sock.

"You a doctor too?" he scowls.

"No, but I can tell the difference between broken and not broken," pressing her fingers softly from the base of his foot up to his sheen, he slightly jolts when she grazes the ankle joint.

“Just a sprain, you can check with the doctor later.”

She sits on her heels, in a calm voice, "what are you gonna do?"

Dragging both his hands down his face, with tired circles under his eyes, he scoffs,"Christ, you’re fucking annoying."

"And you're an asshole- we all have our things," she states quickly.

"I’ll figure it out, okay? Could you back off until then?” His voice is raspy and weary, and his expression burdened by what he did even if he can put it into words right now.

Sorting out her thoughts, she glares at him, " I’ll try."

**

With Carl out of danger everyone can finally breathe for a minute before going back to worry about Sophia.

After breaking the news to Otis' wife, Hershel checks on Shane's ankle. Conforming it was a sprain that he needs to watch out for in the next few days.

Maggie calls for them and gives them some fresh clothes to change into.

While she changes in Maggie's room into some of her clothes, a pair of jeans and a green t-shirt, Shane changes in the bathroom.

When she’s about to come out, someone knocks on the door. She opens it to a shirtless Shane lazily resting against the wall.

“Everything okay?”

“Need your help with something,” he says low, showing her the clippers on his hand.

Pressing her lips together she agrees and goes into the bathroom with him.

He sits on a short stool, as she combs his hair with her fingers. Closing his eyes at the feeling of them through his scalp, he closes his eyes and lets out a sight.

“Be careful,” he says hoarse when he snaps out of the daze.

Brennan picks up the scissors to get rid of some of the length of his curls first, “relax, I’ve used these before.”

Cutting mindfully his thick hair, she curls a strand at time between her fingers tossing the remains to the sink. When she’s done with the scissors, she uses the clippers to shape the chunky hairdo she just gave him into a nice buzz cut.

As a final touch, she takes a towel and soothes it over his head to get rid of the little fuzzy hairs wandering around his beautifully shaped head and shoulders. She glances down at his face to catch his eyes drowning in pain for what happened.

“Thank you,” he mumbles while reaching for her wrist.

Shutting his eyes, he shifts on his shoulders with his head falling down as she reaches to grip at his face, but he pulls her arm a little and buries his head in the crook of her elbow.

She cradles his face in one arm and soothes the other hand up and down his nape.

Shuddering under her hold, his arms move up to curl around her waist, pulling her even closer as his head presses now against her stomach he can feel her deep breaths, as he tightens his hold.

She has to hold back a few tears, fully understanding how he’s feeling, she squeezes tenderly on his bare skin as reassurance.


	5. Glock

Maggie brings Brennan a mug with coffee at dawn.

She’s spent most of the night sitting on the porch with her keeping watch. She closed her eyes a few times but didn’t get much sleep after the night at the school

Hershel has allowed them to stay while Carl recovers and they search for Sophia.

Glenn guides to the farm everyone who was still at the road, bringing the vehicles and all their stuff, the leave behind some food and a message for the little girl written on a windshield.

Some of them start to set camp on the Greene property after Otis’ funeral, as the rest gather around the truck to mark and discuss the search grids on a map.

When they’re doing so, Hershel notes most of them are carrying and immediately approaches the group to demand not to do so when they’re at the farm, causing some looks and concerns between them, especially Shane who warns them how reckless that is and refuses to do so.

“All due respect, that’s crazy, man- what happens the day you get a wandering crowd in here and we get caught but nothing more than a couple of knives?”

“We’ve managed so far without turning into an armed camp, there are fences to stop them,” Hershel remarks.

Rick agrees with Hershel and looks at Shane, who unwillingly lays his weapon tilting his head in disapproval under his blue cap.

Then, Rick looks at Brennan to ask her to do the same. Leveling with Shane, who stares at her wowed of how she carries herself, she says no.

“I’m sorry, but I’ve not come this far without it-” she frowns, “I’ll help on the search but I can stay anywhere else.”

“No need to do that- look around, this place is safe-” Rick tries to convince her, “-I believe that your skills don’t rely on your gun only, am I wrong?”

Scoffing she takes a glance around the sun bathed fields just to indulge him, then she stares at Shane, who tilts his head vaguely shrugging. Ultimately she surrenders her weapons as well while holding onto her blade.

Most of the group are either not acquainted with weapons yet, or too injured to go out.

Others have their own task, like Glenn who is going on a run with Maggie to get medical supplies in town.

It’s up to Daryl and Brennan to go out, both of them being capable on their own, each taking a zone.

Before leaving, she checks the ammo, and takes back the rifle and handgun she was asked to put down minutes ago. Shane follows a few feet behind, slowly limping as his ankle is still hurting.

He hollers for her to stop and she waits for him to catch up by the dirt road.

“You okay on your own?”

Brennan almost snorts at his question, “why wouldn’t I?”

“Just checking, you’re not gonna leave are you?”

“Would you even mind?” her eyes squint as the sun hits her face and places a hand over her forehead to cover her eyes.

“Guess I would,” he admits, “we could use you here, not just for searching-,” and he shifts on his feet nudging his cap up to look at her eyes.

“Even after calling you out like that?”

And he looks away for a second, “Pfff- I wanted to kick you out when you did- but then, you helped me, why?”

She takes a moment to come up with an answer, “I don’t know- I guess I- I’ve done things I regret too, you know?” she shares, “you did what you could, given the circumstances, it was a pretty fucked up situation that required an army kinda solution.”

“Did you ever have to-” and he doesn’t even have to finish the sentence cause she understands and nods at him, and he continues questioning her for some sort of reassurance, “how do you live with that?”

“Don’t forget what happened- or try to justify it with a bullshit version in your head- just honor what came out of it, Carl is alive because of him and so are you.”

“I-I don’t know how I’m gonna do that- but I’ll try” he nods fixing his cap.

Then she’s off on her own. He watches as she crosses the field to disappear behind the tree line.

**

Brennan searches for a good part of the day, returning late in the afternoon she have dinner with the rest and gracefully sneaks into the bathroom to take a quick shower, if there’s something she misses from the motel are the showers, she never had that luxury of doing so at any time she wanted, and after three days since the last one, she much needed one.

It doesn’t come with an issue for her, cause she has spent countless nights sleeping on the ground with nothing more than a sleeping bag, but when night comes, she finds herself without a place to rest.

The house is for the Greenes and the Grimes that are currently occupying one of the bedrooms with Carl.

Everyone else has tents, she could only carry so much when she left and didn’t bother to take hers.

When she walks out, only a few of them are already sleeping. Andrea, Shane, T-Dog and Glenn are sitting around in folding chairs, as Dale keeps watch on top of the RV.

She goes to the blue pick-up and improvises a resting place on the truck bed with a blanket on the surface that Maggie lent her. Then she rolls a few shirts together to make a pillow.

Laying on her back she stares at the sky before closing her eyes, but sleep doesn’t seem to find her easily. After a few minutes, a soft rattle on the side of the vehicle startles her.  
Reaching for a small glock that she had hidden consciously from the others, she extends her arm pointing at the threat.

"Easy, just me,” Shane holds his hands up grinning.

She hides the piece again under the blanket and lays back down shutting her eyes. And suddenly the awkwardness of their previous conversations is gone as they get used to each other.

“What the hell are you doing here?” he can’t help but laugh at the place of her choosing.

“Sleeping- tryin'.”

“What if I was a walker?” as he props his forearms on the side of the truck.

“Then you wouldn’t be talking right now,” she jokes.

“You know there’s plenty of space in the tents, right?”

“I didn’t wanna impose,” she opens an eye to glance at him, "are you gonna rat on me to the gun police?"

“You’re something else, you know that?” he chuckles remarking, “-and I am the police.”

“God, you must be thinking I'm a fraud- after giving you shit about lying," a hand drags along her face as she yawns, then she scratches her neck.

"I think you've been alone far too long and it's finally getting to you," he pokes her on the shoulder to get her attention, "hey, go to the tents- mosquitos are gonna eat ya up here."

Brennan sits down, facing him she crosses her legs with elbows on her knees, "how did you know that I was alone?"

He shrugs, "Cause you followed three strangers without question- they way you didn’t want to give up your guns- and just know you were just about to shoot me, need more reasons?"

“You got me,” she smiles tiresome.

“How long?”

"Since the beginning."

"How so?” he asks in a different tone this time “-you told me the base was no more but what happened?"

Letting out a long sight, Brennan tells him about everything that happened the first couple of weeks after the outbreak, everything that she did, how she didn’t follow orders, started a fire and even if she warned some people, how selfish of hers it was to not even look back to make sure they were safe. Then continues with the rest, how she hid alone in a motel for weeks until she ended up here.

Shane gets now part of what went down when he went to the hospital for Rick and shares that with her, with no accusations or judgments, he’s certain that she was just surviving like the rest of them.

“There’s something more-” says Brennan in a very low voice, ““I- I saw something. I’m not sure what it was yet- but I had a bad feeling about it,” talking about the man she saw die with not apparent bites or scratches. “- I think we’re all infected.”

“What do you mean?” he scowls.

“A man died, back in there- he wasn’t bit or anything but he became one of them-_those things._ ”

Shane wonders if Jenner, at the CDC, knew something about it. He doesn’t ask more questions, mostly cause she still seems confused by it and he doesn’t completely get it right now.

Hopping off the truck Shane helps her carry her stuff to his tent, she doesn’t hesitate on occupying half the space but he insists after all. He has a large gray tent with a cot, a side folding table, a lamp and a cluster of things lying on the other side that she pushed away to make room for hers.

Sitting on the cot, he hands her a sleeping bag that she sprawls on her side, “If you’re not comfortable there- you can take the cot, I’m gonna be on watch later.”

“I- I kinda prefer the ground,” then she drags her bag to take something out, “for your troubles-” and she gives him a bag of chips from her snack stash.

And he scoffs, taking it, “You sure you okay here? I can always switch with Andrea-”

“Oh, please, I have two brothers,” she interrupts him, gesturing as it was not trouble at all, “-nothing that I haven’t seen before.”

“Okay,” he nods as she lays on her back, nudging her boots off, “you’re not gonna snore are you?” she wonders amused.

“Maybe?” quirking up a smile, he extends his arm to turn off the light, then he leans back on the cot to get some rest before going on watch.


	6. Five

Twisting her wrist to look at the time she realized that she had lost her watch, without recalling when was the last time she saw it, or when she stopped caring about time.

Her hair covers half her vision, she brushes it back and turns around to see him curled up on the cot in front of her, scrunching his nose with the same serious pout underneath she’s seen in the past three nights.

Quietly, she dresses up in her combat uniform without waking him up. She leaves the jacket behind and ties her hair in a bun. She doesn’t carry at all the gun she hid, she makes sure it is well tucked in one of the pockets and places a bunch of other stuff on top.

Walking out, the first people to spot her are Glenn and Maggie, who are talking and snickering coming from the chicken coop with a basket of eggs. Maggie leans on his shoulder and playfully pinches his arm.

“Morning.”

“Morning, Sergeant,” Glenn responds cheerfully before realizing she was just coming out of Shane’s tent, “-wait- did you and-?”

His insinuation catches her completely off guard. Not that it hasn’t been in her mind, cause now and then she has found herself thinking about it those few times she’s been on her own.

“No, he just let me crash for a few nights- that’s all.”

“Right, _crashing_” Glenn chuckles unconvinced, “we are making breakfast, come sit with us- we barely see you.”

“Didn’t you two meet yesterday?” she quips as they go their merry happy way.

The warmness of their invitation makes her smile and she agrees.

She goes for a twenty minute run around the farm. Bathed in sweat after finishing, she returns to the tent and changes her t-shirt very quietly, trying not to wake up Shane.

With her back on him, she doesn't see him opening his eyes.

“Is that a rash?” asking hoarse, he clears his throat and sits on the cot.

Slipping into a dark tank top promptly, she covers the small peak of scar that barely shows above her waistband. He doesn’t see the rest but it is a patched burned tissue that stretches from the side of her lower back down through her outer tight curling a bit to the crook of her knee.

She tucks her dog tags under the hem of the tank top and turns her head to answer, “No,” as he stares worried, “-old scar.”

“Seems serious,” he rubs his eyes.

“It was-” she’s not self-conscious about it, or she tells herself as she tries to keep it covered as much as she can, “I’m going for breakfast, you coming?”

He yawns and lays back again, “in a minute.”

When the food is being served, she enters the dining room and sees Carl, for the first time out of the room, next to his parents.

“Morning,” taking a seat next to Beth, she notices not everyone from the group is invited to the table, only the Grimes family and Glenn, who didn’t shy away from inviting her as well.

“What’s up buddy? How are you feeling?” she asks Carl.

“Better-” with a shy smile he drinks some juice.

“He still needs to rest,” Lori states, placing a hand on the boy’s head, “right?”

Carl makes an attempt to fight her on it but Rick responds reminding him all the time he spent in the hospital and that he was lucky he only needs a bit more time to heal.

Despite all the worries about Sophia, the place feels lighter at this hour. They serve eggs with toast, coffee and juice. She banters at times with Glenn and Maggie and it reminds her of hanging with her brothers.

When they’re almost finished, Shane walks into the house with a still noticeable limping on his stride. He snags a toast from the plate at the table while messing with Carl’s new hat, utterly happy seeing the little boy up and well.

“Morning,” directed at the table but his eyes stayed with Brennan’s.

He goes to the kitchen to find the largest mug and fills it with coffee, then he leans on the arched doorway.

Glenn nudges Brennan’s elbow while smirking like a twelve year old cause he doesn’t have anything more entertaining to do, and she squints her eyes at him holding back a laugh, she bites on the inside of her cheek.

“What are we doing today?” Shane inquires sipping from his mug.

“I’ve marked new grids- we’d go through it later with everyone,” says Rick.

“I believe Daryl is already on it- saw him a while ago crossing the fence,” Brennan informs them.

“Yeah- he tends to do that.”

“I wanna go,” Carl pipes up.

“Uh-uh, not today,” Lori reminds him again that he needs to stay in.

**

When breakfast is done, some of them gather on the porch learning the zone they should stick to in the search. Then Rick pairs himself with Shane, T-Dog with Andrea, and Brennan with Glenn.

They’re about to leave when Dale approaches them to tell them there’s a walker in the well.

“Fuck,” T-Dog exclaims looking down at the bloated walker.

Tying up a noose, they hang a rope over the edge in an attempt to put it around its neck.

Unable to do so, Andrea suggest they need live bait for the walker. All eyes on Glenn, who is not too happy for everybody being prone to choose him to do the most dangerous shit, he gives a vague shake annoyed.

He ends up with Shane tying a rope around his waist. Brennan hands him the other noose for him to carry.

“You people are crazy,” says Maggie looking down the well, as the rest grab the rope to lower Glenn into it.

All goes nice and slow up until the pump they were using to brace the rope gets torn off the ground, making everyone lose their grasp on it.

Glenn yells for them to pull him up as he gets close to the walker that reaches for his feet.

T-Dog runs after it and grabs it, with his feet propped on the edge of the well now, holding the piece of metal attached to the rope, as all pitch in to keep him steady and pull Glenn out of the hole.

Out of danger and with their catch around the noose, they yank on the new rope to get the walker out.

Their plan shatters as the walker breaks in half falling back into the well.

Shane rubs his head, suggesting to seal the well and looks to Brennan as she would have an answer about the water.

Maggie grimaces and walks away as soon as T-Dog starts slamming the walker’s head.

**

After the fuck up at the well, they all gear up to go on the search for the day.

Shane calls for Brennan just as she was marching her way with Glenn.

“I’ll catch up,” she signals to Glenn who keeps walking and she turns to Shane, “What’s up?”

“The well- is there anything we need to know?” he demands almost as he was interrogating her.

“Why are you asking me?”

“Don’t give me that shit now- the other night you said we were all infected- does it matter if we drink the water or not?”

“I have no fucking idea, Shane- I saw what I saw- I’m not a scientist.”

“Yeah, no shit,” shading her in annoyance, she recognizes that same cold stare he gave her the night at the school and flips him off before parting ways.

He’s off with Rick and she catches up with Glenn.

Patrolling their grid, Glenn is far from that giggly boy she saw in the morning. He’s focused and fast on his feet. They don’t talk much except for warning each other to look here and there, and those five minute breaks they take too rest and hydrate.

“Is Maggie okay?”

“Yeah- they just haven’t seen that many walkers.”

A few feet away, a roamer interrupts and Glenn picks up his machete, “I got him,” and walks towards it to stick it through his eye, almost slicing the skull of the rotten thing.

When the sun is setting, they arrive behind all the other teams, a heated argument catches her eye when they’re crossing the field. Next to the fence Shane and Rick are clearly discussing something that has Shane jumping off the walls.

By the fire pit, dinner is already being served. Taking her plate, she looks for Shane and spots him going back to his tent, mindfully she grabs another for him.

Sitting wretched on his cot, Shane rubs his hands furiously on his head when she brings him some food.

"Eat," she orders curtly laying a dish with a piece of chicken, tomato slices and some lettuce in front of him.

Bringing to a stop what had him in that state, he picks up the plate and switches on the camping lamp.

Her intention is to go back to the group, with a foot crossing to the other side of the nylon wall he stops her, "don't."

Brennan sighs loudly, “don't what?”

“Please,” he pleads softly low, scooting over to make room for her, “-sorry about this morning.”

Reluctantly, she sits next to him, “I wish I had all the answers- believe me.”

They eat their food in silence, when she’s finishing the last tomato slice, her knee bumps with his on purpose, “mind if I ask you something that might piss you off?”

“Already there- so go ahead,” he scoffs.

“Where did you... buy all these camping gadgets? Did you get a discount after the outbreak?” she gestures playfully pointing at his things.

Letting out a snort as he takes the last bite of his food, “you think you’re hilarious, huh?”

“What?”she mocks, “I really wanna know.”

“I’ve been camping every year with Rick since we were kids-” he says leaving the plate at the table, “-last three summers we’ve been taking Carl and last year I made some upgrades.”

“Now, you live on it.”

“And so do you,” he reminds her, as he leans a hand on his knee tilting his head, “Mind if I ask now- what was that about this morning?

“You’re gonna have to be more specific,” eyes on her empty plate, she plays with the fork as she pretends like she doesn’t know exactly what he’s talking about.

He huffs glancing at her, “At the table- what were you two laughing about?”

“Oh, that,” her eyebrows rise, “have you heard anything about it?”

“I mighta,” with a grin on his face, “-the place is big, but the rumor mill is fast here and these people are bored, Andrea- I heard her talking with Carol about it.”

“Then you know there’s nothing to tell” she huffs, “-I walked out of here and their minds went straight to the gutter- been getting weird looks as well.”

“Do you ever think about it?” he blurts out as his shit-eating grin goes wider.

“I get bored too, you know? of course I’ve thought about it,” she states bluntly, “-for five minutes, tops.”

“Wow- five minutes only. I don’t get more, huh?” he gets stunned and amused by her sincerity.

“I’m a busy woman- you only get five,” she gestures with the fork on her hand before standing up, “-and with that, I gotta go.”

“Now?”

“I signed up for first watch.”

She’s about to walk out when he stands up and grabs her by the elbow to stop her from leaving.

Sliding his hand down to grab her palm softly, “What are you doing?” Brennan asks.

“Givin’ you five more minutes to think about,” he smirks bringing her hand up to his mouth and pressing a kiss above her knuckles, “One.”

Then his mouth brushes up to her forearm where he leaves another, “two.”

Before he goes any further, he whispers on her skin, “is this okay?”

“Yes,” she breathes smiling as his stubble tickles her skin.

Gliding up her upper arm, he smooches another one the shoulder, “three.”

Without hesitation his tongue jugs out and draws the curve of her neck where he takes a small wet nib, “four.”

She closes her eyes as goosebumps spring down to her spine, anticipating his moves her lips tremble for a second.

Soon, his hands are molding her jaw as his mouth has moved into hers, it’s overly sweet when he slowly presses his lips and tongue against hers.

Nervously, she soothes her palms over his arms, taking a firm hold at the reach of his wrists, then his tongue goes deeper in her mouth.

One last lick on her lips and he pulls back, “five.”

“Fuck,” she exclaims promptly hovering over his mouth as his lips draw a half smile.

Biting her lower lip, she shoves him a little to make her way out of the tent.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *smut is coming*


	7. JSS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I stole JSS from Enid.
> 
> Mind the rating, it goes very explicit at some point on this chapter.

Laying on her side, she turns on the ground to lay on her back at the sound of the zipper. Half opening her eyes, she immediately throws an arm up to cover them from the light sneaking in from outside.

She did rise up to exercise as usual, very early. After, she went back to sleep for a while before breakfast, but she didn’t wake up for that.

Shane zips the flap behind him and sits on the cot.

”Mornin’-” he greets placing two peaches on the side table “-here, took these from Glenn.”

Yawning, she half opens her eyes, “What time is it?”

“After seven- we’re leaving for shooting practice- you comin’?”

With her eyes still adjusting to the light she extends her arm to grab one of the peaches, “sure- give me a minute.”

“I’ll give you five,” he raises his shoulders staring down on her with a shit-eating grin.

“Man, I’m never gonna live that down, am I?” she huffs before taking a big bite and bending up to sit.

“Not a chance.” shaking his head.

Crossing her legs, her teeth keep chewing slowly on the piece of fruit until he says, “you know you talk in your sleep?”

Swallowing fast to answer, “yeah, been told that I mumble sometimes. What did i say?” asking curious.

“Like you said, all mumble- random letters- something like J-S-S.”

A soft chuckle, “yeah, that’s not random, my brother says all the time, it’s his personal motto,” she recalls fondly.

“What does it mean?”

“He- he made it out of his name, Jesse- it means _just survive somehow_, guess it stuck with me- stupid, isn't it?” then she frowns, stopping for a moment, glaring at the floor.

As his smile vanishes, “It’s far from stupid- whatever keeps you going, sweetheart, you use it. That’s all that is now,” he bends a bit forwards tilting his head to find her eyes, “-if he’s anything like you- bet he’s out there.”

She nods behind the remains of the peach, “do you have any siblings?”

His head shakes, resting his forearms on his knees, “it was just me and mom- but she passed,” he shares sadly.

“I’m sorry.”

“Thanks- it was years ago, before all this.”

When she’s done, they leave camp for practice.

**

They arrive at the place Shane and Andrea had chosen a mile away from the property.

Brennan and Rick place various cans and bottles on the fence while Shane takes the lead on showing the group the mechanics and instructing how to properly use their weapons before they can shoot.

Once they get a hold of the basics, they load their weapons and stand in a line, safely separated from each other. Shane and the others with experience stand behind the newbies, correcting when needed.

Brennan stays most of the time with Beth and Jimmy.

“That’s good, Beth,” she shouts when she hits her target twice.

Taking a few steps back as they get the hang of it, Shane approaches her to stand by her side, both staring at the rookies firing, "What do you think, Sergeant?"

"They have potential- Andrea is pretty good," she states impressed, "did she get her gun back?"

"Yeah, that's hers,” he relaxes his position by her side and fixes his cap.

As a few shots go off, he leans closer to ask,“the other day- when we found you- you said you’re staying for now, do you think about leaving to find them?”

She thinks about it every day, “that’s the plan.”

“I’m not saying that you should go, but why haven’t you?”

It paralyzes her, parting home to find they’re dead, that thought got her stuck all this time, “I guess rather not know- at least not yet, if that makes sense. Maybe when we find her.”

As he swallows the big _what if we don’t?_ that he almost spits out, “it doesn’t- if I had anyone out there I’d be turning over every rock to find ‘em.”

“And I will-” _soon_, she keeps telling herself.

Shortly after, Rick calls it off and gathers everyone near the vehicles to hand out new assignments.

“Okay, Shane and Brennan, you’re hitting the houses-” he points in the map to a neighborhood half an hour away, “Maggie says it looks empty from outside- we gotta make sure she isn’t there- take a bag in case you find supplies,” he instructs them to.

Then he continues paring some of the newbies like Beth, Jimmy and Maggie, to go out under the care of the experts.

Shane pulls Rick to the side for a moment to question why- deeming it as reckless since this is their first time with a weapon. Rick doesn’t listen, he’s so determined on getting this done one way or another, that he doesn’t weigh the cost of it. “Everyone agreed- I’m not forcing anyone to go out, Shane,” he argues, “-if they don’t wanna go out they’re free to do so.”

Rick looks at everyone, all privy to their conversation as they didn’t move very far, to ask them, “everyone okay with their assignments?”

Most of them nod, as some others hesitate to do so at first.

“There’s no shame in sitting this one out till you get the hang of it-” Brennan inputs to Beth, who seems unsure.

“I’d like to stay,” Beth tells Rick, then Jimmy does the same.

“That’s okay- you go back with Lori and Carl.”

Then Carl argues for a beat that he wants to go out taking their place, but Rick doesn’t waver and sends him back to stay safe at the farm.

**

While Shane sits behind the wheel with his blue police cap on and his elbow resting on the edge of the window, Brennan has stretched her legs over the dashboard with a map unfolded over them.

“I saw what you did back there- you agree with me?” he wonders.

Shrugging, she stares at the map, “you’re not entirely wrong, I wouldn’t want Jimmy at my six just because he can shoot right a few times- there’s more to it.”

“Not entirely wrong-” he huffs, “shit, you should tell that to Rick.”

“You think he’d listen to me? I’m the last one here.”

“I would- Beth and Jimmy did. And Rick- fuck, he’d probably listen to if he wasn’t so fixed on doin’ everything as fast as possible.”

They’re both half right, she believes, “a girl’s life is our hands, while I agree _it is_ dangerous to have everyone out there, he’s not wrong either on keeping everyone motivated to go out- today you gave them that- another tool to defend themselves, even if they’re not ready.”

Then she continues, “ have you thought of not being so against him all the time or at least try to meet him halfway?,” and she folds the map to place it on the dash.

“You know- I- I’d like to bend the corner and find her right there, easy and simple- just like that- take her to her mom,” eyes fixed on the road, his thumb taps a few times on the wheel, “-it’s not like that anymore.”

“You’re right, it’s not, but we can’t just stop just cause it’s harder than before,” staying positive that they’re gonna find her at some point, she looks at him, using his words “let’s turn over every rock, she’s gotta be somewhere.”

“Right on, Sergeant,” even if he doesn’t admit it, he likes her optimism, “what was this place again?”

“Rich people states or some shit like that,” folding the map she puts her feet down, “-next right.”

They arrive to a neighborhood surrounded by walls, with a sign at the gate that says ‘Wiltshire Estates’, parking by the entrance, Brennan opens the half bent metal gate that is fastened by a thin wire.

Shane stands on the floor of the car to gain some height and look over the wall with his binoculars. There are at least 20 or 25 big houses spaced out around an U-shaped neighborhood, all appearing empty as Maggie said, with a few wanderers that Shane spots in front of one of the nearest houses.

Crossing the entrance, they drive around to draw the walkers that come up to the sound of the car, they gear up and take care of them in the street.

Leaving the car not too far from the gate, they start on the left side to work their way up to the curve, as Shane suggests.

They check house by house, encountering a few more of them, not more than one or two per house.

Sticking together for the first five houses, then splitting to go faster.

One of the garage doors rattle loudly with sounds of the undead, as if someone had locked them inside, with feet showing underneath the few inches left opened between the door and the floor and decided to leave that one for last.

They meet up in the middle in between searches to fill up the bag with canned foods and medicine.

Taking a break for lunch, they raid one more place together and hang in the kitchen preparing some food.

Shane leaves his cap on the table and turns on the water that stills runs to prepare the ramen noodles they found in one of the cupboards, “Shit- these people had everything here, wonder what happened for them to abandon all of this.”

“Well, some of them didn't make it out, I guess the other left for the shelters with nothing but what they had at hand,” she can only guess, turning on the gas stove.

The conversation from the field stays with him, "so if you ever leave, how do you plan on doing it?”

She crosses her arms as her lower back rests against the kitchen island, “like I’ve done in the beginning- get supplies, find a vehicle, use the back roads-”

Checking on the water, “that easy, huh?”and turns to lean on the counter in front of her

"Nothing is easy- it’s gonna take me weeks at least, if not months,” locking eyes with him, “- you know- you should come with me,” she says straightforwardly.

“What now?” with a nervous smile he asks confused.

“When we find her, _if we find her_, come with me. We make a good team,” she asserts.

Smugly grinning he steps closer to her, entertaining the thought for a moment. He braces his hands on the edge of the island, caging her with one arm on each side, “Bullshit-” he calls right in her face as he nudges one of her elbows, “You don’t wanna be alone, don’t you?”

Pressing her lips together, “maybe I don’t,” as his face gets closer, he licks his lips, drawing that smug smile again that he plants just close enough for her to feel his warm breath, almost daring her to make the move this time.

Without wavering she takes all the air when she seizes his mouth. Untangling her arms, her hands reach up to clasp at his neck and pull him closer, as he takes a hold at her hips.

The kiss heavy and wet, her eager tongue is clearly determined in tasting every bit of his mouth and he welcomes it.

Shane groans in her mouth at the feeling of her fingers digging deep on his neck.

Breaking for a second to get some air, their foreheads meet. She glances down as her hands glide along his torso aiming to undo his belt and zipper, “Shit- darlin',” with his jaw unclenched.

In a matter of seconds her hand is under his pants firmly stroking him as he goes stiff on her palm.

“Fuck- shit- wait-.”

From the corner of his eye, he notes the water boiling and unable to part from her grab- he extends his arm to turn off the stove, quickly jolting back to brace his hands on the surface behind her, as she pumps him a little harder.

Then he takes the rains, managing to stop her before losing himself in the moment.

Hands roaming her hips, he grabs the hem of her t-shirt to pull it out. Her dog tags, that were tucked under, get tangled on the fabric- she yanks at the chain to free them and they clang back on her chest as he tosses the shirt to his side.

Shane drags his teeth along her neck, as she finishes undoing the only three buttons he had hooked on his shirt and he slips out of it. Then he leans to nib at her lip, taking a firm hold of her hips.

Guiding her, he turns her around, facing the island counter. Shane brushes her hair to one shoulder as he trails a few kisses around the other. Pulling her back against his chest, his hands reach down to unfasten her belt.

Sneaking a hand down her tummy to find her warm flesh over the fabric of her panties. When his fingers hit her clit, she softly gasps as he draws hard circles around it until he feels her juices filtering over the thin cotton, “Shane,” she whimpers, grabbing his forearm.

Pushing his hips against her ass, “Do you want this?” then he nibs at the curve of her neck, “Yeah-” she breathes.

He unclasps her bra, leaving it to slide her skin to the counter-top as she pushes the waistband of her pants down, along with her underwear, to hang a bit under her knees.

Running his hands through her chest, he takes a special interest in her breasts, then she bends forwards, propping her forearms on the quartz slab while her butt grazes his cock.

“Fuck-” he grunts.

Raking a hand down her spine, at the curve of her hip he takes a firm hold as he guides himself into her soaked pussy.

His palms round her ass, squeezing at times on her flesh, he notices the different textured layer of skin that goes from a bit over her hip expending through half of her side thigh, that he saw partially the other day.

Glancing down, he soothes a thumb softly over the peak at her hip as she closes her eyes, whispering _don’t._. Hearing her word he obeys and slides it out around her to palm her breast.

He pushes her hips a bit down, as she positions herself, to find a better angle after his cock slips out a couple times, when his thrust goes deeper with the new position, she finds herself pleading to go harder.

It's rough and fast paced pounding that fills the room with skin to skin slapping mixed with shy moans and groans.

After a few breathy curses with a cry at his name, her body quivers and she buries her head in the crook of her elbow. Biting out a moan, she promptly lifts her shoulders to rest on her forearms as she realizes seconds from coming that they are not using protection.

"Don’t come inside,” she urges whimpering.

“Fuck- okay,”

His body shifts over hers to bite at the curve of her neck and her arm reaches back to clasp at his shoulder.

Her body strains of anticipation and he switches to hard paced thrusts, in less than three her skin vibrates under his body, letting out a choked groan she winces as the orgasm takes over to flow all over her.

When her slicked flesh pressures around his cock he battles the need of releasing inside her, with labored breaths he barely makes it out on time to release on her backside.

His sweat-dampened torso sticks to her back when he lets his upper body fall on top of her back.

Bringing his mouth closer to her ear, panting, “you’re fucking amazing,” biting at her lower lip smiling, she throws back a hand to run over his shaved head.

Once they’ve recovered, he grabs a rag hanging on the wall to clean up his mess.

“Sorry about that,” as she squints embarrassed without moving, “-haven’t been taking anything since- I don't know-months?”

He gently wipes her skin, “nothing to be sorry about,” and tries not to look but the scar on her skin catches his eye every time, hovering his hand over the soft twisted tissue, she draws back quickly of self-awareness to adjust her clothes to their original position.

“Was it on duty?” he asks, zipping his pants.

She clears her throat before responding, “no- it was before.”

“Lemme tell you something,” his eyebrows rise as his mouth quirks up, “-I think it’s kick-ass," and he instantly grins at his words, "no pun intended.”

With a small chuckle, “You do?- People usually find it jarring.”

“I fucking do,” he exclaims stepping closer to frame her jaw, delighted, “-you still hungry?”

“Umm- I could eat.”

Going back to their former task, Shane puts the water to heat again, as Brennan grabs his shirt still laying on the floor and tosses it to him.

She cleans a couple of plates and in a few minutes they’re at the table enjoying their ramen noodles.

“I used to live on these,” as she salivates twirling the fork on her plate.

He hums after filling his mouth with a forkful, leaving a few strays drape over his chin, making her laugh as he slurps them into his mouth.

Making up some conversation Shane, curiously asks if she had a boyfriend before, and she shares with him they broke up over a year ago, after seven solid years of dating.

“...Wasted most of my twenties, I switched posts four years ago when he came to work here- do you know how hard it is to do that?” she remarks shaking her head at the memory.

“Was he army?” taking another bite, he leans over the plate.

“No, he was a reporter at the AJC.”

“Did he give you any reason?”

“Uh-uh, “ as she finishes her food, “I wanna say distance but he seemed okay with it, we both were- he just got bored of me.”

“Find that hard to believe- you’re a trip.”

“What about you?” she asks, folding her arms on the table.

Then he shares with her about his last girlfriend, how he went all out for her in the three years they were together.

“We found the right house, we moved in- I thought marriage was the obvious next step- we talked about it for months- I picked the ring, planned the whole shebang and she said no-” he tells still a little hurt but amused, leaning back on his seat remarking, “-she just said- no.”

“Shit, what happened after?”

“We stayed together for a while- I never blamed her for anything I told her we could wait, but- months later it was over.”

Both sulking for a beat they stare at the table until she opens her mouth to state, “gotta hand it to you Shane Walsh, this was the most depressing after-sex-lunch-talk I’ve ever had,” and he breaks into laughter.

Then, they’re back up to finish the house search, Shane empties the cupboards while Brennan finds toiletries and medicine.

After, they move on to finish the last few homes.

Finally getting to the last one with the walkers in the garage, they both rather climb on the car and go but they need to make sure she isn’t one of them.

Quietly stepping inside, they find the door that goes to the garage.

Taking positions in a hallway, with the front door opened behind them, they open the door to the walkers. Some come out faster than the others, but they don’t get a chance with these two that fire almost in sync, leaving nine bodies to pool on the floor when they’re done.

**

It’s late afternoon when they arrive at the farm and everyone is dispersed doing their tasks.

Andrea is on watch on top of the old Winnebago and the other teams are already back as well, except for Daryl that goes his own way.

Shane pops the trunk open and they start unloading. Glenn, T-Dog and Maggie rush to help them with the goods.

“You hit the jackpot,” Glenn exclaims rummaging through it.

In less than a minute Dale is already urging them to claim their weapons.

“Did you clear all the houses?” Rick approaches Shane.

“Yeah- we said we would- and we did,” still annoyed at him, he stacks canned food in a box Glenn left on the floor.

Brennan goes inside to clean her arms and hands off dried walker splatter. Cupping some water in her hands she washes her face too and ties her hair in a ponytail.

When she walks out she sees four of them running through the field to kill a walker, as Andrea lays down on the top of the RV to keep the rifle steady.

A fire shot goes off and Andrea smiles proudly when she hits her mark. Her face changes when she realizes she shot Daryl and not a walker.

Hershel mends the wound as the rest get dinner ready.

Brennan goes to the tent and lays on the ground, playing with a small paper bag on her hands, with something in it that she took from the stuff they found. Face looking up, trying to decide whether to use it or not.

She yawns, when her eyes are shutting, Shane enters and kicks lightly one of her boots.

"Hey!" she scolds him as he is setting himself on the cot, nudging his boots off and tossing his cap to the side, he rests on his back.

“What a fucking day- man,” he exclaims throwing a hand under his head.

“Wasn’t all that bad,” she glances at him.

And he agrees, looking to her side, her fingers still fidgeting with the bag on her hands, “what you got there?”

“Umm… got you something-” and she tosses the bag to his side, gracefully landing on his chest.

Laced fingers over her stomach, she waits for his reaction.

Taking a box of condoms out of the bag, his brow raises and moves to sit down, licking his lips, “you got me condoms?”

“I mean if you ever want to repeat- it’s fine if you don’t-” she rushes.

“That is a very bold assumption you made there, Sergeant-” he remarks looking at the box, “-a great 36 assumption that I look forward to,” smirking he puts it over the table and lays back down again, “that good, huh?”

“That good,” she agrees, biting her lip.

**

After dinner, before everyone is back at their tents to put a pin on the day, they discreetly sneak back to Shane’s to put to good use one of those condoms. Keeping the light out and the flap close to avoid prying eyes, they have sex once again.

Shedding all their clothes this time, they end up laying on the ground over the spread-out sleeping bag that he lent her.

Brennan’s resting on her stomach painting as he leans on an elbow on her side, tracing her spine down with his other hand.

“You didn’t answer my question,” she whispers after clearing her throat.

“When?”

“Earlier, at the house- I said come with me.”

“I think I already did- twice,” he jokes, stirring a small laugh out of her.

“You want us to sail into the sunset together?”

“I’m not asking you to marry me, Shane- we can keep each other company- and maybe start over somewhere else.”

He scowls trying to come up with an answer but he doesn’t.

“Just think about it, okay?” and he vaguely nods before pressing a kiss on her shoulder.

His fingers move farther down, ending up on the burned tissue on her thigh, she doesn’t stop him this time when he softly brushes his palm over it.

“I don't know your name,” he realizes.

She moves to lean on her forearms and meet his eyes in the stark light, “you didn't ask.”

Feeling his way through her neck to find the chain to her dog tags, he hooks it with a finger and pulls a little till they meet his hand.

He tries to make out what the say in the dark but he can’t see for shit, then he traces the letters with his thumb.

“I'm asking now,” he tilts his head.

With a faint smile washed-out in the shadows, she tells him.

“Olivia.”


	8. Olivia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has a bit of everything, just a warning though... there's a very cheesy introduction to their first baddie(s), sorry for that.

Brennan didn't carry many personal items with her, not now and not then in fear of losing them, but she held onto this handmade bracelet with lettered beads spelling her name and twined in a green braid that her niece sent her last year.

Still fazed with the idea of going back home to find out what happened to them, her mind jumps between memories of the last time she last saw each one of them.

I’d be over a year now, last time she visited her hometown before her last deployment.

They had a big family dinner at her father’s, with the exception of the middle brother, Jesse, who was away at the time. She said goodbye to everyone, including her sister-in-law, niece and her brother Max. As he was trying to say goodbye, his daughter would clamp her arms on Brennan’s waist, blocking everyone else from touching her, so he had to lock his arms around both of them, “stay safe, Olive Oyl,” as he would call her since she was born.

Her father walked with her to the car to give her the longest hug before climbing into it. He would try to convince her to stay, like he’d usually do, locking her arms tight she would listen to him ramble. His speech always ended with his own of saying _I love you_, in a very warm menacing tone he’d remark- _be smart and be careful, and come back, you hear me? or else._

She found the bracelet tied to a belt loop in her jeans this morning when she traded her fatigues for regular clothes for a day.

It must have fallen off at some point and she didn’t notice. Before dinner, while she was helping Maggie organize the pantry they established in the shed, Shane tapped a couple times on the wooden wall, stopping to look at him.

“Hey, this yours?” and on his hand he holds the braid she recognizes as hers.

Grabbing it for his hand, “yeah, thanks,” she nods and ties it back on her waistband.

“You don’t wear it?”

Her head indicates no.

“That’s cute- Olivia,“ he remarks amused, ”old boyfriend made it for you?” he smirks leaning on the door frame, making Maggie chuckle while stocking some cans.

“No, asshole,” she shakes her head, “it was my niece’s.”

Before he can’t say anything back, they are called upon for dinner. A dinner that Carol and Lori prepared as a thank you to Hershel and his family for aiding them for the time being.

**

The clanking of the silverware on their plates stand out over the few words shared here and there.

She notes Shane's eyes stare mostly at his food, with Patricia sitting in front of him, she realizes they haven’t been spending much time with the people at the farm. Now he sits uncomfortable on his chair with all coming back about that night. She wants to reach out or make it easy for him in a way, but she’s uncomfortable too- she’d have rather told the truth about that night and now it has gone too far.

For questionable reasons that she has yet to understand, she does trust Shane and hopes for the best outcome for him and for everyone else.

After dinner, Shane sits on a chair on top of the RV with his rifle propped on his thigh when she climbs the stairs to sit on the surface next to him.

Staring at the tree line, he knows something is on her mind, “what?”

“Nothing,” she shakes her head.

“Come on, spit it out.”

Glaring at the distance, she spots a flickering white light that shines for a few seconds before quickly rushing away in between the trees, “are you seeing that?”

“Yeah- yeah-” reaching for his binoculars laying down next to him, he stands up and follows the light for a few seconds before it completely shuts or fades into the darkness of the woods.

“Shit- get your weapon.”

Both rushing down, as Shane alerts Rick and Daryl she gets her handgun from Dale’s safekeeping and rushes the tent to gather her night vision gear.

Shane looks around, checking everybody’s at camp or in the house, “is anybody missing?”

All are accounted for.

Without saying a word, they all follow Shane through the field that led them to the farm the first day.

“What did you see exactly?” Rick questions.

“A light flickering for a few seconds and then it moved away fast- like someone running with it.”

When they get to the fence they all are armed up. She has lent Shane the scope that he’s already familiar with and attaches it to his weapon, while Rick and Daryl carry a couple of flashlights.

Crossing over, Shane and Brennan take the lead of carefully guiding them up to the place they see what they think it was a flashlight.

It doesn’t take them long, less than 20 feet away, the search party finds a walker's severed head still moving laying by a tree. Daryl uses an arrow to end its misery.

Scanning the area, Daryl points at the ground with his torch to the fresh show prints in the grass, “there.”

“Do we follow?” whispering, she turns to look at Shane.

Tilting his head, “it’s late- whoever was creepin’ has the advantage on us now- we can’t leave the farm unprotected-” and he glares at Rick.

“I agree,” says Rick, holstering his pistol down and pacing for a moment observing the scene.

Another light goes off, this time brighter and farther south, about a hundred feet away.

“Shit-”

They all run towards it and there’s a trail of more heads leading them to something or somewhere. As they get ready to follow the trail Brennan stops them.

“Wait- they’re drawing us away from the farm.”

Shane fixes tensely his rifle on his shoulder, “she’s right- they could be looking to break into it- we should get back.”

Observing the zone as they inadvertently form a back to back circle, with each of them keeping their eyes on their direction to quickly make their way back to alert the others.

Facing this unknown threat, they take their first precautions by putting most of them in watch duty all night.

Covering all sides in pairs, she watches over west with Glenn by the shed, while Shane and Rick patrol around the property several times, checking all the watch posts, every two hours or so.

As the hours pass by Glenn lays on the uncomfortable rusty swing settled by the structure and closes his eyes while she stays up, listening at times the screech of metal chains when he squirms in his sleep.

She’s used to little sleep or none at all, once she’s aware of a possible threat she goes restless.

Quite early in the morning, they decide to return to pick up last night’s grim trail made out of heads that someone left for them. It ends up at the Thompson’s house that sits three miles away from the Greene property.

Through the windows, they can see the house harboring a group of walkers divided in two rooms thoroughly locked up, something Brennan, Shane and Glenn saw a few days ago in a similar situation.

At the door, a knife pinned with a note that Shane picks up, handing the knife to Daryl he reads the paper quietly before telling the others.

“We have something you want and we want to trade-”

“Sophia,” Rick says out loud before he can’t finish.

“If you agree to the trading, no one will suffer. If not, her end is with the skin eaters,” with a snarl he continues with a line separated at the end, “we’ll meet soon.”

“Assholes,” scoffing, he passes the note to Rick and runs a hand through his chin.

“Shit- they been watchin’ us for days?” Daryl states in anger, “they could be messin’ with us- she could still be out there, man.”

“We don’t know that-” Shane shakes his head to state, “think, man- how she was, how she is- what’s more likely? that somehow she survived this long on her own or that someone- some dirtbag found her and took her?”

Brennan paces around the porch, looking through the window, observing every walker, “if they want something, why not just take it?”

“They probably don’t have the numbers to pull something like that-” Shane scoffs, “rounding the walkers, the heads, the note- dumbasses want to make us think there’s a whole lotta them.”

“Do you really think they have her?” asking directly to both officers.

“It’s more than we had yesterday- it’s worth checking,” Rick responds by putting the piece of paper in his pocket and getting a grip on his weapon, “let’s clear the house- see if they left anything and we- we’ll think of something later.”

Entering the house, everything reeks of death- not just from the walkers but animals laying cold all over the house, torn apart, supposedly used at bait.

Putting them all down, they search the house for any clue. She sees Shane and Rick agreeing and working together as partners for once.

Trying to wrap their minds about what they might be facing, they question every possibility as they walk back to the farm.

She strides her own pace, planning an escape route in her mind just in case. It was easier somehow when it was just her, now she plans for different people. It’ll take different cars, provisions, a meeting point- she makes a list of everything that might be useful.

Her thoughts get interrupted when Shane calls for her, “Olivia- ” and her feet stop for a second to look at him, “yeah?”

As he tightens the distance, she goes back on walking with him to her side, “you all right?”

She hums, “just thinking- we need... we’re gonna need a way to escape or to hold the farm if someone tries to- I have no fucking idea what they’re after but right now, I’m thinking several cars, provisions at hand- packed and ready, rendezvous if we get separated…”

“Got it-” nodding, “does your mind ever stop working?”

“I don’t think so- no,” she gulps worried, “we have to consider that if they have her- and she’s hurt or- how are we gonna-”

“I know- it’s making me sick too,” he scowls and his free hand involuntarily reaches for the middle of her back, to pat softly a few seconds before soothing it down to hook a finger on one of the loops of her jeans.

She notes a little tug on the waistband, then her mouth shyly smiles and goes serious quickly again to question, “did you ever handle hostage situations?”

“A couple.”

“What are the odds, you think in this case?”

Tilting his head, “depending on the demands and the willingness of everyone to cooperate- if it’s the farm what they want, Hershel is not gonna be happy about that.”

As they approach the property, they sweep the perimeter outside the fence once more before going back inside.

“We should check the house from the other day- see if someone’s back there,” Shane suggests.

“Just us?”

“That’s right- we can’t have everyone out there, not like this.”

Another conversation about carrying weapons inside the farm is opened when Rick explains to Hershel what happened.

The man doesn't look too happy about it but he half agrees to let them carry a couple, hand picking Rick and Brennan as the carriers, seeing he doesn't seem to trust Shane very much.

Luckily, her sneakiness is serving them well, so she entrusts Shane with the glock she's kept hidden for days.

Without anything concrete yet, the initial plan is to keep the outings to a minimum. That day nobody gets out, with the exception of Brennan and Shane.

While the others, stay alert making hourly rounds for any sign of whoever is threatening them under the suspicion they might have the girl.

**

It’s been quite a day, as they get to the cottage they found the first day, passing the hanging walker and the cabin, empty as before.

They check the perimeter marked with traps to find a few walkers pinned in the jaws. Quietly, they use their knives to put them down.

Following the dirt road, when they are arriving at the property they can already see it’s filled with walkers, more than earlier in the day, more than any they’ve encountered before.

Instead of entering, Shane signals Brennan to walk around it and check the interior through the windows.

Roamers hit the walls and scratch the window, startling themselves anytime one hits a piece of furniture or the wind chimes hung inside by one of the windows.

They meet at the back.

“What do you say, Officer? Should we get the cavalry?” she questions keeping her eyes on the windows and entrances, with a hand over her holstered weapon as a precaution.

Shane vaguely nods with his eyes scanning the place, worried, “maybe bring Andrea and T, later or tomorrow morning-” and he sighs taking a good look around, “these fucking assholes...”

“You think they’re watching?”

“Could be- they know what we’re doing so it’s safe to say they’ve been watching for a few days.”

As a cloud starts graying the day, they start walking back, picking up the pace when a thunder echoes through the forest.

“Can I ask you something?” He asks.

“Sure.”

Hesitating for a bit, “Who did you kill?”

“Does it matter?” she glances at him.

“I showed you mine, right?”

“Because I was there,” she points out.

“Yes- you were- but since then you’ve been awfully quiet about it- and I- I know I asked you to, but you wanted to say something last night-”

“It’s really messed up, Shane- I don’t think it could help your situation at all.”

“Maybe not-” staring at the ground, “I guess I’m curious about it.”

She sights, wondering which one or how to even begin to explain something like that.

“Can I save it for later?” as her head turns to him to see him nod, she misses the trap that she was about to step in.

Shane grabs her arm fast, pulling her hard to the side as her foot was about to hit the trigger.

It doesn’t go off, but she loses her balance a little and ends up braced upon Shane’s chest.

And she starts laughing, almost hysterically.

“That wasn’t funny...” he says, straightening her up on her feet.

“Come on, it was not _not_ funny,” her brow raises diverted.

“Man, we’ve been up too long,” as he tries to not smile, the little curve of the corner of his mouth does different and his body relaxes after the scare.

Securing his rifle with one hand on his side, his other extends to brush a strand of hair that gets blown across her face by a gust of wind.

"I'm okay, you know."

“You’re more than okay,” he says slightly smirking with his palm cupping her face, "I’d say fine as hell."

With a smaller laugh, her head moves to print a kiss on his palm.

Then she squints amused, wrinkling her nose, “bet you say that to all the ladies."

His head leans slightly, grinning he dips a bit, “only the ones who can kill me.”

Nuzzling her nose with his lips before leaving one on her mouth, his hand moves to the back of her neck to hold her head steady- softly entering her mouth, his tongue presses slowly against hers.

Her hands glide along his back over the light blue button down he is wearing.

When they break from the kiss, Shane's forehead lingers close to hers.

“What are we doing Shane?” She asks low breathing over his lips.

“You tell me, darlin’,” as he gets close again, he plants another one on the corner of her mouth.

He promptly breaks from her and crouches down to lay down his weapon carefully on the grass, “come here,” and extends a hand for her to come down.

As she moves low to lean on her knees, his arm curls around her waist to lay her body on the ground.

Placing both forearms on each side on his head, he settles his hips between hers, and his head aims down to capture her mouth again. Teasing her lips with his tongue, she vaguely complains saying his name in between licks.

Sighing, as she didn’t know exactly what was going to happen, she questions with her speech racing, “you wanna do this here? you know it’s about to rain? what if they are...”

“This is how much I care right now,” he responds grinding softly.

And her hands move up to frame his jaw to bring him back into her mouth.

With her fingers raking at his neck, her legs bend up to give him a little more space and her thighs line up with his hips that push a little deeper.

Moaning quietly on his lips, her palms move in between them to give him a small push- he arches his torso for a moment while her fingers unbutton his shirt.

Gliding her nails down his bare chest, Shane gets on his knees fast and removes his shirt off.

Then his hands sneak under the hem of her tank top, that he pushes up at once while she bends up just enough for him to take it over her head.

With his necklace dangling in between, she catches it on her palm and with a bit of a pull she claims his body back to feel his skin.

Framing her face, he looks at her eyes while he moves his hips wildly getting aroused at all of hers.

Her lips part and she tries to stare back but her face adverts to the side, feeling a little over seen by him in the moment.

Hovering over her, his hand runs down her side, trailing her shoulder and upper arm, it grazes her breast over the bra when he moves to her ribcage.

Aiming for the waistband, his wrist bump with the handgun on her hip- that he blindly unholsters to put next to his rifle.

Looking back at him, “you’re playing a very dangerous game right there, Walsh- if those roamers get loose-”

“I swear, darlin'-” he interrupts to urge her, “I just wanna touch you for a minute- that okay? or you wanna keep talkin’?”

Drawing a smile she nods and his body separates to lean on his side, near hers on the ground.

Placing an arm on the grass for support, with his other hand his fingers trail down her stomach, he finally gets to the edge of her belt that he dexterously undoes, along with the button and the zipper of her jeans.

His palm is warm over her soft skin that titillates with anticipation at his touch.

Giving a tug at the unzipped fabric, Shane sneaks his fingers under the band of her panties, while her hips shift aching for his hand, “did you bring one?”

“Do you think I planned for this?” with a grin he travels farther down to tease her slit.

“Shane,” she whimpers, almost complaining.

“Shh, shh... this will do, I promise.”

His hand moves nicely massaging her sex, awakening every cell- when her first drops hit his fingers, he slides deeper into her lips to caress her folds and rub her clit with the side of his index finger.

Squeezing her eyes shut, she curses his name and grips his forearm that moves accordingly with his touch.

Holding a moan, she gasps quietly when he grazes her entrance to put two fingers inside her.

Staring at her, tensing her muscles and heaving, he ups the rhythm.

“Fuck-” she winces and her hand glides up to grip at his shoulder.

His tips circle and push in motion around her delicate flesh, while his thumb pad presses on her clit.

“Open your eyes, darlin’” hissing low.

It takes her a moment but she does, and looks back into his dark stare, as his steady hand keeps moving gracefully, pressing on the right spots.

It gets overly intimate for such an open space.

Her other arm tries to reach sloppily between both their bodies to caress over his already built bulge over his pants, and she manages to palm his length.

As her stomach coils and he goes faster- inadvertently, her lids go down again, with her legs fighting to clench, he shifts a little to use one of his knees to pin hers open.

“Hey- look at me,” begging, “please.”

Trying her best, she does- completely taken away by him, her nails sink on his collarbone, while he watches her strain every part of her body, pushing harder on his leg, he finally lets her go when she’s about to come- as a loud moan she was holding inside escape her mouth, her knees clasp together trapping his hand for a few seconds after her release.

When her body relaxes, she grabs his face in one hand, soothing her thumb over his cheek, “that was so good,” she grins and he puckers leaning down to press a quick kiss.

A loud thunder goes off and they both look up.

“Just good, huh?” his brow raises pretending to be offended.

She bends up and quickly nudges him to lay on his back while her leg goes over his body to straddle his hips, looking down on him, “meant to say- mind blowing,” she over states mocking him.

Placing her hands on his chest, with her lower back pressing down to feel him just as hard as before, and teases him a bit, “now you wish you would’ve brought one, huh?”

He laughs grabbing at the curve of her hips, “It’s your rule- I really don’t care, darlin'- if you wanna break it-”

“I really don’t wanna play baby roulette right now.”

Circling over him, her ass scoots back a little and she unclasps his belt, unbutton his cargo pants and pulls down his boxer briefs just enough for her to do him.

Wrapping one hand on his length, her body sifts over him, and uses her other to brace on his chest.

Using her new found knowledge of his staring whim, she tries to do just as much for him- hovering over his face, without kissing him, she watches him unclench his jaw and squinting on reflex.

When he notes what she’s doing, his eyes fight to stay open as well.

His hands, roaming her bare waist and back, he unhooks her bra that he slips off to fall between them, it gets quickly pushed aside, and his palms glide all over her chest for a moment before, rounding her back to rake at her spine.

As he’s getting close, his fingers dig harder, pulling her down closer to him. When her mouth touch his, she sucks on his lower lip while her hand swings faster for him to finish.

With a groan on his mouth, his body stiff for a moment after he’s done and she lets go of him to lay over his torso while he recuperates.

When he gets his air back, his grip loosens to round her body lazily resting over his, with her face placed on his shoulder.

He hums and she presses a smile on his collarbone, while his palm soothes at her rear.  
“We should get back.”

With a long sight, “Yeah- we should.”

After a few minutes of just relaxing there, another thunder goes louder and they get back up to fix their clothes.

When Shane picks his rifle, he finds Olivia’s green bracelet, again, almost camouflaged between the grass .

Holding it up, “put your wrist up,” he orders and she glances at him, confused, “you won’t lose it if I tie it up.”

Reluctantly, she lifts her palm up and he settles the braid around her wrist and ties it thoroughly.

When he’s done, he makes sure it is not either tight or loose, then her fingers try to break the knot yanking at the ends.

“It’s not coming off-” he scoffs at her attempt of undoing his work.

Shrugging, “I had to check.”

**

The get back at the farm, just before it could rain, it doesn’t- it just stays that way for the most part of the day.

They sleep it off for a couple of hours before going back on watch for the night, as some of the others keep an eye for anything.

When she wakes up, Shane is gone and the day has completely darkened outside.

Brennan takes a walk around checking on everybody and finds Shane sitting by the closed well.

Sitting next to him, she crosses her legs and places a bottle of water on the ground, “you have the glock, right?”

Lifting the hem of his shirt, he shows her that it’s tucked in his waistband.

“You didn’t wake me up,” and her mouth gestures a small yawn.

Turning his face to her, “I tried but you were totally out.”

Running both hands on her face, she covers another yawn, “yeah, sorry.”  
“Pff- don’t be, you’ve been out there since day one- if anyone deserves to rest is you.”

It’s one of the most thoughtful gestures someone has made for her in months, she doesn’t know how to respond to it, so she just nods.

“Do you think they’re gonna do something tonight?”

“Beats me-” he shrugs, “whatever they’re thinking they should just get on with it.”

They sit there for hours, restless checking at all sides, as the white noise of a talkie gets to her ears.

Shane picks up the talkie sitting on his other side to update Rick.

Asking where that comes from, Shane tells her they had them before but they had no juice, but Glenn found some batteries.

They don’t talk much, as they both stay focused at all times but as the hours pass by, they exchange a few words.

Past midnight, Shane carefully inquires about her past once again.

“It won’t change a thing- about how I see you, if that is troubling you.”

“It’s not that, I-” she tries to process, again, what she went through, what she’s learned to live with.

Not one, but two kills that she carries.

Low and calmly she confides in him, “I- I never really saw real firefight, you know?” she begins telling him, occasionally looking at him.

“I did mostly clean up for the big guns- clearing small towns before they could enter the city-” and she clears her throat, “-there was this compound in the desert, mostly farmers, we took the families out- checked the houses for any potential threats, detained and gathered explosives...”

He listens closely to her story with his eyes all over.

As the events play on her head, she recalls how she entered this house with a family that refused to leave. As they were trying to reason with them to escort them out of the house, the man got really nervous and pulled out a gun from his back.

As her voice breaks a little, recounting everything out in the open for Shane, she continues that she quickly aimed to put a bullet in his head point blank. Then her unit had to drag the grieving family by force- while she froze when checking the gun that the man had to find out it was empty after all.

“He wasn’t a terrorist, he- he was just- I don’t know, standing his ground to this situation that he didn’t ask for, I guess,” she swallows nervously.

Shane furrows looking at her, “but you didn’t know.”

“I- I knew he didn’t want to hurt anyone- he was just afraid- I could have tried to disarm him instead.”

And she’s played over and over inside her head all the ways she could have changed the situation.

“Say you do that- you get closer, you manage to take his weapon, then what? you would have taken him and he’ll be dead too- if not there, somewhere else- you had orders, right? detain anyone who was a threat- and-” he tries to reason based on what he knows.

“I’m not really- I don’t wanna go through over again- did that a while ago, Shane.”

She stares at the ground for a beat and takes a sip of her water, “it’s okay- well, not okay but I can live with it- it’s just it’s hard to-”

“Think about it-,” he finishes with his eyes welling up, “thanks for telling me, though.”

“Yeah.”

Around three hours later, they get relieved by T-Dog and Andrea and they finally get to sleep for a few hours before starting all over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shane pov/centered chapter is coming up! Eventually, most chapters won't be just one or the other. I have a lot of stuff to edit but I'm really enjoying working on this, so thank you for still reading :)


	9. Shane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a bit over the top, just like Shane. It kinda got away from me, there's a flashback that was supposed to be just 2-3 paragraphs but it ended up being 2 pages long. I love my sad dramatic backstories...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New warning on the tags, it's not depicted but there's an implied reference to rape. It has nothing to do with Shane or any of the group.

Shane pulled up by their house after his shift. His partner knew he was going to stall as much as possible going back home so he invited him to dinner that day.

He knew what was waiting for him- her leaving for good. He said what he needed to and she made her choice- after three years together, she decided to pack her stuff and end this relationship.

This dinner, as much as it would remind him of everything he could have- of everything he wanted, they were his family.

Everyone was blindsided as much as him, she was part of the family and couldn’t understand why she so abruptly was cutting ties with him. 

They didn’t talk about it anymore and they could only try to distract him- he played some video games with Carl before dinner and then they all sat together to enjoy the food Lori prepared to keep his mind out of everything.

Later, when Rick had to return briefly to the station, Shane helped Lori doing the dishes, while he was washing in the sink, she would pick them up from the rack to get rid of the water with a rag.

He couldn’t help but ask Lori, for she was a close friend with her girlfriend, “I mean, did I make it all in my mind?”

“What? No- Shane, please. I was as shocked as you- she often said she wanted to.”

He was racking his brain, looking for something- anything he would’ve done wrong that made her get cold feet on the last second. He only could find little things- the day he got late to pick her up, that other time he accidentally messed up with her work papers, those days when he was too tired to do laundry- all were inconsequential, she never really complained- she would just crease for a few seconds before realizing it wasn’t really a big deal.

When he was done with the plates, she gave him a hug, “It’s her loss, Shane,” she tried to comfort him patting him on the back, “you’ll find someone else in no time.”

“I don’t want anyone else, Lori,” he stated, breaking from the hug, terrified of losing another person in his life.

After leaving the Grimes residence, he drove around for a while listening to something on the radio that he couldn’t even pay attention to.

He thought she’d be gone by the time he came home, but she was gathering the last things when he arrived.

“You’re really doing this,” he tossed his bag by the door and leaned on the backrest of the couch to take a good look around.

Everything in the house was still as usual- it looked like she was only taking her own stuff. None of the things they bought together made it to any of the boxes. Which seemed odd to him that she didn’t want to take any of the memories they made in the last few years. All the pictures she took, all the furniture they picked, any reminder of their life together was dismissed.

She was closing a box filled with work documents and settling in on top of the other, by the couch.

“Shane- I love you, but when you- I didn’t feel like I was ready for what you wanted me to be.”

“And what’s that?,” he wondered.

Caroline sighted, lifting her shoulders and placing her hands on her hips, “You- you want us to be like them-” she pointed at a photo on the shelf of Rick, Lori and Carl, “I know you have this picture-perfect in your mind of having everything-”

“Never said that, baby- I never said it had to be perfect,” he shook his head.

“Then why are you trying to rush it?”

“Rush it? We talked about it for almost two years-” he raised his voice a little and straightened his posture to pace around, “pff, I just- is it that wrong to want everything?”

“It’s not honey- but sometimes I felt like you were just trying to get on with it, like it was just a chore on your checklist and after your grandma- you got all-”

“I didn’t-,” he snarled with tears welling up.

“Yes, Shane- you clung onto me like I was your last thread. It was a lot of pressure on me- to live after both of them. I could never be-”

“Please-” he pleaded, swallowing those tears back, “...if I ever did that- it wasn’t... I didn’t mean to put that on you, Care, I just....”

A couple of steps closer, she framed his face with her hands trying to soothe him before leaving, “I know, babe- I just I wish I could be that for you- I’m not- I can’t be,” as his heart broke in front of her, he pulled her close to hug her one more time before parting.

After that, he took a few beers and fell asleep on the couch.

With his arm hanging on the side, resting on his stomach, with a serious crease- his eyes refused to open when he heard her voice softly calling for him, like she was sorry to wake him up.

As a warm hand soothes on his bicep, “Shane?” she whispers.

“Come on, _Sleeping Deputy_,” her voice is a little higher and with a tone of amusement at her own remark.

Opening an eye he sees Olivia crouching by the side of his cot, “did you call me _Sleeping Beauty_?”

“That got your attention, huh? I said Deputy- _Sleeping Deputy_” and her hand moves to stroke at his fuzzy head with care.

He turns to lay on his side, “everything alright?”

“So far,-” she moves to sit on the floor, “I’m taking T, Andrea and Glenn to the house of death- are you coming?.”

“I think you got it covered, Sergeant” he observes her hair tied up in a ponytail and her tan t-shirt damped in sweat, “did you just go for a run?”

“Uh-huh,” she smiles.

“You're unbelievable,” he states as his body scoots back on the cot- then he extends an arm inviting her to lay down next to him.

She gladly takes the offer and with her back on his chest, she places her head over his arm, and he curls it around her to lock with his other.

“I didn’t even go too far- I just did a little sweeping over the fence.”

“What if they are out there and you’re alone?”

“What if I'm out there and _they_ are alone,” she points out, “-as far as we know they could be just a couple kids playing with us.”

“You don't have to be so tough all the time, you know?”

“That's bullshit, Shane,” she rolls her eyes, “would you ever say that to a guy?” she questions annoyed tapping with her fingers on his forearm.

“If I cared about that guy then yeah,” he gracefully defuses.

And her tone changes as her mouth curves softly on the side, “are you saying you care about me, Walsh?”

He has tried not to, but he does. He fucking cares about her, knowing she's going to leave at some point is bothering him more than it should. He has done that mistake too many times, he cares too deeply too soon, and he knows it. He wants to not care. He’s been burned not too long ago and doesn’t want to go through it all over again.

Trying to keep everything as casual as they’ve been doing he lets out a “maybe,” and he plants a kiss on the curve of her neck.

“Do you care about me?” he whispers over her slicked neck.

Squeezing fondly at his forearm, she admits a little timid, “yeah.”

“Why don’t you stay today?” he tries to convince her, locking his arms tightly around her, “let someone else go.”

“It’ll be just a couple of hours,” her nose presses on his forearm, “why don’t you come with us?”

Andrea holler for her from outside and he reluctantly lets her go

“We can’t all be gone if they decided to show up, darlin’.”

“I know,” sitting on the cot, she uses her finger to draw the shape of his nose, “stay frosty, Deputy.”

“Right back at ya,’” and his face cutely wrinkles at her touch.

**

After having a cup of coffee, he’s entrusted to fix the mill’s perch to set up a lookout there.

These clouds are heavier than the day before and they seem to be carrying more heat and humidity than usual. His shirt gets drenched in seconds, which doesn’t bother him. He carefully climbs and fixes the thing thoroughly.

By the time he goes back down, he finds Lori leaning on the side of the truck.

With her eyes on him with a shallow smile, “Happy birthday.”

Confused, his brow narrows.

“I’ve been checking the calendar- today is the 9th, your birthday, right?”

Nodding, “thanks.”

“What do you think is going to happen about all this, do we need to worry?” she asks.

“You should talk to Rick about it.”

“I’m asking you Shane-”

“He didn’t tell you, did he?” he huffs.

Shaking her head, “we’re not in the best of terms right now.”

Doesn’t even have to wonder why, he knows he’s part of the reason, even though he’s stayed away from them for quite a while now. Even when he wanted to reach out to Carl, she’s gone beyond to make sure that didn’t happen.

“What’s this about Lori?” his voice inquires, annoyed.

“He knows.”

She doesn’t have to say anything else. Rick knows about the two of them.

“I didn’t tell him- he- he figured it out...”

Looking down, he fidgets with the hammer on his hand. Pondering what to respond but he comes up blank.

“He’s not even angry- he just nods and goes do whatever he’s doing these days.”

“What do you want me to do about it?”

“Nothing- I just thought if we could do something later- the four of us like we used to do, maybe we can put things back to normal.”

“Normal? Take a look around, everyone is fucking tired looking out for this place and you’re thinkin’ about having a dinner party?” his mouth snarls, sharply staring at her.

“We take care of this place- me, Carol, Patricia, Hershel, Beth- we keep things running, trying to make a decent living here- while you get to go out and have your time with your girlfriend, that hasn’t even offered her help just once,” she angrily blurts out.

Scoffing, he rashly throws the hammer at the toolbox.

“Are you fuckin' kiddin' me? Everything falls apart and that’s all you care about? she’s been out since day one- she’s out there right now- ” his voice deeply increases, and his arm extends to point at the distance.

Then he continues after taking a quick breath, “I’ve stayed out of your way- I said I was leaving and you asked me to stay, every time I talk to Carl you push him aside- I try to reason with Rick and you keep doin’ whatever the hell your doing to get him to go against me,” his speech is fast but he slows down make a point “-but I find someone and you suddenly... what? get jealous?”

“No, Shane- that’s not it at all” she stutters, “she- she’s a stranger here- I- I don’t trust her. I’m just looking out for you.”

Clicking his tongue he walks around past her, “you don’t have to,” and he gets into the truck’s cabin to drive away.

Pissed off, he takes off for a drive along the dirt road for a couple of miles, like he used to when something bothered him. Sometimes he just drove around, other times he got taken out and sat just listening to the radio to clear his head.

He didn’t really care about his birthday, not today, not under these circumstances- seemed like the worst day to stop and pay attention to something that used to be a big deal before the outbreak.

Pulling up on the middle of the road, to think of what to do next, he dozes off for a minute and his mind drags him to the day everything changed- not when she left but when Rick got shot.

It was not long after she did though, four maybe five weeks later. On his dwelling journey he didn’t hesitate to start going out more than he needed to push her out of his mind. When he was bantering with Rick about it, his later conquers and all, and eating some fries, they responded to a call that got Rick in a coma.

Then it’s all a blur of things happening at the same time- the outbreak, trying to reach out Caroline, the hospital, getting Lori and Carl to somewhere safe, the bombings, ending up by the quarry- Lori- Rick coming back- the CDC- miles of road- Otis’ death- the dead trampling on everything- then her.

The blur stopped with her. Olivia. Who he has to let go at some point, he knows he has- but he doesn’t want to.

When his eyes open, it’s pouring down as a walker stumbles on his door trying to get to him through the small crack of the window.

Pulling his knife out, he jams it into his eye and it goes down to the mud.

Backing up the vehicle, he drives over another one and his head turns to see a small herd coming his way.

Starting the truck, he drives slowly to lure them away from the farm.

“That’s it, assholes,” mumbling, he glances at the rear-view mirror making sure they don’t veer off.

Taking a turn, he finds Carl running on the side of the dirt road with his gun in his hand trying to shoot at two roamers behind him.

“The hell are you doin’ man,” he yells speeding to get to him.

Then he stops by his side, taking his gun out- Shane shoots at those two walkers, “get in right now,” he shouts at the little boy, who climbs fast into the passenger seat.

Under his Sheriff hat, the boy is completely drenched.

“What the hell were you thinking?” Shane asks slamming the door after getting back behind the wheel.

“Doing what you’re not- looking for her,” the boy states annoyed.

“You can’t do that, Carl,” and he starts steering again, “look, there’s more behind us- you can’t get out on your own.”

“Then why aren’t you out there- why did you stop lookin’?”

“We didn’t,” gazing at the boy that sits straight in his place, eyes sharp and serious like a little man, “we have something going on... but we haven’t stopped looking, okay?”

He keeps driving with the herd on his tail and takes them to the road, by the area Sophia ran away.

Climbing out, he warns Carl to stay inside while he takes care of the walkers.

Under the pouring rain, he readies his rifle on his shoulder and awaits for them by one of the abandoned vehicles that he uses as cover.

They’re slower than usual in this weather, he realizes. That gives him plenty of time to point and shoot keeping a safe distance.

When he’s done, he gives Carl a minute to put the supplies they left for Sophia inside the car, under the written message on the windshield.

Then, they’re on the move again back to the farm, where everyone is worried wondering where the hell he was. He gets scolded by Lori and taken inside the house.

Shane sits by the railing on the porch with Rick on his side.

“Thanks, man,” says Rick.

He only nods without even looking at him, while his stare fixes on the distance, and the rain slowly dying down.

“She’ll be fine,” he adds propping a hand on one of the columns.

“Who?”

“Brennan, right? You’re worried about her, she’ll be fine,” he repeats.

“I’m not worried about her, man- I’m worried about the way you keep putting them in danger, he didn’t have to be out there- he wouldn’t have if you just talk to him,” Shane snarls between teeth.

“Oh, we’re doing this now?” he asks surprised, “okay- if you had any idea what is like to-”

“C’mon Rick, he had two walkers on his back- and a herd about to catch up with him-” he bites interrupting Rick’s thought.

Then his rushes speech stumbles between thoughts, “I do have an idea of how to take care of a family- that’s all I did for months and you keep acting like I didn’t- what happened happened, not tryin’ to excuse it- but I cared for them and I still do.”

“I know you do- but you don’t get what it is like to come back to- to- this,” Rick’s hand gestures slowly at the air, “everything changed and what, I just have to live with it? I have a say, no matter what happened between you two- I- what happens to them is up to me now.”

“I get it, brother- we all went through it and didn’t take us long to realize that we had to adapt- you’re hoping for everything to jump back to what it was- and it’s not going to- and it’s keepin’ you from seeing things how they are now.”

Then he storms out, to try the lookout point he settled in the mill. Laying low in the structure, he fixes his rifle, adjusting the scope- checking for who knows what.

In the middle of the day, when the rain has finally ceased- the little expedition party, that went out to the cottage to end the walkers, pull up by the other vehicles.

When Shane comes back, he finds Olivia in the tent sitting on her heels, half-changing clothes and tossing her dampen ones to a pile in the corner next to her boots. She greets him, turning to look at him zipping the door flap, while she picks up a towel to dry her hair over her shoulder.

“Everything went alright?”

“Yeah- well, we didn’t find anything- but didn’t had any major issues.”

Shane sits up all darken and cloudy as the weather on his cot.

“You okay?” she asks, shifting on her knees to look at him.

“Yeah- no, I-I had a day- I don’t-” scowling, he runs a hand over his chin, “ all better now-,” his eyes fixed on her body, “I’ll never get used to finding you like that,” he states with a quick smile.

“Oh- wasn’t this why you ask me to stay here?”

Clicking his tongue with his usual smug grin, “not at first.”

Shaking her head with a small laugh she tosses the towel at his head, blinding him, and climbs fast on his lap, with her shins on the coat and her ass pressed down on his thighs- when he pulls the fabric off his face she’s closer than expected. Feeling his cheeks blushing, he buries his face on her neck leaving a few kisses on her collarbone.

“Are you getting shy on me now, Walsh?” tilting her head a little amused, she licks her lips enjoying his little gesture of affection brushing all over her neck.

“Uh-Uh,” he breathes on her skin, locking his arms around her waist.

Her hands glide down his back to grab the hem of his shirt to pull it out over his head, with his help- he raises his arms and when is off she throws it to the side, then hands run down from the crown of his head to his neck, guiding his face up to her.

Tilting her head, she presses kindly on his upper lip with her mouth, giving a bit of a nibble, then does the same to the lower one. He smiles at the sweetness of her actions, and opens his mouth to invite her in.

His hands unclasp her bra at the back, and she lets it fall down to the side, while Shane’s hand soothes down to roam at the curve of her ass and pull her hips closer to him while she rolls her hips slowly.

She makes him so hard with just that.

While her tongue is quite focused on his mouth, softly turning around and pressing against his- one of his hands slides underneath her thigh, lifting her butt just a bit to play over her panties- his fingers playing tease on her make her hips press down aching for more friction as she latches onto his lip, biting a bit harder.

Taking a good hold on her ass, with no break from her lips, he lifts her up and carefully moves her body to lay her on the cot.

Settling between her thighs he gives a quick last lick to her lips, before wandering below to print a line soft kisses all over her torso- starting at her neck, his body crawls back to trail his way through her breasts, stopping a both peaks that harden seconds before meeting his eager tongue.

With a deep breath, her hand rests on his nape, following his every move while she holds her other one on the metal frame.

Reaching farther down, he blows softly on her stomach, barely brushing her skin that changes at the sensation, forming little bumps all over.

Glaring up to her, he sees her quietly enjoying with her eyes closed, and he continues to circle her navel, where he runs his teeth, barely scratching on the surface- and giving a few nips here and there.

His hands, roaming her hips, grab and remove her underwear slowly sliding them down her legs, as he plants a kiss over her knee before propping himself at the end of the cot, knees falling to the ground- and he drags her body down a little for a better reach.

Pushing one of her legs to the side, he traces her inner thigh with his lips, giving a few nibbles when he’s close to her sex. He hovers her pussy, and his tongue darts out to draw the line of her slit, making her slightly jolt.

She’s been wet for a while now and he’s been dying to taste her.

“Play nice, Deputy,” she whispers squeezing on his shoulder and quickly looking down at him.

“Always, sweetheart,” and he glances up to her with a naughty smile.

His fingers reach out to open her slicked flesh that gets warmer with every stroke. It doesn’t pass him by when her hips jerk a little, aching for him, and his tongue dives in to taste her clit, tracing a few long licks, he changes direction at the crest to draw a few circles before sucking on it.

Her grip tightens on the frame and she has to swallow a few moans when his lips pressed around those nerves and the tip of his tongue starts working in harmony.

She has to bite onto her lip, as the palm on his head digs its nails on his scalp.

He wants to reach down to take care of his own, as his cock flexes inside his pants, but he keeps his attention on her.

When her body begins squirming, arching lightly on her back as she gets closer to climax- he adds his fingers to the mix, burying two inside her slicked walls, pressing on the roof and twisting around.

Olivia drowns her moans deep down her throat, wincing as he goes faster- he has to pin that trembling leg that jolts out every other second to cage his head, with his arm firmly locked around it.

“Shane, ease up,” panting, he got her so close.

Pushing with her other hand on his head, “please,” she coils.

“Shane, fuck,” a choked gasp.

Then, only when her body strains and a barely held moan leaves her as she peeks orgasm that he lets her half go as he starts crawling over her, feeling her body quiver and heave under him.

Settling in between her, Shane leans on his forearms hovering over her face to softly press some kisses on her flustered face, over her jaw to whisper in her ear, “you taste like rain, darlin’” and nips her earlobe.  
Pressing her lips, embarrassed, she throws a hand over her eyes, “you don’t have to comment on it.”

“_You_ gettin’ shy on me now?” he chuckles repeating her words, pushing her hand out of the way, “see how close you got me,” as he rolls his hips slowly over her warm pussy.

Her fingertips raking over his ribs as he locks eyes with her, she reaches down to the waistband of his cargo pants, and she pushes him back when she’s recovered to take care of his belt, “take these off, Walsh.”

Between her legs, he gets on his knees, kicks off his boots that fall to the ground as she pulls his pants down. He reaches for a condom over the side table, “don’t you want me to return the favor?” she furrows palming his cock.

“Next time, sweetheart,” he bites on his lip, removing her hand to roll one on.

He finishes squirming out of his pants, and lays on top of her once more to fuck her.

Brushing his cock along her heat, he easily slides inside her, as her arms curl around his torso that is glued on hers with his mouth breathing on the crook of her neck.

Their hips wave together slowly to find the same rhythm, without viciously thrusting into her to avoid any noise. When they feel comfortable enough, he’s back on her mouth tasting her tongue anxiously.

Her walls feel so hot and tender from all his previous work, he has to hold on a little from coming too fast. Humming on her mouth, spacing his thrusts, stroking one hand on her thigh and using the curling the other under her head.

Parting for a moment, “don’t have to slow for me,” she lets him know palming his ass.

“You’re so fuckin’ hot,” he states going slightly faster, wincing.

As he goes right on the edge, urging her to finish, he increases the speed a bit more, as her hand moves in between them to reach for her clit.

His grip tightened on her leg, while his grunts echo on her mouth- pushing harder, he slams a bit harder on her ass- she’s almost there too, rubbing on herself, she feels all her juices flowing as her walls about to give up- contract on him in less than a second, she lets herself go for a second time, as her nails dig hard on his sides.

Shane mumbles her name, followed by quiet _darlin’_ as his stomach coils hollowing the space between them- he can’t control it anymore, his muscles strain and his cock twitches filling the latex barrier- then his body goes limp on top of hers.

Her mouth huffs, gulping of air, his body feels like a heavy soaked blanket covering her.

Soothing her fingers on his back, “you good?” she asks huskily low.

He takes a few seconds to reply, “yeah-” clearing his throat he rolls to the side, “so damn good, sweetheart.”

Turning to the side, she tucks her arms under her head as he gets rid of the condom and rests for a moment next to her, soothing his palm on her waist.

“You wanna know something?” Shane asks, curving his mouth.

“Sure.”

He didn’t give it much importance earlier but in that moment he feels like sharing that today it’s his birthday with her.

Smiling wishes him Happy Birthday, as she gets closer to sweetly kiss him quick, “I wanna say it’s August…. something, right?”

Vaguely nodding, “Ninth.”

**

Later in the day, when everyone is done with their task, as some stay on camp, the usual go on watch on different spots.

She’s with Shane tonight.

They sit on the wooden fence behind the farm after looping around a couple of times.

With no prospects of what might happen next. They banter slowly, as she chews on a piece of black licorice.

“You didn’t bring anything for me?”

Shrugging, she searches her pocket, “I have another twine and some gum,” she offers.

Taking a piece of gum, “you know I saw your stash, right?”

“Wow, you searched my bag? Did you have a warrant, _Officer_?” she accentuates his title with a little bit of mock.

Softening the piece of gum he quips right back, “technically is my tent, so I don’t need one.”

Her head shakes, amused, “okay, later you can have your pick- it’s your birthday after all.”

“Right on, I had my eye on the twinkie,” and he lifts his weapon to look through the scope.

“Dammit, not the twinkie,” she curses tilting her head back for a beat and then looking at where he’s pointing.

“Nothing,” putting his rifle down.

Then a cracked noise on the walkie, followed by the voice of Rick asking everyone on watch to go east to meet them.

Several minutes later, they meet with Rick, Daryl, Andrea, Glenn, T-Dog and Maggie.

When they arrived, the others had a kid, a teenager they don’t recognize, with instructions to lead them to a meeting place next to the creek.

They briefly interrogate him, pondering the possibility of being a trap.

“This ain’t right, Rick- we leave now and they take this place,” Shane states without keeping his eye off the kid, “how many of you?”

“Just a few, we mean no harm, and they - we- we don’t want the farm,” the kid swallows nervously.

“Rick?” Shane tilts his head, “you gotta make a decision, now- ”

“Okay-” he nods, “everyone knows their position, we go over like we talked- hear ‘em out, see if they got her.”

Shane starts tying the kid’s hands on his back and shutting his mouth with a piece of duct tape.

“Hey- hey, what are you doing?” Rick inquires.

“Making sure he doesn’t warn them when we arrive, man. This is nuts- going blindly in the middle of the night, pff,” he snarls annoyed.

The boy struggles but he stands no chance against Shane, that pushes him over to walk in front of him.

They all have a task they’ve gone over a few times before, as Rick and Shane take the lead on meeting with them, Glenn would take a vantage point on their position, hidden, he’d follow them after to see where they live.

Brennan and Daryl, follow several feet behind to cover Rick and Shane’s backs if needed.

While the others stay back at the farm.

**

As they’re arriving at the meeting point, they see a small clearing lit by a couple of flashlights tossed on the ground, Rick readies his weapon, as Shane shoves the barrel of his on the kid’s back.

“Hey, folks” says a young man with a sly smile, early thirties, waiting for them, lazily leaning on a tree with another three men next to him, all armed up.

Rick glances at Shane, on his side still holding onto the young man.

“Do you have her?” asks Rick.

“Yeah- We got her, girl’s fine-” the man paces around in a very soothing tone, “you can let Randall go now.”

“How do we know you got her?”

“Blonde hair, yeah high,” waving his palm down on the air, “-blue shirt with a rainbow, cries about her mom every night, every fuckin’ night-” he snaps in a mocking tone.

And Shane moves his rifle to aim at the boy’s head, “you say you mean no harm and you held a little kid hostage?”

“Fair enough- see, we don’t want her and I can tell you we haven’t harmed the girl in anyway- I’ve made sure of that.”

“Then what do you want?” Rick intercepts this time.

“Easy, we’re short on women so my men came up with a fair exchange- we want the two farmer girls, the other hot blond and the skinny one.”

One of the other men holding a rifle with a bad burn scar on his face loosens his posture to complain to their leader, “what? No way, Dave! we said Brennan.”

“Changed my mind, brother- she seems more troubling than the others,” he quickly glances at the man nodding at him to keep it together.

“Hey,” Shane yells stepping forwards with the boy as shield, “nobody is takin’ nobody- you’re gonna show us to the girl right now.”

“Can’t do that, man- I respond to all these men and those are their demands- if I don’t get them- then I won’t be able to protect the girl no more,” Dave states.

Rick cocks his gun, pointing at him, “what are you doin’ this?”

The man smugly grins, knowing he’s not gonna shoot as long as they have her, “Simple, the world has hit reset- now we get to live as it was, we haunt, they clean, they make us dinner when we come back and keep our beds warm.”

Shane and Rick look at each other, and Rick nods at Shane, with a slight furrow as he was asking him to trust him, “how long do we have?”

“A day from now, bring them to the cabin,” Dave sharply looks at Shane, “you know which one, and I’ll bring the girl to you,” he continues, “and don’t try to pull more shit-” then his hand goes up and shouts, “bring them up!”

Between the trees on their side, another group of 5 men appear holding Brennan, Daryl and Glenn hostage, hands bound and gags on their mouths. The men push the three of them down on their knees in the middle of the space.

Unclenched jaw, Shane pushes the boy aside to point at the new assholes. While Rick stays on Dave.

“We got people- we could just go and take them but I keep my word- we don’t want to harm anyone.”

The man with the scar steps out of his position to put his gun on Brennan’s head, “I’m not leaving here without her- she did this to me.”

Shane steps closer propping his riffle on that man’s face, snarling, “I’ll fucking kill you.”

It takes her a moment but then she realizes she knows that man, as her chin goes ups scowling, she mumbles his name behind the gag, “Sullivan?”

“That’s right, bitch- look what you did,” and he pushes his gun on her forehead.

“I swear to God, asshole-” Shane says between teeth, “put your weapon down.”

“Everyone calm down- this is not what we came for- Sullivan, go back in line,” Dave commands him, reluctantly, he goes back to his position, while Shane firmly holds his stance, aiming at him.

“Tomorrow, “ Dave says, covered by his men, “at any time, we have someone waiting, you do good and you’ll get the girl in one piece.”

Then, they all fade into the dark promptly, as Rick tries to follow- a shot rings out and a few walkers follow.

As Shane was ready to help the others, he has to leave them be to take care of the walkers, “fucking assholes,” he roughly says using a knife to stab two of them quickly.

When they’re gone, they help the three down stand up and take off their gags and zip ties on their wrists.

Shane undoes Brennan, and checks on her, all worried, “you alright, sweetheart?”

“Yeah, yeah-” she winces soothing over a mark left on her wrist, “sorry, we didn’t see them.”

“What are you apologizing for? They’re scumbags- it’s what they do.” Then he questions, Sullivan?”

“Fort Benning- he wasn’t like that before- I- I- the last day- the fire,” she stutters, “they took our weapons.”

“I know,” putting a hand on her back, “come on- let’s go back.”

**

The close circle stays away from camp trying to decide what to do.

“I’ll go, if that’s what they need for Sophia to come back- I’ll go,” Andrea bravely states.

“Calm down, no one is going anywhere,” Shane tells her.

“Why not? They don’t know what we can do and they’re just a bunch of bored rednecks-” and Brennan suggest, “I’ll exchange myself for Beth or Lori- and once she’s safe- the four of us can escape.”

“Stop- all of you,” Rick speaks, “I know where they are- we’ll get ‘em off guard and it’ll be our trap.”

Then he explains he saw a logo on the shirt of one of them that pointed out to a nearby private airport, “The Big T, saw it on the map- thought we should check it out at some point, first light tomorrow, just us. Everyone go rest, Dale is on watch.”

Once in the tent, Olivia lays on the ground draping a leg over the other, as Shane quietly sits staring at her, for a few minutes pass over uncomfortable.

“Did you always sign up for suicidal missions, Sergeant?”

“Shane,” she sighs at his name loudly with a hint of mock, then she slips a term of endearment for the first time, “it’s not suicidal, love. Told you this morning this is _what I am_, if you don’t like it-” her tongue clicks, “then you can go f-”

“Did you just call me _love_?” he cuts her short.

“Did I? I don’t think so,” shaking her head.

He crawls down to hover her, leaning on his forearms on each side of her head, “I’m gonna tell you something and you’re gonna listen for a minute,” he smiles.

“Depends on what you have to say.”

“Please,” he laughs for a moment before changing completely to a very serious expression.

Brushing her hairline with a thumb, he tells her low, “you’re strong, I know it- not tryin’ to keep you from anything- I just care that you’re safe that’s all, I know you don’t need me but- if I leave with you, I’m gonna need you in one piece- it’s all or nothing, that’s _what I am_\- I don’t do anything half-assed.”

“I don't do anything half-assed either,” locking eyes with him matching his tone, “wait- you’ve been thinking about coming with me?”

Nodding, “I know, it’s soon, too fucking soon-” he whispers, pressing his forehead with hers, “but I wanna be with you, Liv.”

Closing her eyes for a beat, she breathes deeply.

“Please say something,” he lifts his head up.

“I want that too Shane- I just don’t wanna keep you from- anyone.”

“Shit- are you kiddin’ me? You ain’t keepin’ me from anyone- if you’re thinkin’ of Lori, let me tell you... it wasn’t like this. I don’t know what it was- got caught in the idea of playin’ house back then but it wasn’t right,” he bluntly rants, “I was a need for her as much as she was for me- I kinda knew then and I’m sure of it know.”

“Okay,” she replies casually.

“Okay? I lay out everything for you and you just say _okay_?” he playfully smiles.

“I'm not good at this, you now it’s been a while since-” she admits in a small voice, “-but I’m crazy about you, Shane- I really am.”

“Okay,” he bites his lip before pressing a kiss on her forehead, then he moves to lay by her side as she settles her head on his arm, what it feels like the longest day weights heavier at this hour, as they just shut their eyes without really falling asleep, still concerned about how to handle the next day that has already sneaked up on them.


	10. Rainbow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a tad more graphic depicted than previous. It escalates through the series though, be aware of that.

Dark red blood slides down her left arm where the sharp end of a knife sticks out at the back of her upper arm. The rope around her wrists doesn’t make it any easier to keep going, she tries to bite on it once more- as her steps get slurred into a mud puddle where she collapses.

She manages to at least, in a last effort, to fall into her other side.

Eyes fighting to doze off, she keeps them open as much as she can as the last bits of sunshine turn the sky a nice shade of violet.

The soon-to-be-walker prying on her gets closer with every beat that sounds loud in her ears along with those curses at her name.

Her body slightly jolts, trying to move- to stand up but the little ounce of energy she has left only allows her to stay awake to live her final moments.

A tear slides down her face. Her vision gets blurry as her pulse races to the sight of those feet walking toward her.

Those mad sounds from the man that took her mix with her own heartbeat, like the worst final song she’d ever heard. Her mind doesn’t allow her to think of anything else. All her life, gone, like it never existed- she can’t remember or focus on a memory.

She’s so tired of fighting.

When her body goes numb all her muscles give up as they go limp.

Her lids close and the last thing she hears is something heavy falling next to her as her mind drifts away.

**

_A day from now,_ they said. Twenty hours they have.__

_ _At first light, all happens faster than they thought. As they were gathering on camp to come up with a plan, like Rick ordered- they noted he didn’t come back from his early sweeping along with Olivia, who went with him._ _

_ _The map is spread on T’s hands as they mark their way to the site they suppose those assholes are._ _

_ _Shane looks around a few times, they should’ve come by now. It was Rick’s idea and Olivia is always punctual when on duty._ _

_ _Some of them and packing things into cars in case they have to flee at a moment’s notice._ _

_ _Lori is carrying a yellow bag with food into the old station wagon when it drops out of her hands._ _

_ _“Rick!” she yells at his sight and everyone turns to look._ _

_ _He’s running, staggered, passing the fence and crossing the field with someone in his arms._ _

_ _A child._ _

_ _When he’s close enough, he puts her down, as they recognize Sophia that starts sprinting faster than Rick._ _

_ _Carol is by the RV when her feet involuntarily start to move, running to her little girl._ _

_ _They meet under everyone’s eyes in the middle of the field._ _

_ _She holds her up, the kid feels heavier, so Carol falls to her knees without breaking from her. Crying her eyes out, both of them while the others give them a moment taking a step back around mother and child._ _

_ _Relieved. They all get that fresh breath of air they’ve been lacking for the last few days._ _

_ _Carl is next in hugging Sophia, and they all get teared up as they welcome the little girl to the group._ _

_ _When it comes to Shane, he kneels down and gives her a warm welcoming hug as she says to him, “she said, gum- you can have all the gum.”_ _

_ _His brow furrows, then he stands back up to look at Rick, “where is she?”_ _

_ _Drenched in sweat, Rick looks down with sorrow- hand on his hip and with her other he scratches his chin over his scruff, “this morning-” he starts explaining as he looks back up to stare at his friend, “we were near The Thompson’s house when that guy from last night- Sullivan, the one with the-” and a hand hovers over his own face, “he- he was alone- said he had her, Sophia- and that-”_ _

_ _“What Rick?” he snarls knowing already where this is going, nostrils flaring, his hand rubs on his head, “what the fuck did you do?”_ _

_ _“Hey-” Lori scolds him, “let’s get them out of here first,” as she and Carol take the kids away._ _

_ _“He wanted her, Olivia, in exchange for Sophia- he wasn’t with the others, said he took the kid and broke from the group and that- that he only wanted her- she-” he stutters._ _

_ _“And you let her? Two against one, Rick- shit-” he can’t even understand how could he let that happen._ _

_ _“He had her locked up, Shane. What do you want me to do? It was the only way- and she said-”_ _

_ _“I know what she said,” his head shakes, tilting slightly, as his upper lip twitches in anger- then he walks up to the RV to retrieve all his weapons._ _

_ _Promptly stepping into the vehicle, he gets the bag and grabs his handgun to load it up and holsters it on his belt. Then his rifle._ _

_ _Rick climbs in, following his every step._ _

_ _He calls his name a few times, as Shane continues his way- “think, man- they’re coming here once they realize we already got Sophia, we have to get these people out of here,” says Rick calmly, something bothers Shane even more, “she-” he stops putting a hand up to stop Shane from walking out, “Olivia, she can handle-”_ _

_ _“Pfff- she’s with that asshole because of you-” he bites, “now you care about these people?”_ _

_ _Now he has everything ready to go, his chin sharply goes up motioning to the door, “let’s go.”_ _

_ _“Where?” asks Rick confused._ _

_ _“Man, you’re taking me where you last saw her- start walking.”_ _

_ _His friend doesn’t move, he just stares at him for a few seconds, “Shane- they need us here.”_ _

_ _“Start walking,” he orders again._ _

_ _And he doesn’t._ _

_ _His rifle goes up aiming at him for a second time as his jaw clenches, “not gonna ask again.”_ _

_ _Rick's hand goes up, mid-way, “okay- okay- I’ll take you there.”_ _

_ _The weapon doesn’t go down- Rick gets out of the RV backwards minding the steps._ _

_ _“The car- we’ll go faster,” Shane points out with the barrel to the green Hyundai._ _

_ _Rick turns around and walks slowly to the vehicle leaving the weapon at his back._ _

_ _“Shane! What are you doing?” Lori yells, walking fast towards them._ _

_ _“He’s takin’ me to her- he’ll be back.”_ _

_ _“So, you’re just takin’ him hostage? This is how you do things now?” she questions trying to stop him grabbing his shirt._ _

_ _“It’s okay, Lori- he’s just making a point.”_ _

_ _“Yeah, keep tellin’ yourself that- get in,” says Shane when approaching the car._ _

_ _Before he can turn around to get into the passenger seat, another feeble attempt of stopping him in the form of a rifle pokes him in the middle of his back._ _

_ _“Dale-” he huffs, “come on, take the shot old man,” he almost mocks._ _

_ _“You’re out of control, son,” Dale tells him low, “if you wanna leave- go ahead but he’s not-”_ _

_ _“Please- Dale- all of you” pleasing old Rick interjects trying to keep everybody happy, “he’s right- this started ‘cause of me- I’ll be a few hours, just keep packing- if anything happens or just feel like you should go- we’ll meet at the houses, ‘kay?”_ _

_ _They reluctantly let him get away with it, as Rick drives Shane keeps flashing daggers at him all the way._ _

_ _On the way Rick explains to him, how he had her locked up in a car hidden in the woods, as the man- Sullivan pried around the farm until he found an opening with them while they were making an early round around the fence._ _

_ _He said she, Olivia, either go with him or the girl would die otherwise._ _

_ _Knowing Brennan, she didn’t hesitate in taking that offer._ _

_ _“The gum- what she said about the gum?” Shane asks._ _

_ _“I don’t know- I- she said it to Sophia-”_ _

_ _“Think she was tellin’ you without _tellin’ you_?”_ _

_ _“Could be-”_ _

_ _“How exactly did she say it?” he wonders, trying to piece the puzzle together, she wouldn’t have said something so odd to a girl she just met without meaning._ _

_ _Something was clearly on her mind when she willingly let herself get taken._ _

_ _“As we were leaving- the guy stood there tying her wrists and looping a wire on her fingers- as-”_ _

_ _“Shit-” he curses turning on his seat, “can’t believe you, man- or her- she just-”_ _

_ _“Look- I don’t like it either but she seemed like she knew what she was doin’- as we were walking away she called Sophia’s name and told her- _tell Shane he can have all the gum_\- I looked back and she nodded.”_ _

_ _Getting as close as they can get with the car, and walk the rest of the way to the woods._ _

_ _Once in place, Rick shows him around- where he had her and they pick up a trail- it doesn’t take him long to know what she was talking about- he finds a small piece of pink paper from a gum wrapper purposely thrown in the way, followed by the print of her sole._ _

_ _Shane crouches down and picks the little crumb she left for him and continues to follow the trail._ _

_ _

_ _**_ _

_ _

_ _In the farm, they keep watch as Carol, overjoyed, looks closely over Sophia and Carl, who can’t get away from her friend._ _

_ _She’s been well fed- not so well cleaned as Carol handles her new clothes and gets her thoroughly cleaned up._ _

_ _The girl doesn’t talk much, she seems out of place and a stranger to this new situation but happy to be back with her mom._ _

_ _When she’s cleaned up she sits at the table with her friend. They share an orange while Carl puts her up to date with everything that’s been happening, they boy shows her his scar on his shoulder as if it was something to be proud of._ _

_ _

_ _**_ _

_ _

_ _“What are you gonna do with me?” panting, with a hand pushing at her back, she trades lightly with something between her restricted fingers, trying to distract him from seeing her going all Hansel & Gretel, with her own breadcrumbs version._ _

_ _“Same thing you did to me- worst,” he points out._ _

_ _She quips, ripping another piece slowly, “is that a promise?” and leaves it falling at her feet._ _

_ _The man is too busy running in the other direction of his _friends_ that he doesn’t realize what she’s doing, “keep walking- we’re almost there,” he rushes her pushing her back once more._ _

_ _“Couldn't' help but notice you didn’t bring your friends.”_ _

_ _“Those weren’t friends- just a means to an end.”_ _

_ _“What? They hurt your feelings?” smugly, she tries to get a rise out of him._ _

_ _Huffing, “said I could have you- I mean shit I found you- all of you, the farm what y’all were doin’- and what do I get?”_ _

_ _“So you didn’t like it back at the old big T?” she cleverly questions to verify that’s where the rest are._ _

_ _“Was okay- until they turned on me.”_ _

_ _As they walk for a long time, every mile or so a tiny piece falls down. She attempts a few times of slowing him down, claiming she’s tired- for the others to catch up with her- it’s been hours, and she wonders if he got the message- even if they didn’t she’s sure that Shane would follow either way after what he confessed to her last night._ _

_ __I’m gonna need you in one piece. It’s all or nothing._ He said to her._ _

_ _Smiling to herself, she focuses on his words- hoping he’s not far behind- she remembers the way he called her Liv, like no one has ever done before, so warmly._ _

_ _Her foot _accidentally_ trips on a large rock and throws herself to the ground as she winces when her shoulder hits the floor._ _

_ _He points her own at her, “get up.”_ _

_ _“Okay- just a second,” she makes her own way of bending up as slowly as possible, and Sullivan’s patience is null- he grabs her by the hair and yanks her back up._ _

_ _“Stop playing, bitch,” and shoves the barrel right on her face as her hair falls down messed up all over her face._ _

_ _Panting, with her scalp hurting for the pull, her stare stays defiant with no flinch at his threats._ _

_ _“You’re pathetic,” she mumbles._ _

_ _“I’m pathetic? We had a good thing going at ‘Benning- we coulda been safe by now- they said-” he says between teeth, pressing harder the barrel to leave a mark on her face._ _

_ _“They said what? That they had a safe place? Bullshit- all lies- you think they cared about us- about the world- about any of those people they took in?” she states fast, voice raising, “they didn’t give a shit, Sullivan- the dropped bombs- killed healthy people, have you been to any of those FEMA places? Huh?” she wonders, “they killed all of them.”_ _

_ _“We had orders.” He lowers his gun and forces her to start walking again._ _

_ _“We did. Protect our people. They turned on us, Sullivan.” She tries to reason with him._ _

_ _“Don’t matter now- when I’m done with you- shit- I’m gonna burn every inch of your pretty skin until there’s nothing left.”_ _

_ _“Do what you gotta do, Private,” she shakes her head- “Shit- up ahead.” She points out at a couple of walkers coming their way and her feet stop._ _

_ _She sees an opening as he passes her by, “stay there,” he says- but as soon as his back is turned on her- her feet start moving fast the opposite direction, looping through different trees as she tries to get rid of the copper wire on her fingers with not success._ _

_ _He’s facing the walkers about to shoot when he hears her footfalls behind him._ _

_ _Ignoring the walkers, he immediately follows her._ _

_ _She stops for a second, shielding her body behind the biggest tree she could find while she catches her breath._ _

_ _At the sound of dragged feet haunting her, she starts running again._ _

_ _With the rope left around her wrists, she half chomps on it as her feet keep moving._ _

_ _Her head turns back once, really quickly- there’s nothing left behind her._ _

_ _With eyes all over, she trips on her feet again, this time not at her own volition._ _

_ _As she gets up, Sullivan comes a-running and tackles her, pinning her down on her back as he drives a knife through her arm- with no effort he easily pierces her skin until the sharp point hits the ground._ _

_ _The shooting pain running through her arm, makes her let out a choked scream that only serves to draw the walkers closer to them._ _

_ _He was so focused on hurting her that he doesn’t realize one of them is closer than he thought._ _

_ _At his back, one of the roamers gets to him and bits at his bare neck before he can do anything._ _

_ _He quickly pushes it back, as a hand runs bloody at the touch of his neck. He starts yelling and cursing and he kicks Brennan's ribs._ _

_ _Her muscles strain as some tears start pooling on the corner of her eye._ _

_ _While he takes care of the two dead, she clumsily stands up as the blood starts flowing down through the edge of the blade stuck on her bicep._ _

_ _Out of air, grimacing- she goes as fast as she can under the circumstances._ _

_ _She doesn’t know how much time she has until he catches up with her again._ _

_ _

_ _**_ _

_ _

_ _Takes them longer than they thought, as the sun is about to set- Rick and Shane find two dead walkers on the trail and a pool of blood nearby._ _

_ _With Rick on his back, they follow the drops of blood, striding fast- his mind set on finding her dead already- _she can’t be,_ he thinks desperately, _not her, not her, please._ He almost pleads to God in his mind._ _

_ _He thinks he’s found here- he sees the silhouette of man in the distance standing over a body- he sprints to them and hits the man with the back of his rifle he hits him over his head._ _

_ _Oh, shit- he thinks she’s dead._ _

_ _“No, Liv- please,” he says hoarse as he lets go of his rifle to fall on his feet._ _

_ _He crouches next to her, cupping her mud covered face- he checks her pulse on her neck, it’s beating- slowly but it’s beating._ _

_ _“Liv- wake up,” he whispers, assessing her injured arm and making sure she’s not bit._ _

_ _Then he takes the blue rag from his pocket and wraps it on her arm to secure the knife from sliding out. After, he takes his own knife and cuts the bind on her wrists._ _

_ _Rick takes his friend’s rifle from the ground and Brennan’s gun under the man’s limb laying at his feet._ _

_ _“What do you want to do with him?” Rick points to Sullivan._ _

_ _His face turns to see the bit on his neck, “He’s bit- let him turn,” he states roughly._ _

_ _When he’s done checking and tying the fabric on her, he carefully picks her body up in his arms, with no help she feels like dead weight already._ _

_ _

_ _**_ _

_ _

_ _When her eyes open is day again as the striking sun rays entering the window blind her. She doesn't recognize the place, the surface on her back is softer than usual- way too soft, it feels like a cloud. There's an egg-white sheet covering her almost naked body. For a moment, even if she doesn’t have much belief in the after- her mind tricks her to think it’s either a dream or some kind of weird heaven._ _

_ _Nothing hurts now, not her arm or her side where he kicked her. She only feels the drowsiness of it all._ _

_ _After a couple of minutes, when her head clears a bit she realizes that place is one of the rooms at the farm._ _

_ _Her arm is all wrapped-up in a clean bandage, and there’s an IV injected in her other._ _

_ _When her face turns, she sees the door slightly cracked open. She tries to speak but no sound comes out of her dry throat._ _

_ _Her hand reaches for the glass water at the side table and a jolt of pain awakens a nerve on her shoulder to stop her from doing so._ _

_ _Thinking she’s gone deaf, no sound of anyone around makes its way to her ears._ _

_ _Pushing through the pain, she goes for the glass again and nudges it silly off the table._ _

_ _Good, the glass smashing on the wooden floor awakens her hearing._ _

_ _It sets someone off to check on her. It’s Beth, “you’re awake,” she says softly staring at her._ _

_ _“Sophia?” she mumbles with a raspy voice._ _

_ _“She’s okay,” Beth takes a towel from the suite bathroom and kneels down carefully to pick the pieces of broken glass._ _

_ _“Shane?”_ _

_ _“He was just outside- been here all night with you,” says the girl standing up with the towel loosely folded on her hands, “I’ll tell him you’re up.”_ _

_ _She slowly nods from the bed and asks for water before Beth leaves._ _

_ _Not a minute after, his heavy gait makes its way through the hallway to the room where she’s at._ _

_ _With a new glass of water on his hand, Shane sits on the edge of the bed- a crease on his brow, lips pressed- he uses his free hand to cup her face as she lifts her head a bit to drink from the glass._ _

_ _“Still in one piece,” she says after clearing her throat._ _

_ _He settles the glass on the table, with a hand hovering over the bandage, “barely, look at that nasty cut.” _ _

_ _She bends her elbow, with her lazy hand up searching for his, “knew you’d come after.”_ _

_ _Shaking his head, trying to maintain a serious stance he takes her hand and laces it with hers, “you and your piece of shit breadcrumbs, Hansel.”_ _

_ _“That’s the boy,” she laughs, soundless._ _

_ _His head hangs down, “when I saw you- I thought-”_ _

_ _Squeezing his hand, “I know- I did too.”_ _

_ _She tries to sit up a bit, to lean on the headboard, wincing, “hey- look at me,” he blinks a few times without looking, “I’m fine, she’s fine- that’s all that matters. Okay?”_ _

_ _With half a smile, his face turns to her, “okay.”_ _

_ _“What happened after? What about those guys?” she inquires._ _

_ _Tilting for a beat, “Rick just went to reason with them- said he’d offer half of our food to leave us alone.”_ _

_ _“Doesn’t seem really smart- we should just bolt- go to the houses- or farther.”_ _

_ _“He doesn’t care, Liv. He has this idea- look, we’re done here, as soon as you’re better, you and me- we take our chances out there- I’m gonna take you home, you hear me?” and then he continues, “If anyone wants to come great- if they don’t, that’s fine too,” then he leaves a small kiss on her forehead, “is that okay with you?”_ _

_ _With eyes welling up, her chin goes down once, agreeing with him, “you’ve been really thinking about it, huh?” says Liv after swallowing._ _

_ _”You know, I thought of leaving before you came along. This group is broken- it’s been for a while.”_ _

_ _He plays softly with her fingers, looking down, “you never told me where we’re going.”_ _

_ _“Rocky Mount."_ _

_ _Pausing for a moment to think, “It's far but we can make it,” he states already planning how to get there._ _

_ _“You think?”_ _

_ _“Think? I know so- you and me- we’re golden,” he smiles softly at her before placing a kiss on the back of her hand._ _

_ _She rests for half a day after, while Shane keeps busy watching over the farm with Rick gone._ _

_ _Olivia meets Sophia officially in the afternoon, she and Carol come by the room and sit with her for a while. The girl doesn’t talk much, not sure if she was just shy before but she can recognize the shock of all those days alone without her family._ _

_ _In the evening, she’s finally up, just enough to get to their tent- when the medicine is wearing down, the kick that asshole let on the side of her ribcage that shines a dark purple now sends a shooting pain as she settles her body down._ _

_ _She can barely move her arm, at least it wasn’t her good one._ _

_ _Shane makes sure those stitches stay well clean and cared for underneath the bandages and suggests- no, he has to force her to rest some more._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And Sophia lives. I really didn't want to kill her and she lives in the comics so I thought I could use that.


	11. Snafu

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one features big chunks from the episode '2x07 Pretty Much Dead Already' to make up for my badly written angst scenes, which I don't regret cause Shane had some pretty good moments on that episode.

When he walks into that small space they’ve made theirs, he attempts to park outside all that it’s eating him inside, everything that she's missed when she was in and out.

Tough, it still follows into that tent.

Hoping she was already asleep, he finds her wide awake laying on her back back on that side of the tent that was only hers a few weeks ago. 

“Hey.”

Closing the flap behind him, he tries to hide all his troubles by only gazing at her from the corner of his eye, focusing on something else at hand, even hitting that dimmer on light on the side table- it’s not enough to mask it off his features.

“Hey.” She watches him, nudging off his boots as he slips out of his button up shirt at once with his back on her. Observing the position of his shoulders bending in tiredness as he lets his shirt fall to the cot on the side. Then he undoes his belt and steps out of his pants.

“Still not liking my cot, huh?” he says low.

She’s tried the cot but her injured arm has met a few times that metal frame making her curse several in the middle of the night.

“Nope.”

He crouches down and checks her upper arm covered in a new dressing before laying down by her side, before leaning on an elbow, head hovering over her face while his opposite hand soothes her cheek down to her neck, “You good?”

A quick nod, “Um-hum. Are you?”

He sighs with a tilt as his eyes close for a few seconds, “just tired,” he brushes off.

While her wounded limb bends over her stomach, she relies on the other to reach at his nape, pulling softly his head down to her, his lips end up nuzzling her nose making her draw a shy smile.

He tilts until his lips meet with hers.

Holding that urge of kissing her with passion, he gently brushes on them- placing a couple of pecks on the corner or her mouth, sliding softly to the middle where he leaves another.

Lips drawing her mouth with small caresses up to the other corner to start all over again while she lets him take the lead, enjoying every little affection he offers and how focused and calm he’s on her right now, feels like the most comforting thing she’s had in awhile.

When he’s ready, he licks his lips and a thumb moves to brush over her bottom lip, asking her to open. Kissing that finger, she opens, inviting his tongue that slowly dives in, tenderly massaging her, with no twist or curl or need for fight from any of them like they’ve been used to.

The tartness of the peach she had minutes ago still lingers on her mouth and it jumps right into his taste buds, stirring a hum from his throat.

Amazed by his dexterity and determination of distracting her just enough, she already knows it’s half-want half-plot of getting her to rest some more.

“I know what you’re doing, Walsh,” she whispers, breaking slightly from his lips.

“‘Course you do, smartass,” he huffs giving a nip on her upper lip, “can’t fool you for a second, can I?”

“You could- but you’re not trying hard enough.”

Letting out a laugh, “that so?”

“I mean if you were on top of me I’d be more open to being fooled,” she raises a brow, shrugging silly just her good shoulder.

His head shakes nuzzling her cheek with the tip of his nose, “Darlin’, you couldn’t handle me right now.”

A palm glides down her side to her ribcage, without even pressing, she winces at his touch, where she was kicked two days ago, with small jolt to the side, “ah- asshole.”

Quickly drawing it to cup at her jaw, he grins, “just sayin’.” 

“So, are you ever gonna tell me what's going on out there? Hear a lotta talking today,” she wonders as her arm stretches to smooth at his buzz cut.

Ducking his head down to bury his face on her collarbone, her arm falls with it to curl around his neck.

“Shane, you know you can tell me anything,” she breathes on his ear.

Twisting his lips, he lifts his head with a sigh trying to determine the level of gravity of all the things she’s not fully aware of yet. “There’s a lot goin’ on, Liv, I don’t want to worry you.”

“Figured that much, but I’m fine, Shane- been here cooped up all day, I wanna know.”

A hesitant shake of his head, that hangs back down for a second, “okay.”

After a few seconds, he lays out everything she’s missed, starting the day she was taken- recounting how he aimed and threatened Rick that day in front of everyone. 

“You didn't have to do that for me.”

“Course I had, Liv. He was willing to let you fend for yourself, wouldn't have found you if I didn't- shit, a minute later and you’d be dead, I- I couldn’t let that happen- if-”

Then he can’t leave the other part out about the first time he aimed at Rick’s back when they were still at the quarry, his features go tougher as he shows that side of him that makes him lash out like that at his own best friend.

She breathes a loud huff, trying to understand.

“You don’t get it,” he says with a crease between his eyebrows.

“I’m trying...”

Staring at her a little harsher than earlier, “he’s putting everyone at risk- we’ve lost to many people since he came back. Because of him you ended up with that asshole-”

He continues rambling in anger as his voice raises just a little, “last night he met with those dirtbags, tsk- like they’re gonna stay away cause he gave them some food and said _please_, how long you think that’s gonna last?”

Swallowing hard all the information she pleads at his name.

“I had to, Liv- I fucking had to.”

Lifting his body to sit , a hand runs through his head before placing both elbows on his bended knees.

“There’s more, isn’t it?”

He nods, “not that it matters now, but Dale asked me to leave- said there’s no place for me no more, old man think he knows about Otis too”

Ignoring her injury, she winces bending up fast to sit in front of him

“How? I didn’t say-”

“I know you didn’t.” He curses, as he keeps piling more shit. 

“I think has to do with your gun, see someone went through our stuff when I went lookin’ for you… they found your gun because of me.”

“What? who?”

“They think it’s mine- don’t worry about it.”

“Shane- I do worry. You’re taking a lot of shit for me- you shouldn’t have to,” she reaches with her fingers up to his jaw, nudging softly on his stubble to find his lost stare.

He takes her hand with his thumb brushing at her banged up knuckles, “It’s fine, I deserved it- what I’ve done- pointing at Rick, that night at the school- wasn’t my finest but it had to be done, what’s one more thing? Better me than you, babe.” 

With a head shake, “uh, uh.”

“You did a lot of good too-” she reminds him, “you kept this group safe since the beginning- Glenn told me about it,” she has to point out as Shane hasn’t told her much about before.

“Carl is safe because of you- and despite being an asshole about it, you went farther than any of them to search for Sophia… and Rick- fuck him! he’s breathing cause of you too. It should count- it does by me.”

Breathing loudly, he leans to prop his forehead over hers.

“Do you feel unsafe without it?” he asks, “the gun?”

“Not really, didn’t keep it to feel safe. Well, maybe at first when I was-”

“Alone-” he finishes her thought, “and you didn’t know us.”

Nodding, she feels the pull of everything he just told her sinking deep into her stomach as she swallows hard.

Shane opens his arms to a cuddle and she settles his good side on his chest, closing her eyes, breathing on his skin for a beat .

“It’s just another tool really- faster in a pinch,” she adds, soothing a palm on his ribcage.

“And the difference between life and death,” Shane remarks, still a little annoyed at not knowing who would dare to go through their stuff.

Clearing her throat she questions, “you still wanna go?”

His finger tapping softly at her back, “you worried I’ve changed my mind?”

“Maybe.” She admits with hesitation, “It was a crazy day when you said- what you said.”

“I fucking meant it. Not take backs, Liv- just waiting for you to get better- if I knew how to properly care for that-” he points at her arm, “we’d be outta here already.”

Speechless, she swallows that lump of unsaid words stuck in her throat.

Finding his hand she laces fingers with him and brings it up to her mouth as she can only respond with a kiss at the back of his hand, hoping that’s enough for now.

Eyes fixed on her, “You good with that?” 

“Yeah,” she smiles shyly, “it’s fucking perfect, Shane.”

Cradling the back of her neck, twining fingers on her locks, her lids fall dozing off in his arms, he guides her body to the ground where he watches over her until she’s finally out.

Shane can’t find his own sleep, he twists and turns several times. Sitting, pacing, sipping some water- he wants to wake her up but he doesn’t.

For roughly an hour, he gets some shut-eye after midnight.

When he breathes awake again, his restless mind goes through all of it again.

Unsettled, he places a kiss on her forehead, puts his clothes on and goes to do a swipe around the property before sunrise.

**

Brennan wakes up to loud voices from outside, startled and drenched in sweat- she picks up the water bottle to take a big gulp and grimaces at the warmness of the liquid that doesn’t have an ounce of refreshment.

Her arm strains at her belly, it really hurts now but she slips into her jeans as quickly as it allows her- sitting on the cot, one leg at a time, tugging each leg until both cuffs are covering her ankles. Before pulling them up to her hips, she pushes her feet into her boots before standing up to fully yank them on sloppily with one hand.

She pushes her hair back stepping out of the tent to one of the brightest days on the farm, blinded, she glances towards the barn where a few of them are clearly arguing, Shane’s voice carries but she can’t make out the words.

When she’s mid-way through that field, to the forbidden structure they were told to stay away- the striking rage in Shane’s tone echoes louder in her ears- he’s questioning Rick why the hell are they still doing here.

“What do you have to figure it out? huh? After those assholes, now this- wake up, Rick!”

Rick holds a hand up asking him to calm down, “this is his land, if we’re gonna clear this barn, I have to talk him into it.”

“Unbelievable” moving his hands, palm to palm, in a desperate plea to his face , “been here all this time with- with-” he releases a finger in the air to gestures at the barn, “those things- man’s crazy if he thinks they’re people- we got Sophia, let’s keep moving. Let him have it.

And he continues, “now ‘Benning is out of the question but we can secure the houses Liv and I found- they’re sittin’ there for the takin’.”

Rick hangs his head down, “I’ll think about it.”

“Yeah, you do that.” His head strains to the side.

The wooden doors get pushed from the inside and he turns reaching at his belt to grab his missing weapon.

As a silent snarl takes his mouth, roughly turning back at his former partner, “those doors ain’t gonna hold forever, man.”

Taking off, he fixes his cap and meets Oliva in the middle of the field. While the group breaks back to camp.

Shane slightly flinches when she presses her fingers on his forearm.

“Shane,” she breathes low, searching for his eyes under that blue cap.

Takes him a few seconds to adjust his eyes from darting all over the place. 

“What the hell just happened?” she inquires

“Hershel’s been keepin’ walkers right here- thinks they’re people. Man’s crazy, Liv.” 

“That’s batshit crazy,” she gazes at the barn and back to him, wondering how nobody’s noticed all this time. “What do you wanna do?”

“Take our guns, kill ‘em all” he says curtly, before motioning his head back, suddenly striding back to the structure to check the locks.

She tries to remain calm, as much as she’d like the same, they can’t just go guns-a-blazing in a place that doesn’t belong to them.

“Okay, let’s check the locks, make sure it stays like that for now.”

Agreeing with her, they both go around making sure every opening is firmly secured. The rotters shift and growl inside at their passing, sneaking fingers between the wooden planks. The place is barely holding on, a few chains and padlocks are not gonna keep them inside much longer if they keep bringing more.

Still unsettled, Shane decides to watch over the place from an old tractor laying on the side of the barn.

“Go back, please. I'll be over later.” He utters propping his butt on the old vehicle.

“Shane- you don’t have to do that, let’s just bounce- why does it matter?”

“Pff- you from all people? Why does it matter?” he mimics annoyed,clenching his hand on the metal.

Furrowing, her head leans slightly with a deep sight, hearing him going on a bitter rant.

“So, you’re cool now after finding Sophia, leaving her and Carl here with those rotters.” Nodding once, pegging her with a sharp look.

And he keeps going, “yeah, you are, that’s what you do- you just leave everyone behind when you see fit- like you did at the base.”

“Go to hell! That’s- that’s not what I meant and you know that. I meant everyone,” she snaps between teeth, without even raising her tone.

“Shane, come on! You really think I’d do that?” as everything starts to hurt, not just his words, she clenches her good arm over the one that’s killing her.

Masking a pain grunt behind the cracks on her voice, she words out the thing that’s been bothering her for a while.

“I’ve kept my mouth shut for weeks- I lied for you and the first chance you get- you dig at me cause people don't listen to you?”

“Liv-” shaking his head realizing how far he’s gone, “I- I-”

“You what, Shane? you better than anyone know how hard that was- tell me, is that really what you think of me?”

Feeling like an asshole, as a hand drags over his face, he nudges that cat up when rubbing two fingers on his eyes.

“Fuck, I’m sorry- Liv- that’s not what-” 

Her brow creases, “I am the only one on your side right now, you get that, right?”

He nods, swallowing with difficulty.

Pushing her feet forward, determined to go back to camp she stops by his side first to tell him low, “I know you’re angry and tired- we all are but you cant-”

“Liv.”

“You can’t go postal like that every time something upsets you. Not at them and not at me, Shane.”

Lacking other words he keeps pleading at her name.

Then her feet start moving but he freezes on the spot.

Torn apart between following her or watching the barn. As she gets farther, he holds his head down, gripping both hands on the side of the tractor- wanting to tear the whole thing apart. He breathes a few curses with tears building up as his fist clenches to punch the big tire.

“Shit!”

**

She has to sit immediately without even finishing that walk to the tent, taking a seat on a stump as she gets dizzy at the acute pain on her upper arm.

“Are you okay?” someone asks her.

Looking to the side she finds Carol staring down, “here.”

Carol hands her a sling made out of a worn out shirt, “I know it’s not much but I thought you might need that. Keep it still at least.”

“Thanks,” she places the piece of fabric over her lap, “it’s not that though- I got up so quickly, I forgot to take the painkiller and the antibiotics,” she huffs in pain.

“Shit of a day, huh?” she hears Carol cursing for the first time.

She crouches down by her side and softly holds her arm, unwrapping the bandage, “looks fine to me but you should check in with Hershel just in case.”

“I- I’ll do that.”

“Everything okay?” asks Olivia.

“Yeah. No, I don’t wanna- maybe later.” She brushes off clearly bothered by something.

“It’s fine,” with her good hand drapes the sling over her neck, stopping for a beat before getting her arm in.

“You've done so much for us already, you don’t have to, but I need you to teach me how to shoot- Sophia too,” she states with confidence, “Andrea’s been showing me the mechanics and I wanted to ask Shane, but he and Rick right now… and I don’t want to have to rely on them all the time.”

“Yeah, I’ll do it-” she agrees, “say when.”

“In an hour? Andrea and us. Figured we could take a drive.”

“Just us girls, huh?”

Carol nods, pressing a smile, “thank you.”

**

Feeling a little better, physically at least, she gathering some weapons for them to practice and gets ready to leave, hesitating on whether to tell Shane or not. 

First, she lets Glenn know where they’re going, then she walks up to that field where Shane stands unmovable from his position, like a guard dog fixated on that damn barn.

“Do you think now it’s the best time to do that?” Shane questions with a quick glance to the side.

“I do, Shane. Everything is falling apart and they need to learn,” she states standing a few feet apart observing his fidgety fingers playing with his blue cap, “you could come with us, you know?”

“I- I gotta stay here, I can’t go knowing what’s in there.”

“Okay- I’ll see you later, I guess.” She mumbles turning around.

“Hey, Liv?”

Her head looks back, “Yeah?” 

Locking eyes with her. “I’m sorry about before- it was uncalled for, I know you ain’t like that.”

With a long sight, she tsks her tongue, "when you think about it, you don’t know me all."

“I think I know enough. I know there’s a part of you that you hate and you use your _okays_ and your funny remarks to- to avoid gettin’ real with me sometimes.”

“I guess you got me, Shane, what can I say? I’m an asshole,” she breathes pushing her hair back, as her eyes lazily roll more annoyed at herself for coming back for more than anything else.

“Tell me that I’m not making this up. Say what you really want from me if we leave, I said my piece before- you haven’t.”

“I have, Shane.”

“No, babe, see- you just agreed with me, you didn’t say shit.”

“I- I can’t do this now. I gotta go, they’re waiting for me.” She swallows pointing with her thumb behind her.

“My point exactly,” he mumbles in frustration, clasping on the cap between his hands.

“You know, I walked up here to let you know where I was goin’ so you didn’t worry- and you turn an apology into a guilt trip? Fuck you, Walsh.” She brushes him off before marching her way.

On the dirt road by the fence’s gate they’re waiting for her in the car. Climbing into the passenger seat, with Andrea behind the wheel and Carol in the back with Sophia, off they go to that same place they used only that day for practice shooting.

**

After showing mom and daughter how to shoot, they get to practice over some targets placed far away on the edge of the fence. Andrea stays with Carol and she gets a quick hold of it, even when she doesn’t hit the target, but after some directions from Andrea she gets a bullseye.

Sophia gets really focused, with Brennan at her side, wanting to get it right, she takes her time before firing.

Slipping out her new sling, she pushes her arm to hold the little girl’s hands to anticipate the kickback of that first shot. Then a second time. When she’s ready, Olivia takes a step back and watches her safely getting into position to do it by herself. She doesn’t hit the target but it does carve a few holes in the fence.

“You’ll get there,” she reassures her, “but that was a great start.”

Olivia also teaches them some basic tactical moves. Inputting on trust on each other, how to watch over their backs and the people around them, other ways to end walkers, what to do if they get surrounded, when to shoot and when to run if needed to.

“There’s no shame in it, if you think that you can’t make the shot- you find an opening and you run and hide, anything you can find you use to your advantage.”

“I see only Andrea has a knife and she can tell you skulls are harder than you think.”

“That’s right- you’d think they’d rot like the rest of them but they don’t.” Andrea adds.

“Now, if you don’t have a gun at hand- you take a knife or the hardest thing you can find and stick it through the soft spots- eyes,” and she points under her chin, “right here, you have to jam it all the way through though or at the base of the skull,” and she gestures with her good hand at her nape.

Before leaving, Carol and Sophia get to shoot a few more times.

Andrea and Olivia stand a few feet behind.

“I get it, you know?” Andrea tells Brennan, who glances at her confused, “why you kept the glock, it’s yours, right?”

“Right,” she presses her lips on a line.

“I don’t think anyone knows- I had to pry it out of him,” Andrea informs her.

Olivia hangs her head down for a second.

“What?” asks Andrea.

“Nothing, I just hate that they think it’s his- I did it, I hid it, Andrea- he’s taking all the fire from this morning and from the other day, It’s like he wants to be hated,” her speech quickens.

A shot goes off and a bottle shatters over the fence.

“He’s a big boy, he can take it," Andrea reassures her, "-and yeah, his presentation lacks a finer touch but he’s not wrong. He just wants to protect all of us."

“He’s a jerk, but you’re right, he’s not wrong.”

They return before lunch, as they get out of the car, Dale is waiting for them to ask them why they left like that.

“We told Glenn and Shane,” Andrea says angry looking at Dale, “we can’t get out now without asking you first?”

“I asked them to teach me- us,” Carol adds gesturing at her daughter.

“It’s dangerous out there, you can’t just take off like that,” Rick responds walking up them.

“It’s dangerous _here_,” Olivia snarks surrendering her weapons on the hood of the car for Dale to take and turning her back on them.

Behind her, as she gets close to the tent she hears Jimmy calling for Hershel, yelling- “it’s happening again!”

When Hershel comes out, Rick takes off with them.

Arriving to an empty tent, she lays down, crossing a leg over the other and shutting her eyes to quiet her mind.

**

Shane spends the rest of morning rooted on the same spot, arms crossed, mind all over the place and eyes fixed on it- he only turns when T-Dog hollers when he’s approaching him.

“Hey, Walsh.”

“Hey,” he glances at him.

“Let me take over, man, you can’t stay here all day.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah- go chill. Got my eyes on it, ‘kay?” and he takes a spot next to him.

“If anything happens...”

“I’ll go find you,” T-Dog reassures him. “We’re with you, you know? Me and some of the others.”

“Didn’t know there were sides,” he furrows looking at his friend.

“Come on, man. They are. Just tellin’ you now that you’ve calmed down- we’re with you, if you’re thinking of leavin’- count me in. Heard you hit the jackpot back on those houses.”

He’s surprised at both, that someone actually listened to him and that he has people on his side, besides Brennan. 

“Sure, T, you can have your pick,” he quirks up a grin and shakes his hand mid-air, patting him once on the back, “thanks, man.”

Passing by the well he cools off his head and drinks some water, while Lori walks with a bucket to get some of it.

Looking away, she waits for him to be done. Failing on keeping her mouth shut, “what happened to you Shane?”

Running a hand through his face when his finished, he shifts on his feet to face her, with his cap on his hands, “what are you talkin’ about?”

“You weren’t like this before- leavin’ Rick in the Hospital? hiding that gun? And- and this morning?”

“Told you before, Lori. I thought he was dead. You didn’t see what went down there, even if he wasn’t I knew- I knew he would be soon,” he keeps a calm tone.

Her head shakes.

“See Rick, he ain't built for this world, not for what it is now.”

“You’re wrong, you’re wrong,” Lori has to repeat utterly annoyed at him.

“Lori, how many times has he saved your life? I just- I want to know how many times. Because by my count, I've saved your life on four different occasions.”

“That night- after the fish fry,” she gestures, throwing a palm on her forehead to wipe some sweat.

“That was me too- all the people that we lost was because of him, Amy and Jim- and we almost lost Sophia and Olivia- that was all him.”

“What about Otis? Was that him too? You haven’t been the same since that night.”

His head leans, getting closer to whisper. “You wanna know what happened that night? What happened with Otis happened because I love Carl and I- I loved you, Lori- all that was for you. You think Rick has what it takes to do something like that? It broke me, Lor.”

She grimaces in pain, “Rick- he would have to, Shane- I know.”

“No, he wouldn’t- and he won’t.” He states dramatically going his way.

**

Back in camp he’s finally set on a mission after his talk with Lori- get their weapons back and keep everybody safe.

Taking a good look around, he finds everyone laying low, with no Rick or Dale anywhere to be found.

With Glenn watching on top of the RV alone, he searches inside for that duffel that has disappeared right under his nose.

Questioning the young man, he immediately knows they must have taken them someplace else.

He quickly finds Dale’s trail, leading him to the swamps and just as he was ready to hide the bag, stopping he stays back to ask nicely first.

“How about you just give me that bag, huh?”

“I'm not gonna do that,” says Dale standing his ground with that duffel wrapped in a trash bag resting on a tree behind him.

“Yeah you are, Dale. Unless, well, you do have that rifle over your shoulder.”

“You really think this is gonna keep us safe?”

“Mm-hmm, I know it is. Just give me the guns.”

“Rick is trying to-”

“Dale, shut up- just shut up and give me the guns.”

Training his rifle on his shoulder, Dale aims at Shane. “Am I gonna have to shoot you? Do I have to kill you? Is that what it's gonna take?

“Yeah.”

“You gonna shoot me like you did Otis? Tell another story- maybe it was her, I’ve seen you two together,” Dale’s eyes open wide and sharp, “that gun… I know it’s hers.”

Defiantly, Shane steps forward, while Dale’s aims go steadier.

Then his chest is pressed against the barrel, “you wanna tell a story, it was me- she did nothing, you hear me?”

“Maybe she didn’t but she’s been covering for you all this time, you two belong in this world,” he hesitantly puts the rifle down and straps it over his shoulder.

“How is that?” 

“This world, what it is now, it’s made for people like you. I may not have what it takes to last long but that’s okay. Cause I least I can say when the world went to shit I didn’t let it take me down with it.”

Dale picks up the bag and tosses it at Shane’s feet.

“Fair enough.” Shane states walking tall out of the swamps carrying the bag.

**

Rushing back with the duffel towards the group, that is gathered by the porch, he decides to arm everyone back up.

Offering a shotgun to Daryl first, “You with me, man?”

“Thought we couldn’t carry.”

While he continues handing the weapons his eyes search around for Olivia. “We can and we have to. Look, it was one thing sitting around here picking daisies when we thought this place was supposed to be safe. But now we know it ain't.”

Most of them take what’s theirs as some others question him on the way.

“Can you stop? You do this, you hand out these guns, my dad will make you leave tonight.”

“Rick said no guns.”

“You got yours?” he faces Andrea, “Where is she?”

“Yeah,” Andrea moves her chin up pointing at his back, “behind you.”

As his head turns, she stops at his side.

“What’s goin’ on?”.

Dropping the bag at his feet, he takes out her handgun and loads it for her.

“We ain’t taking more bullshit from these people,” he hands it to her and she holsters it on her belt.

Acknowledging she can’t use the rifle properly, he takes it to the tent with the remaining boxes of ammo and her other side piece.

“Shane- stop,” she grabs his arm from behind to make him turn.

“What? we need this, babe. This is the only way we stay safe.”

“I know. It's not about that- about before- I- I-” 

“It can wait, Liv. We’ll figure it out.”

He calls upon everyone to camp and informs them on their plan to leave, giving them the choice to follow if they want to.

“We’ll secure the houses before leavin’, stay there a few days, get on with the training...”

Lori stays on the sidelines with Carl on her side, hoping for Rick to be back as soon as possible, “You can’t do this, Shane. This is not your decision to make.”

“No, it ain’t, it’s theirs- see Rick,” he raises his voice for everyone to hear, “Rick has led us to an impossible situation being held hostage by dirt-bags and walkers- I rather take my chances out there.”

“So crossing state lines cause she misses her daddy is a safer option for you- all of you?” Lori questions.

“Excuse me?” Olivia interjects offended, “_She’s_ right here. We’re not saying it's gonna be easy or safer but at least they have options. What did I ever do to you anyway?” she squints confused at Lori’s dig.

T-Dog, who was on barn watch, comes running calling for Shane.

“They- Rick- Hershel-” T pants, “Shit- they got walkers on poles and they’re gonna open those doors.”

Without thinking Shane takes off running with everyone behind him.

By the doors, they have two walkers trapped in snare poles. Shane lunges at them and yelling to stop them from doing so.

“Back off!” Rick gestures holding into that pole.

Shane takes his gun from the back of his waistband, “Hershel man, let me ask you something.  
Could a living breathing person, could they walk away from this?”

And he fires three rounds into the chest of the female walker that Hershel had on the snare pole as Rick, holding into the other, desperately asks him to stop.

Then another two shot, “could a living person do that?”

“That’s enough,” Rick yells.

Then a final blow to the walker’s head, “yeah, you’re right- that’s enough.”

Hershel lets go of the pole and falls to his knees, perplexed- he processes that new found information after seeing Shane taking several fatal shots at that thing.

“Enough living at the mercy of others! Enough living next to a barn full of things that are trying to kill us!” he deeply shouts enraged staring at Rick, “it ain't like it was before! Now if y'all want to live, if you want to survive, you gotta fight for it!”

Taking the pickax propped on the wall to bash furiously onto the wooden doors and break the locks just enough for them to get out, as the rest of the group rushes behind him to back him up.

As the first walker steps out, he fires at its head and if falls in front of him. Looking at his back to observe everyone by his side aiming to the barn- except for Olivia, who has taken a spot at the back, shielding the kids with Lori and Carol holding onto them. She nods to him with her gun up, ready just in case.

He turns around and ends the other walker still trapped on Rick’s snare, and spins quickly to end the rest of the cluster coming out of that barn.

When all the weapons have stopped firing and the ground at their feet is covered with bodies, everything goes quiet.

Maggie and Beth help her father get up on his feet.

Then a struggler emerges behind the doors.

It’s a kid walker, not older than Carl or Sophia- everyone sees something different in it, not that they haven’t seen walker kids before but the intensity of the moment gets the best of them.

Carol can’t help but cry at the thought that that could easily be Sophia and she holds her daughter even closer.

Andrea remembers her sister when she was little.

Olivia sees her niece and hangs her head down with tears welling up.

Shane sees Carl and looks back to find him settled between Lori’s arms.

It’s Rick who doesn’t hesitate at that moment and pulls his gun to fire the final shot of the day.


	12. Aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Picks up seconds after the barn but it goes lighter (and smuttier) than previous chapters.

Silence breaks when Beth throws herself crying over the body of her mother seconds after Rick pulled that trigger.

A body that moves again, growling and clawing to get a hold of the young girl.

Rick and Daryl jump quickly to get her out of the walker’s reach, another shot rings out from Shane’s gun, with everybody staring at the mess at their feet, Hershel and Maggie bring Beth to safety- taking good look at his daughters, devastated, he finally speaks out loud to order Shane to leave immediately.

He doesn't fight it as his mind was already set on leaving, doesn’t make it any easier that no one advocates for him this time, except for Carl that painfully yells _no_ at his mom.

With no words, he marches up to camp to begin sloppily shoving everything into the duffels, his hands shake realizing what he’s done- not the walker massacre but traumatizing a family like that- it throws him off his usual self.

Olivia, lagging behind, has to hold them steady for a moment, as his head ducks, her hand reaches up to his nape, pulling him close to her forehead, “it’s okay, babe, let me do it.”

With a tilt and a long sigh, his palm rubs furiously at his head- and not being able to stand still he starts dismantling the tent.

While doing so, he observes Andrea and T doing the same with theirs.

Nodding at them, they take their fair share of supplies and put everything in the car.

Caught in a blindside while he folds the tent on his knees, Carl runs out to him to throw his arms around his neck.

“Hey, hey- buddy, it’s okay.” He soothes a palm at the back of the boy’s head.

He really didn’t think about how hard it’d be to say goodbye until that moment when he feels the tightness in his chest and the sting in his eyes bringing some tears out.

“No, you can’t go!” Carl cries softly on his shoulder, clinging harder onto him.

“You take care of your mom, okay?” he says low when Lori walks up to them, “remember what I taught you, bud.”

“Carl- come on,” Lori rushes him.

Unwillingly, after a few seconds and a tighter hug- he lets go of Shane as Lori glances back at him while she takes Carl inside the house.

He watches them go knowing that’s probably the last time he’s gonna see them and finishes with the tent.

Goodbyes are skimped and somehow awkward, as Dale relentlessly tries to convince Andrea and T to stay.

Olivia feels helpless, as much as she wanted to go, it weighs her down that it happened that way.

It breaks her heart watching Shane saying goodbye to Carl- it wasn’t supposed to be like that, even though he’s assured her many times that’s what he wants, she still feels like she’s stealing him away from his real family. Now more than ever.

Rick doesn’t say much but make sure they take their fair share of supplies.

Everything at the ready, Andrea sits behind the wheel with Olivia and T on the back seat waiting for Shane.

He pops open the trunk to shove the tent on top of everything else as Glenn comes around to say goodbye to him.

“Hey, man- you know I would go with you but-”

“Maggie, I know,” Shane nods in respect. “You know where we’re goin’?”

"Yeah." .

“Will you look after them?” asks Shane.

“You got it.”

“If something-”

“I know where you are,” Glenn quickly replies to ease his mind and shakes his hand.

Closing shut the door after climbing into the car he eyes Olivia through the side view mirror and then far back at the farm as Andrea starts the car leaving that place behind them.

**

The drive to that neighborhood they explored a while ago feels longer than it is.

All four of them barely speak, the only time they do so is Shane to give Andrea directions.

When they arrive at the gate the sun is just starting to fade for what it feels like the longest day of summer that seems like it has no end yet.

With a lot of work to do before they can rest, Shane takes Andrea inside as backup to do a sweep around for any walkers while T and Olivia secure the front door with chains.

They pick one of the closest houses to the gate and secure the perimeter around it with wire they take from one of the garages.

While the three of them work thoroughly before it gets dark to tie that wire, hanging some scrap metal around it as an alarm system, Olivia heads to the kitchen and heats some of those MREs they still got left for dinner.

The power is off but the water is still running, on the kitchen sink she cleans up the cuts on her fingers that got some bleeding and dirt from the day.

She restlessly goes through the empty cabinets, forgetting they cleaned them out good the last time, not looking for food but for something stronger to drink.

Moving into the living room, where everything sits perfectly messed up accumulating dust- there's a big light blue sofa with throw pillows, a skew armchair facing the window, kid toys all over the rug, a magazine and a mug on the coffee table and an arched door that leads to a dinning room where she finds a hutch containing what she was looking for- alcohol. With not much variety she just snags the bottle of bourbon.

Going back to the kitchen she rinses the glasses and adds them to the table setting.

Over the counter her steady hand pours herself one and throws it back almost finishing the glass in one gulp.

Shane enters the space placing the lantern in the middle of the kitchen table, “everything alright in here?”

“Hm-hm,” the glass clinks on the surface as she swallows, turning around to see him offering her a flashlight.

“That’s yours.”

Taking it from his palm, he goes around her to clean his hands as well. The tension is still present when they’re alone, they barely look at each other when they speak.

“Want one?” She asks, filling up the glass again.

Drying off his hands with a rag, “is it good?”

“I don’t know- all taste the same to me,” her shoulder shrugs, “could use some ice though.”

He huffs tilting back to take a small sip, “good enough.”

“Shane-” with a knitted brow, searching for his eyes, “are we good?”

Drawing a long breath, “we’re gonna have to, Liv.”

“I’m- I’m sorry you had to say goodbye like that.”

“Wasn’t gonna be pretty either way,” he states hoarse before drowning that lump in his throat with a bigger sip.

Andrea and T haul the rest of their stuff inside and they all sit around the kitchen table, under the gloom light of that sad lamp, that looks smaller on that big open space.

“No wine?” Andrea questions filling up her glass and offering some to Shane and T.

“It was this or some apple schnapps.” She replies.

Then T- Dog asks, “What happens now?”

Leaning back on his chair, “now, we regroup, take what we need, find a backup car,” Shane lists almost without thinking, “then we leave.”

“If that’s what you want,” Olivia adds glancing at Andrea and T, “you don’t owe me anything.”

“I’m with you, Sergeant,” T gracefully smiles gesturing at her with his fork.

“Yeah, me too,” Andrea adds after taking a sip of her drink, “been in Georgia for too long, I wanna see what’s out there.”

When the plates are clean of any food, leaving them laying there, they go on searching for rooms to crash.

There’s five of them divided into two stories, one is an office, there’s two kids rooms, a guest, and a master bedroom.

Taking the master where the window looks out to the front yard, staring outside, she makes out Shane’s silhouette checking that fence one more time and going out the street as he paces around alone for a while.

There’s an attached bathroom so her first thought is getting a brisk shower to brush off the day.

She frees her left arm from the sling and dressing and steps out of her shoes, with change of clothes settled over the sink she proceeds to fix the flashlight on the mirror cabinet to flood over the bathtub.

When she's done, she slips into a pair of dark grey panties and a black tank top before wrapping that limb once again. Hating another scar on her body, she pushes her damp hair to the opposite shoulder and covers the cut with a clean bandage.

Her discarded clothes get molded into a ball and tossed next to her bag where she grabs her toothbrush to finish her washing routine.

While she does so, she hears Shane’s boots entering the room.

“Liv?” he pushes the door to the bathroom that was cracked open and points at her with his torch.

“Yeah?” she mumbles brushing her molars.

“Nothing, I thought you were in bed already- do you need- did you fix your-” pointing at her arm.

Nodding his way, he leaves her to it- as she finishes rinsing her mouth.

He puts the lamp on their room before taking off his clothes, to do the same as her.

“All yours,” she tells him, stepping out of the bathroom, “left the light over the mirror.”

While he gets his turn in the bathroom, she gets rid of the covers on the bed to pool at the end of the bed frame to set new ones she found in a linen closet.

Lastly, she gets to lay down after that hell of a day- she turns off the lamp and curls into her good side as her lids fall shut listening to the water running.

Facing her, Shane’s body takes over the other side of the mattress when he’s done, stripped down to his boxers, his head molds the comfy pillow, and with hesitation a palm reaches out to caress her face, brushing back some wet strands that were sticking on her neck.

Opening her eyes lazily, she whispers, “hey.”

“Sorry- didn’t wanna wake you up.”

“You didn’t.”

With an exhausted sigh, he brings his hand back to scratch on his shoulder, “do you hate me?”

“What? No, I don’t hate you, Shane” she frankly assures him.

“You mad at me?”

“I was, I really was-” she admits, “are you mad at me?”

“No, I’m not mad at you.”

“Shane,” she protests in a small voice.

“No, wasn’t about you- look, those things I said? There was some truth to it but that’s not how I wanted to tell you- this fuckin’ day got me taking out on you cause you were there- I didn’t want-”

Her body shifts to lay on her back.

“Liv, I mean it.”

Taking a deep breath, “I know- I know you do- and you were right- I- I- choke up sometimes when you get real with me and I don’t know why- cause I feel it too, if I agree with you it’s cause I really do-” with eyes watering, her voice cracks deep every few words, “but I’ve told you other things, things I haven’t shared with anyone before- what I did, you’re the only one that knows- wasn’t fair that you used that to hurt me.”

Dragging his face close to her head, he abandons his pillow to take half of hers, “It wasn't - I’m real sorry, babe, I know- I fuckin’ know-” he notes a couple of tears jumping out in the dark when brushing his fingers on her cheek, “I ain’t doing that again, last thing I wanna do is to hurt you like that.”

As her face switches to the side to look at him, holding a few sobs at the back of her throat, to tell him low, “I'm sorry too, you know? I should've told you earlier, I just wanna be with you- if I doubt is cause I can’t see what kind of life we could have in this nightmare we are now- can’t see shit since this happened- but being with you, no matter where- that's all I want, babe.”

His arm drapes over her stomach as his face dips to place a kiss on her shoulder, “that’s all I want too, Liv, just you- alright?”

Settling her forearm over his, her palm smooths his skin with a light squeeze and a shy hum in her throat, as her lips get printed on his temple.

For a change he falls asleep first, blame it on the bed or the lack of rest on the past few days but he doesn't leave her side the whole night.

**

Even when she wakes up, his brow is still knitted tight and his chest moving with peaceful breaths.

She closes the shades that still filter leaving a nice yellow shade bouncing on the vanilla colored walls, and heads downstairs where Andrea is making some instant coffee.

“Morning.”

“Morning, where’s T?”

“He’s checking the generator- see if we can get some power going,” Andrea tells her, grabbing two mugs, “Shane?”

“Still out,” she responds sitting on a stool at the kitchen island, “didn’t want to wake him up- he looks so sweet like that.”

“Bet he does,” with a grin and a firm hold, Andrea fills those mugs up to the rim in front of Olivia.

Her jaw drops, amused, “Andrea!”

“What? a woman can only dream, right?” she jokes.

Shaking her head she laughs, “be my guest.”

Andrea takes her coffee, goes outside to stay on watch and Olivia grabs the other to march back upstairs to that sweet sleeping man Andrea dreams about, another laugh stirs out of her mouth while climbing those steps.

Back in the room, Shane has stretched to rest looking up occupying most of the bed. His eyes twitch half open when she closes the door.

“Hey, ” he greets softly.

Kneeling on the bed, she tilts forward and places a kiss on his forehead, “morning,” then sits with her back leaned on the headboard, holding the mug up to sip some coffee.

His eyelids go back down again, as her free hand cradles his head, enjoying her breakfast her fingers soothe over the growing fuzz over his ear.

He hums low on his throat as his legs shift for a beat- smiling to herself she looks down noticing his boxers bulging up, and her fingers rake harder.

“Liv-” he says hoarsely with eyes still shut.

Biting her lip, she continues to do so, all over his head as her feet move to fondle his knee up to his thigh.

Grinning, he gets a hold of her feet and pleads again at her name.

Placing the mug on the bedside table, she slowly drapes a leg over him to stride on his hips, playfully smiling, bitting at her lower lip.

“Someone missed me,” she says amused, moving her hips in circle motion slowly- feeling him getting harder behind her panties.

His hands move to stroke at her thighs, “fuck, babe,” he groans opening his eyes to see her staring down on him.

“You like that?” she teases bending forward, carefully, she tucks her bad arm close to her, with her palm on his shoulder, as her other stretches to rub at his head.

Wincing, his hips buck up to her as her lips seal his mouth in a deep kiss before he can’t reply.

“I fuckin’ missed you,” he whines parting lips, sinking his fingertips deeper in her skin, “did you miss me?”

“So much, babe,” she breathes, printing her teeth on his jaw.

One of his hands draws the curve of her ass to her back to push her tank top up to her shoulders, breaking for him- her torso straightens up, sliding her good side out of the fabric first and then the other.

Shifting on his back to lean on his elbows, observing the still visible damage on her ribcage, a lingering light shade of purple with other circles of green and yellow paint her body- wishing he could take that pain from her, a hand ghosts over her ribs, “Liv.”

“It’s okay, babe- barely hurts anymore,” cupping his face with both hands, she dips to kiss him again, using the opportunity to get him to his back.

Once she has him pinned down, with her hands bracing on his chest- her spine straightens while her hips slide for and backwards on his length.

His hand goes between them to push the elastic of her panties to the side to check how much she really missed him.

Using his thumb to stroke at her tender spot, that glides in circles, “you like that?” he asks already knowing the answer from those juices stirring out of her, that got his fingers drenched in seconds.

Aching for him, she gasps- gripping at his forearm to stop him and promptly back off him to climb out of the bed- crouching down she rummages in the duffel looking for a condom.

“Take them off-” she orders and he quickly lifts his butt to slip out of his boxers without question and throws them to the floor.

Her panties get left behind as she crawls from the end of the bed to kneel by his side- biting the corner of the wrapping, she gets the condom out but instead of putting it on- her torso bends forwards, with her mouth hovering over his sex as her tongue flattens on his length from the base up where she wraps her lips around his head, making him twitch and swear and groan at her name- he moves his hand to link in her loose locks while she goes down a few times, humming on his cock, her tongue gives a one final lick before rolling the latex on.

“Darlin, come here- '' Shane fixes a couple of pillows behind his back leaving him slightly reclined- grabbing her waist mindfully as she goes back on top of him.

Her nails drag all over his torso, as her hips settle over his cock- fitting perfectly on her slicked slit- she grinds searching that friction that she loves inside her folds and clit.

His palms roam the curve of her ass, following her moves, all want- he feels his cock itching for her, any part of her, her mouth, her hand, her walls- he’d take anything right now.

“Liv,” hissing, “you’re driving me crazy.”

Leaning down, her bad arm clasps on the side of his ribcage, and reaches down with the other between them to grab his cock- lining up with her entrance to sink on him, “that better?” as that hand comes back up to brace on the pillow next to his head, he pulls her closer to his mouth, humming.

Moving beautifully with him inside, her hips buck up faster than she intended from the heavy foreplay- her legs relax and tense with every roll, clenching on his cock every time she goes up.

His stomach hollows as he can’t help but move with her- with a hand knitted on her hair, and his other palm cupping her breast, he notes her fingers pressing into the back of his palm pushing him to grip a little tighter.

Her body coils over his torso, curling her healthy limb around his neck to press her fingertips on his shoulder, unclenched jaw against his lips, he tastes her moans on his throat as her lids squeeze shut, almost on the edge.

“Liv-- fuck-” palming her ass, he pushes up with his hips to reach deeper in her.

Grunting, he starts thrusting up sharply- with her body straining, her face falls to the crook of his neck, breathing on his veins covered in sweat, teething at its warmth- the sweet noises calling for him, the tremble on her hips with those juices sliding down her inner thigh that reach down to his own thigh- cause him to groan promptly, while his body strains and those hands fist at the meat of her ass, his cock pulsates releasing all that was building up inside the barrier between them.

“Sorry,” he mumbles on her neck, brushing her hair to the other side.

“Baby, that’s okay-” kissing his cheek, she lifts her torso up and props her hands on his chest, “you good?”

Hands smoothing down her body, “yeah,” ending up on her legs, soothing his nails on those recently formed goosebumps on her skin.

Her hips start rolling again, more focused that before- latching harder on his cock, eyes filled with want, she stares down to him.

His fingers glide up her thigh to focus on her clit, “there, babe,” she moans bucking forward, melting on his hand.

“Shane,” she cries, clasping on his forearm.

“I know, babe, come for me,” he encourages rubbing harder on that tender spot.

Anticipating the wave that is about to hit, her knees clench on his sides and she barely can keep up with the rhythm- with a tremor she bucks up a few times until her hips give up on her, and her body starts shuddering- choking on a moan when peaking, her torso falls over his chest waiting for her as he shifts to hold her while she recovers.

Chokes on a moan when when peaking orgasm as her torso shudders- wildly falling over his

“Look at you, babe” he says hoarse, planting a kiss on her hair, “you’re amazing like that.”

With a light labored chuckle on his breastbone, “you are too.”

Shifting over him to break from his link, she falls close into his side with her right arm tucked between his ribcage and his arm that loops around her back to rest on her waist.

He reaches down to get rid of the condom with his other hand and tosses the remains to the floor, not really caring where it lands- then his elbow bends back to adjust the pillow below his head.

Olivia places her cheek on his shoulder and her opposite arm over his stomach, while her leg stretches between his.

“I really needed that, babe.”

“I know, baby- me too,” he admits- grinning, “I love that you call me _babe_ now.”

Squinting silly, “haven’t I called you that before?”

“Uh-uh.”

“I have so-- in my mind-” she remarks funny.

Pinching her ass playfully, “it doesn’t count if I can’t hear it, darlin’.”

Smirking, her palm glides up to flatten over his tattoo to prop her chin on it and look directly into his eyes, “I like everything you call me, but I _adore_ when you call me _Liv_.” She states cutely smiling, almost blushing.

“How’s so?”

“Cause you’re the only one who does it,” she adds lovingly without choking up this time.

As her mouth curves, biting the inside of her cheek- his head bends closer to give her a little peck on her nose.

“You’re gonna be the end of me,” he huffs, letting his head fall back, “I swear.”

“You should talk,” she yawns, placing her cheek over his skin.

“Are you gonna fall asleep on me now?” he rattles her side.

“Probably- those painkillers, man- they’re strong-” another yawn.

“It's okay if you do, Liv. You’re still healing. Antibiotics too, right? ”

“Uh-huh- I just- with only the four of us, I feel bad not being able to take a shift with you guys.”

“We can manage for now, babe,” his palm massages light circles on her hip.

Her mouth opens wide again, fighting to stay awake- dragging her body slightly up to meet with his face, as Shane’s hand finds her jaw with his thumb brushing on her cheekbone, she ducks to kiss him as his fingers move to tangle with her loose mane.

Pressing on his lips, she grazes his tongue softly as her heart races in her chest, falling harder for him with every move, every caress, every word, putting a side to the bad moments, she doesn't want to go back- to being alone, to doing everything on her own. He’s it- all she thinks about and it goes both ways- he’d do anything for her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you're still with me, thank you for reading!
> 
> Happy Holidays!


	13. Hurricane

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's implied on the rating but just in case you don't want to read this in public, this chapter is all porn (and a little kinky.)

Legs dangling on the edge of the small counter space over the bathroom’s sink, with not more than a pair of panties and a tank top, her hand holds a razor against Shane’s face that is covered in shaving cream.

“Careful, Sergeant.”

Steady grip, might as well wielding a sword, her brow draws the same crease of concentration she gets when she's out in the field. Lips tight closed in a half pucker, she gets ready to slay the stubble off his face and neck.

“Shh, don’t move.”

As that blade slides smoothly along his cheek down to his jaw- she ponders if this what life would be if she’d have met Shane before the world went to hell.

Head tilting at her will, his palms roam the sides of her legs, gingerly mapping with his index finger the uneven ground of the scarred tissue on the side of her leg, noting the touch only bothers her when they're having sex. Often moving his hand to a different place on her body or just a simple call at his name to take the hint to draw back.

Not now, she doesn't flinch in the slightest.

Out of the short list of things Shane Walsh can hold back from comment or ask, that is one of them, as curious as he is, he waits for her if she ever wants to confide that story to him.

No nip or cut marked on his skin, she runs a towel through his face and neck when she’s done, leaning to kiss the corner of his mouth that cutely tense smile behind her lips.

Tilting for a quick check on the mirror behind her, he runs a hand all over his chin searching for the smallest pricking hair before going back to her.

Then, he’s back to those legs that stretch to knot around his hips, as he grabs her butt to lift her up in his arms suddenly. Making her laugh and hold a tight grip around his neck as he walks towards the shower.

Playing house, they fall into some sort of normalcy in that cool-the-sac, they do everything closely- when they’re together, they are absolutely together. When he’s under the spray, she’s washing her body, when she’s rinsing her hair, he distracts her by running his hands all over her soaked skin.

The time they spent in that place is quieter than in the farm, feels safer somehow, even with its cons.

The small group stays vigilant at all times. Except for the first night, Shane signs up for mostly night shifts and sleeps in the morning. Olivia doesn’t take full shifts but she does keep the others company when the drugs allow her to do it.

With the prospect of leaving in three days tops, they scavenge the houses for tools, weapons, clothes, winter specifically- none of them packed for it and they have a nice selection of stuff left behind to take their pick, and anything that might have some use later.

Getting electricity from a broken generator that T repairs is probably the task they almost give up on doing, but he finally gets it running and they hook it up on their temporary home.

A broken door in one of the yards has to get fixed to keep unwelcome guests that were infiltrating the neighborhood, not many, just a one or two here and there.

**

A few houses over from where they have settled, Olivia and Shane make a not so quick sweep of rooms they didn’t bother to search the first time they were there.

Stranger drawers and closets get trespassed just before noon. She carefully goes through personal belongings, picking up only what could be useful and leaving the rest as it was, hoping someone one day will come back for it.

Shane swipes hangers in the closet figuring out what they need. He eyes a few coats that could fit them and throws them to the bed, stopping for a moment looking over his shoulder- he observes her folding a pile of sweaters with military precision on the dresser.

Stealthily he takes a few steps, as his arms lock around her waist, head dipping to press a kiss on her neck. Head tilting, she softly smiles keeping on with her task.

He buries his nose on her hair and tries to make her body sway with his, “Liv?”

Placing an arm over his hold, head tilting to the side, she lets him rock her, “Yeah?”

“Have dinner with me later.”

“We always have dinner together.”

“I mean just us- you know, like a date?”

“A date, huh?” her brow raises, turning around to look at him, wrapping her arms around his neck, “what did you have in mind?”

“I don’t know- just pick a place and we- we could have one of those ramen things you love so much,” grinning, palms roam her hips, “maybe a little wine from that cellar.”

With a bite of sarcasm, she states, “wow, Walsh, you really know how to sweep ‘em girls off their feet.”

Scoffing, “Is that a yes?”

“Yeah, I guess. I have no other plans.” She keeps messing with him.

Walking backwards to the bed, he pulls her with him, laughing “is that so?”

Nodding amused, when they’re by the end of the mattress- he sits with her climbing onto his lap.

Her tongue juts out playfully to trace his mouth before planting and quick kiss.

With a sly grin on her face, “what about dessert?"

Shamelessly grabbing her hand, he guides between them to place it over his crotch to rub himself on it.

Murmuring in her mouth, dirty, "you got your dessert right here, darlin'."

Digging her teeth at his bottom lip, she fondles over his cargo pants getting his cock stiff with her fingers curve around him.

Boldly going up and down on his length, releasing his lip to ask, “can I have it now?”

“It’s all yours, babe,” he grabs her face to seize her lips, invading her mouth all at once, with no tease he takes her all in, roughly playing with her tongue, while his other hand skims under the hem of her tee up to her braless chest that arouses under the sweep of his fingertips.

Ignoring the shy flares of pain on her arm every time she strains more than she should- craving more of him, her fingers quickly move to undo the buttons of his shirt, pushing it back to as he slips out of it.

When he’s out of his shirt, he helps her get rid of her own, and suddenly his back is pressed on the bed. Hauling himself up against the mattress, he pushes those coats he tossed over minutes ago to the floor- with Olivia moving on top to straddle his thighs, her hands hastily unfastening his belt and unzipping his pants, hungry for him, she pulls back his underwear to let his boner in full display.

Tightly gripping on his length, she starts jerking him off slowly, raking the fingertips of her other hand along his abs.

“Shit,” he grunts, placing a pillow under his head to watch her work.

“You like it on top, huh?” he mutters, eyes scanning her half-naked body as his hand reaches to grab her ass.

Wide grin, her eye winks at him before shifting to find her position on the bed, extending her body over his bottom half, with a leg between his knees and her mouth right over his sex.

Palm stroking right at the base, she grazes his balls with the edge of her hand- when she’s ready her tongue glides flat over his cock, wetting that straining vein up to the head where her lips wrap sensually.

A fist knitted in sheets, his other clasped at her shoulder blade where his nails dig, deeply aroused with each lick and that sweet suction of her mouth.

She takes a bigger bite every time she goes down, as her lips press harder around him, his pre-cum leaks all over her tongue to mix with her saliva.

He lifts his head in between curses to see her forwardly tasting his cock with such passion that makes him wanna come right there.

Humming on him, her palm moves to cup his balls as her tongue slides up and down faster.

Fingers twining on her locks now, he unintentionally pushes her head down a couple times.

“Christ.”

Hips bucking, his cock pulsates extremely close to the edge.

“Ahh- Liv.”

He's all hers now, noting him straining and coiling under her care, she doesn’t waver when he mumbles he’s coming.

Gazing up, she part lips for a second to grasp some air. She smirks, quickly gazing at him before dipping down again to press her slicked lips around his cock, fiercely blowing him, like she hasn’t done before, she ups the rhythm that gets him to the end.

Knitted brow damped in sweat, his eyes clenched shut- sensing that the orgasmic jolt rushing to the last nerve of his cock that twitches as he gets that sweet release inside her mouth.

Swallowing, it sticks on her throat as she tastes his cum for the first time- she gently soothes her palm on his cock as she drags her body up the bed.

Settling at his side, she brushes that hand over his sweat covered torso up to the curve of his neck that still strains red.

When he opens his eyes, she’s floating over his face with a cute grin, greeting him back to a calm state, “hey.”

“Hey,” he huffs back, completely drained, he moves his arm limply underneath her ribcage to curl around her waist.

When his other arm responds is to pull her face closer to him and bring her to his mouth, tongue moving slowly inside her lips and palm caressing her side, he blindly places his hand over her breast to squeeze tenderly.

Once he’s completely relaxed, he adjusts his dick on his boxers and lazily bends up to change positions with her.

Kneeling between her parted legs, he undoes the buttons of her jeans, as she toes off his boots the best she can in that position, hands reaching for his torso, she playfully tugs his boxers down again, “why are these still on?”

Scoffing, he pats her on the hip hinting her to lift her butt up so he can yank those jeans of her body to return the favor.

Stripped down to her panties, he stops her hand that was about to push them down.

“Shh- not yet,” smirking, he brings her fingertips up to his mouth and presses them over his lips before settling her arm carefully on the mattress.

Her legs part wider, inviting him as he bends forwards, aiming for her lips he kisses her before wandering down with his eager tongue to taste the rest of her body.

Taking the long way down, every inch of her gets covered if not by hand then by tongue.

Nibbling along her collarbone, a hand gliding up her side, his fingertips printed on her hip as he grasps a little tighter, leaving no place untouched as he wanted to carve to memory every part of her- stopping at her breasts a little longer, caring for both as his hand massages one his mouth covers the other.

Olivia shudders and breathes loud, head spinning intoxicated with every touch as a chill runs down her spine- feeling the fire shooting to every nerve from the center of her body.

Her hand, resting on his nape limply, follows his every move as he travels further down, leaving a trail of wet kisses over her stomach and down to her navel, where he circles around with the sharp tip of his tongue.

“Shane,” she hisses low, trying to push him down to tend to her pussy.

Well aware of what he’s doing, he bites the elastic of her light grey panties pulling it back and releasing it to clap on her skin.

Lowering his torso, his thumb presses on her clit with her panties in the middle, showing a smug grin, as that finger digs deeper on her slit tucking the fabric with it, extremely pleased with his doing- he watches how those juices filter to darken the grey under his thumb pad.

“Fuck,” moaning, she leans on a elbow and squeezes at his nape with her other hand.

His gaze lifts, “you want me?” asking lewd, his finger strokes down to push on her entrance.

“Don’t make me beg, Shane” she whines bucking her hips, “I didn’t ma-”

Before she can finish, he’s pinning her leg on the mattress and diving to bite her inner thigh, stirring a loud moan out of her when he latches into the strong muscle, that strains and makes her leg tremble every time she orgasms.

Stepping in to that fine line between pleasure and torture, her mind goes blank to the overwhelming sensation on her flesh- her body strains, askew to the side, as his mouth suctions viciously on that spot. She wants to cry harder but the words don’t come out.

Choking on a silent moan, balling the covers as he marks his teeth on that spot that she didn’t know she would enjoy that much.

When his jaw is unclenched, he sweetly soothes his tongue over that deep love bite that's already showing its colors.

Sweetly hurting in an airless cry out at his name, she urges her hand to guide his face to the other leg.

Discovering a new favorite spot of hers, and now his, he does the same on the other thigh.

Taking another mouthful of hers, extremely close to the groin with a solid latch on her flesh- he unleashes a long thread of profanity out of her mouth damning at God, Jesus Fucking Christ and some other saints she might have made up, mixed with his own name like he has never heard her before.

If she hasn’t come yet, he knows she’s close. With a final lick over that teeth mark, feeling her heat practically slapping him on the face- he frees her leg, wetting his lips at the sight of her now ruined panties.

Ghosting a palm over them, quite pleased of his doing, huffing, “damn, darlin'.”

Her body all coiled up, heavily exhaling, with now way around from begging, “Shane, please.”

He finally pulls down her underwear, tucking his arms underneath her thighs, he slides his tongue on her slit before wrapping his lips around her clit.

Doesn’t take him much after that- right on the edge, she strains gripping tightly on the covers, tongue working wildly on that tender spot and she’s there- crying orgasm in a chocked moan as her walls flutter.

With no time to catch her breath, she reacts jolting to his still attached mouth that won't let go of her.

Feasting on her, he keeps sucking on her swollen nub trying to get her to come again.

“Shane, Shane, Shane-- fuck.”

She tries to push his head away, squirming, with a heel on his shoulder and the other sinking on his back, as strong as she is, barely moves him an inch from her.

“Ea- Ease up, Shane- please,” she moans, hands weakened at the crown of his head.

After a few seconds, those overly sensitive nerves calm down and she’s back enjoying Shane’s mouth on her.

Arching her back, she whimpers gripping at her own boob and relaxing her legs over his shoulders.

Letting go of his hold around her thighs, he pins one to the side, using his other hand to shove two fingers inside her.

Flicking her tenderness, he urges those fingers in and out until her hips tremble for a second time, as a gush of fluids that were pooling inside flow all over his hand and the covers beneath her.

With no air left on her lungs, she heaves overwhelmed by the second climax, as her hand reaches down shielding herself from him.

Grinning, gets out of her and kisses that hand covering her sex, as he soothers his lips up along her torso to her mouth, uttering, “I knew you could take it.”

Scoffing, she wipes the sweat on her flustered face, “I’m gonna fucking kill you.”

“I’d love to see you try, darlin’,” laugh pressed on her cheek,“-now don’t go on tellin’ me you didn’t like that cause the sheets tell a different story.”

Swatting the back of her hand on his shoulder, she breathes faltering, “You’re a fucking hurricane, Shane Walsh, a complete messy, bloody, hurricane.”

Snorting, “Should I warn you next time?” his body shifts to the side, noticing the hard-on he had going and ignored while being focused on her.

Chest still heaving, with a cracked voice, she tells him, “no, that’s alright- I just wasn’t ready.”

She clears her throat and hooks and arm around his torso, gazing up to him, “how did you know how- where to do that, Hannibal?”

“I didn’t- I just wanned to eat all of you,” grinning, he dips, mouth open to bite her shoulder.

She laughs slipping a hand down to tug at his pants.

“These should be off, already, baby,” fingers prying under his boxers and curling around his cock.

With a muffled hum on her skin, his lips stroke the curve to her neck to nip her earlobe, “you sure you can take a second round?”

“I’m not gonna beg again, asshole. If you don’t wanna...”

Cracking a smile, he leans on an elbow and traces her lips with his finger pad, “you and your beautiful mouth.”

He pushes himself up, standing up at the edge of the bed to undress completely before her eyes.

When he’s back on top of her, grinding over her sex, ready as ever for him- he locks eyes with her, cupping her jaw, his tone changes when pleading softly, “I wanna feel you, Liv.”

“Shane.”

Tilting, “just this time.”

“Shane.”

She sighs.

“Like the other day, please, babe.”

Her mouth pressed in a tight line, thinking for a minute, as rationally as the moment allows her- he wants to feel him too, with no barriers.

“Fuck it- but you have to be-”

“I’ll be real careful, darlin’- promise,” he sweetly kisses the tip of her nose.

Diving into her entrance gingerly, he lowers his torso covering her entirely, “god, you feel so good already, babe.”

Lips parted on the corner of her mouth, she shudders closing her eyes as he rolls slower than she expected, feeling his heartbeat change underneath her palm glued to his neck- he’s not a hurricane anymore, he’s turned in to calm summer tide- salty on her mouth and warm dampness soothing all over her, rocking her gently.

Wanting to make it last, he barely moves out of her, thrusts aren’t thrusts now and it doesn’t feel like a simple fuck, he’s loving her with his all.

Groaning, he tastes her mouth at the same pace, stroking her hair, tucking the opposite arm under her, pulling her closer, wishing he could melt with her in that place, on that bed.

Hardly making a sound, when she’s about to come, her fingertips sink onto his back and he breaks from the kiss to look at her as she does so.

She doesn’t struggle like before, nor gulps for air- he gives her time without changing the pace, just stares at her, beautifully blushing and sweating as the wave crashes all over her when she comes, her legs clasp on her his as her toes receive the last jolt of electricity, she quivers underneath him.

Moments after, as her walls contract around him, he has enough time to pull out as she moves her hand down to help him, with a light touch of her fingers he ejaculates on the sheets between her thighs, grunting in relief, his body lazily falls on top of her.

Catching his breath on the side of her neck, her palms glide up his back, fingers brushing his sweat in the way up to his nape.

Words on her throat get unstuck when her mouth blurts out warmly low in his ear, “I love you.”

Lifting his gaze, his thumb brushes gently on her cheek, saying back,“I love you too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, there was some feelings at the end.


	14. Chain

Olivia rarely remembers the dreams her mind concocts when she’s asleep, the only memory that lingers at times is the bad taste of the same nightmare she’s been having since the world ended.

It only happens every now and then when the dreaded dream creeps back into her mind when she’s unconscious. The event is always the same: she stands in the outside of a sealed window on her father's house, as she watches her family's last agonizing moments trapped in the living room. This time, Shane’s inside too.

Desperate to enter the place, her hands burn at the touch on the wall from an invisible fire only she can hear roaring inside her ears. Muting everything else.

She’d wake up suddenly, reacting the imaginary pain on her palms from clawing her way inside.

This night she doesn’t wake up- the dream keeps going as she watches everyone she loves suffocating to death.

When Shane returns to the room way into the last shade of dark in the morning, he finds her crying in her sleep. Drenched in sweat, fisting the pillow and crying his name in distress.

He soothes his palm softly on her back, over the fabric of her tank top, catching the radiating heat coming from her body.

Attempting to pull her out of a deep REM sleep, he calls her name, using a hand to push her hair out of her face and gently shaking her shoulder.

He’s seen her getting upset-dreaming and speaking a few times now, but not as badly as this one. Takes him a long three minutes to pull her out of it.

Shuddering, her eyes shoot open, turning to lay on her back and throwing an arm to clutch her fingers firmly around Shane’s wrist.

“It’s okay, babe,” he soothes, lowering his hand to cup her face, “it was just a dream.”

“Shane?” there’s a tremor in her voice.

Adjusting to reality, her heart races and she has to sit down, everything weighs on her: his touch, her clothes, the hair, the chain around her neck, the bed- even the faint air that enters through the window feels like a suffocation.

Grabbing the hem of her tank top to pull it over her head, it gets tangled with her dog tags. Shane helps her the rest of the way, “Lemme.” Unknotting the necklace from the fabric, he places the tags over her exposed breastbone that raises fast with every breath. Then he’s all soothing palms around her, gently trying to ease her up. 

Pushing her back against the headboard, her eyes drown in new tears with her mouth twisted about to burst out into a cry, as out a tiny sob rumble in her throat.

“Shh, shh- I’m here, tell me what you need.” He breathes calm against her burning forehead.

Olivia has to clear her throat before speaking again. With a hand on her collarbone, “water.”

“On it.”

Kissing her temple, Shane stands up and leaves momentarily to find and fill a bottle for her.

When he comes back, she has crawled out of the bed to sit down on the floor, searching to cool her body down on the hard surface of the house.

Kneeling by her side, “you wanna talk about it? “

She only responds with a pained noise before grabbing that bottle to chug half of it.

“Babe?” 

His hands ghost her every move with barely grazing her skin, anticipating her need for his comfort. Her body still trembles when she tries to convey a word or a thought.

Tiredly, she extends her arm to the bed and brings her pillow down to the floorboards to lay on her side. His body follows, leaning on an elbow at her back with his other locking around her midsection, his chin lowers at the curve of her neck pushing some hair strands out of the way with his nose.

“I’m here, baby. You wanna tell me about it?”

“No.” She utters way low.

“You know, I used to had bad dreams like that when I was a kid-”

“Wasn’t a kid’s dream.”

“I know, I know- lemme finish. It doesn’t matter what the dream was… what matters is that once you put it into words it gets out of your head and you can go back to sleep- that’s what ma used to tell me.”

“Did it work?”

“It did but I think that had more to do with her distracting me enough to do so.”

Piquing her curiosity, she can’t help but ask, “what did she do?”

Pressing a light smile on her cheek, “well, she would sing a song each time that would cast the nightmare away. Like some kind of spell and she got me laughing enough to forget.”

Turning her face to see his eyes, “what would she sing?”

Slightly embarrassed by the memory, he tsks his tongue before confiding in her, “she liked to sing Fleetwood Mac.”

“Which songs?”

“You want me to sing, don’t ya?”

“I love The Chain.” She requests lacing fingers with him over her chest.

“Uh-uh, that's not how it works. You have to tell me first.”

“Shane.”

“I know it’s happened before, babe. I heard you talking a few times. What are you afraid of?”

“You dying,” her voice cracks, “I- I saw you die, you and my family and it was my fault.”

“It was just a dream, I’m here. They’re out there somewhere-”

“No, I should’ve been home from the beginning. You were right the other day, I’m scared- I’ve been since the moment I got off the plane. I’ve never felt so helpless, you know?.”

Rambling, her voice breaks into anxious small contained sobs, hurting from the prospect of finding everyone she cares about long gone.

“They needed me and I failed them. I saw all of you turning into roamers- you were all locked inside my father’s house. Windows and doors locked, place was burning down, I could hear the flames but there was no fire around-”

“Babe, it wasn’t real.”

“Felt real, Shane. I would burn my hands every time I tried to push open the door,” she squeezes his fingers tightly, as a few tears slide out of the corner of her eye, “I went all around, clawing at every opening until my hands- but then you all died one by one, and when I finally got in, it was too late- you all started turning.”

“Shh, it’s okay,” he kisses her hairline, “that’s never gonna happen.”

“Maybe not like that.”

“Hey, it’s not gonna happen,” he insists.

Chewing the inside of her mouth, as her twisted mind still spins a hundred of gruesome scenarios.

“Say: _okay babe._” He whispers close, ghosting a thumb pad over her cheek.

“Okay, babe.” She withers reaching for his hand.

Shifting together, he spoons her closely, as he leans his head to softly hum something into her ear. She can’t make it out at first, but as he goes louder she catches the familiar melody.

“Listen to the wind blow… watch the sun rise, run in the shadows...” his voice is nice as it pitches fine, lowering into a deeper tone, singing vaguely the lyrics of the song she requested before, one that he knows by heart.

“She adored you, didn’t she?” 

She feels his face nodding and brushing a quick kiss along her jaw between verses.

**

Come their last day in the cool-de-sac, it’s decided to make one final scavenge trip to the highway, to that initial spot where Sophia disappeared, to salvage what was left behind the first time they were there. 

While Shane and Andrea siphon gas from vehicles into a few jerrycans, Brennan and T-Dog go around collecting tools, other supplies and medicine, if any. They unload six water jugs from the delivery truck and divide all the cargo between the two cars, the Hyundai and their new blue SUV.

They come into some trouble when four hungry walkers appear from the woods chasing a dog that crosses the road to disappear between bushes on the other side of the guardrail.

Luring each walker at a safe distance from each other, they all take care of one almost simultaneously with knives, they don’t see a fifth rotter creeping out behind a tree that almost tackles Shane down. Taking the hit, his body swings without falling, he straightens up promptly as his knife slips out of his hand when throwing his arm to grab the walker by the throat.

Keeping it away at his arm’s length and with his other for the gun hanging on his belt but the walker is surprisingly strong, dead limbs stretching unnaturally and jaw gaping close to nip his forearm.

“Fuck.” 

Holding his weapon now, the walker keeps lunging at him with all its energy, and in less than a second Shane is covered in brain bits after shooting at that close range.

Brennan removes her knife from the eye of the roamer she just ended, and turns around at the sound of the gun going off, to find Shane letting the dead body fall to the ground. Seeing him like that; shirt tainted red, dark blood dripping all over his face, all adorned with brain matter- and her mind jumps to re-play the moment she saw Shane turn into one of those in her mind.

Clearing her throat, she breathes low, “are you okay?”

He’s more annoyed than anything, he wipes his eyes with his clean hand and strides to the road to clean himself with water and one rag he carries in one of the pockets of his cargo pants.

Neatly organizing the new supplies in the trunk, with her mind back to her usual rambling of worries, her eye spots Shane reflected in one of the rear view mirrors walking towards her with no shirt after cleaning himself off.

She grabs and hands a brown t-shirt he had tossed in the backseat and hands it to him when he’s there.

“You don't like the view?” he teases, grinning and slipping into the fresh shirt.

Hiding behind her new found pair of aviators she snagged from a glove box she sighs and keeps sorting things in different boxes at the back of the car.

When she doesn't respond, he leans on the side of the trunk, crossing a leg over the other, “you mad at me or something?”

Without looking at him, she pushes one water jug to the back, her chin vaguely jerks to the side.

“Nothing happened, Liv. You know some of those assholes are stronger.”

Coming to a stop to look at him, her speech fastens a little as her voice goes lower, upset, “I know. And I also know that you’re stronger than any of them. It almost got you cause you didn’t get your sleep this morning cause you were making sure that I did.”

“Would you stop that?” 

“No, Shane- I’ve been weak and you’ve taken care of me and everything else putting yourself last- you almost…” _died_, but she doesn’t finish the sentence, she just shakes her hand in frustration in the air.

“But I didn’t.” 

Abandoning his position to close the gap between them, he gestures at her sunglasses, “may I?”

Allowing him to take the shades off her, he hooks them on the collar of her shirt to frame her jaw on his palms locking eyes with her, she isn’t crying but her eyes are clearly filled with concern.

“Are you listening to you right now? You’re not weak, you were hurt- have you put yourself in the line for people you didn’t know, huh? you call that weak? Babe, you’re the strongest person I know- I'm trying to understand what’s going on in that pretty head of yours but I can’t if you don’t tell me. ”

Her eyes close for a few seconds before answering. “I just can’t lose you Shane- I didn’t think I’d love you this much when we started this, you know?”

Swallowing, he presses his forehead over hers, sliding his palms down to her neck, “I know- of course I know. Didn’t occur to me either. You think that’s making you weak, loving me?”

“Maybe.” Smiling nervously with a second thought, “I don’t know anymore. I feel like it’s finally hitting me, all of it, everything feels like shit- except for you and that’s what scares me the most, that you’re the only thing keeping me going, if you’re not there... ”

“You’re not gonna lose me, I promise.” He states confidently pulling his head back to find her gaze.

“You can’t promise something like that.” Her brow narrows.

Scoffing, “what d’you mean I can’t?”

Her shoulder shrugs, “you can’t.”

“You’re unbelievable sometimes,” he utters amused, head tilting, “what ever happened to that optimistic asshole that believed that a little girl was still alive?”

“I think she switched places with you.” Her mouth flashes a light smile.

“C’mere.” Pulling her flush against him, he drapes his arms around her neck with hers circling around his torso.

“We made each other better, you said that, remember? As long as we are together...”

“We’re golden.” She finishes.

“That’s right we are.”

“Hey, lovebirds.” T interrupts, “are we done? Heat’s gettin’ hot.”

**

Everything is good to go, they’ve mapped out their routes and packed their cars, so at noon they are back to rest for the last few hours left there.

He’s showered all the walker remains from his body and takes over the bed to finally get some rest. She’s right- all these past days he’s been working tirelessly, taking the dreaded night shift to watch over one of the most boring neighborhoods, safe and quiet nevertheless.

Nearly naked and laying on his stomach with his arms bent underneath his pillow, with covers and sheets pushed scrambled at the end of the bed. Olivia finishes undressing down to her panties and crawls in with him, swinging a leg over his hips to sit on his butt.

Her fingertips rake along his spine before leaning.

“How tired are you?” her mouth nips at his earlobe.

“Shit, if you ask like that… I’m not tired at all.” 

He makes an attempt to flip his body around but her palms, planted firmly on his shoulders, stop him from doing so. Kneading the muscles at the curve of his neck, applying pressure evenly on both sides, he lets out a sigh as his neck goes limp. Closing his eyes, settling comfortable underneath her control, hoping not to fall asleep as she massages his back.

Working a way down his spine, her thumbs dig hard on the toned muscles of his body, bringing him to ache in pleasure as a groan escapes from his mouth.

Biting her lower lip curved in a smirk, she applies pressure firmly, stopping occasionally to run her fingertips very lightly or brush her lips sensually on the area her hands just passed, adding a low hum when she does the latter.

All those combinations get him completely aroused, his hips shift a few times, adjusting his hard dick that points up to his lower abdomen now.

Bowing forward, her bare chest pressed against his back, she gives him a hint to make space for her arm that slips underneath his torso to grab his length, stiff as ever, she pumps him leisurely with her good hand.

Teeth scraping on his jaw, “you want me?”

Shane groans louder at the question and handy work, pushing himself a little to the side to give her more room.

“Christ, I want you so much.” 

Finding her mouth, his kiss is not other than sloppy in that position, breathing warmly on her mouth he nips and tugs her bottom lip before turning around to face her.

She moves with him bending over to rest on top of his chest, hips grinding over his bulge easily, as his palms roam the curve of her ass, pushing her down to him as he bucks at times up to her.

One of her palms lays flat on his collarbone, with her other arm curled around his neck, breathing slowly on one side of his mouth. His fingers sneak under the rear elastic of her panties, pushing them to the side, to brush her slick folds up to her swollen clit.

“Shit, I love when you get like that.” He utters low pressing lightly over it. “Is that all for me, babe?”

Her gasp gets interrupted by a scoff and an eye-roll, “God, you’re such a guy. It’s part you, part me loving sex.”

“Loving sex with me?” he teases pressing harder in a circle.

“It’s all for you, babe.”

Brow knitted, she gasps full of desire- her lips part wider to seize his mouth with hunger as her hips rock over those fingers teasing at her entrance to sink on them.

“Fuck me.” She mumbles on his mouth, extending her arm to grab a rubber from the nightstand.

She doesn't need to tell him twice, his mind was already on it. He removes his fingers off her and bends up with her, her ass slides to his thighs as she takes out the condom to wrap his dick. 

He looks down watching her doing it, hands roaming on her legs, he plants a kiss on her forehead. Once he’s settled, with a wink she gets on her knees and spins on the bed between his legs and sits back on his erection.

“Christ,” he grunts on at the back of her neck, his palm smooths along her thigh up to her still covered groin, “you want it like that?”

“Yes.” She circles her hips a couple times before bending forwards while he hooks the sides of her underwear to pull them down her thighs.

As she releases one leg at a time, he gets on his knees to get out of his boxers too. Getting a better position behind her ass, his fingers run down her spine, causing her to curve her back up to his chest. 

Her hair gets tossed over one of his shoulders as he buries his face on the other side to draw the crook of her neck with his tongue. His hands, hungry for touch, travel down her chest, with her palms ghosting over them. 

One stops to massage her boob, as the other trails further down to settle between her legs. Olivia gasps, pressing her head back against him, she molds the hold he has on her breast to grip stronger.

Shane’s mouth switches to the other side of her neck when he catches a glance at both of them in the big mirror over the dresser. 

“God, look at you.” His hand glides up to her chin, moving her head to the side, making her see the reflection of their form, “you’re perfect.”

As he goes back to work on her skin, she breathes a loud sigh observing Shane’s handling her body- she could just come from watching him touch her like that: attaching his mouth to her neck, his grip tightening around her nipple, while the fingers of his other hand get lost in her slickness, caressing firmly with one sliding into her, making her fluids drip along her inner thigh.

“Shane,” she moans. 

Releasing her body, his palm follows her back as she bows to rest her forearms on the mattress.

Her fists anticipate, balling the fitted sheet underneath. When he lines up with her, he’s quick to fit his cock inside her walls. With both at the brink already, they breathe lod almost at the same time.

When he starts thrusting, sharp and steady, her head hangs as her eyes shut. Gripping firmly on her hips, keeping her still in the same position, that same position that’s granting him deeper reach into her. His tip feels like leaking already, he has to fight not to come that second. The way she feels on his hands, the warmth of her cut, that beautiful cry at his name when he slams into her faster, the fantastic view of that that he catches at the corner eye on the mirror... it only serves to make the struggle more difficult.

When she rushes a hand underneath her, reaching for her clit, he bends over to curl his arm around her and do it himself.

Pressing on her swollen bud, “you wanna come?” 

“Yeah… there,” her breath falters, “do it harder, please.” 

“I got ya.”

His torso strains in a curve over her body holding her with one arm around her chest. With great skill he manages to keep different paces: his thrusts are sudden and rough but his fingers rub quick and solid on the clit until she peaks- coming hard, as her body tense as the wave crash into her, melting through his fingers her walls flutter around his cock that releases at that moment she spills a curse at his name.

His groan is loud and has to keep himself steady from falling on top of her. When his muscles relax, his arm unclasps from around her to hold himself on the bed as she lowers her body down, placing her face on the mattress. 

He frees his dick from the latex and lazily lays on his side with hand on her lower back and a leg between hers.

“You’re amazing.”

“So are you.” 

While they recover, the room is filled with silence, only broken by a few birds hanging on a tree just outside their window. Smiling closely face to face, their lips meet a few times between warm exhales, it’s easy and ever so sweet. Eyes closed, her nose scrunches against his cheek, as his fingers glide feather light on her spine giving her goosebumps. 

**

After a quick shower, she heads downstairs leaving Shane sleep in for the rest of the afternoon. 

Walking with Andrea around the neighborhood twice before heading outside to check the snares she had set up less than half a mile in the woods. They stop at the gate to kill a few walkes that were crowding behind it, a few over ten- with the bars between them, they work together taking them all out. Having to move the bodies out of the way is just as annoying. 

Once they’re done, in a matter of minutes they get to the trap setting to find two rabbits caught in them.

Tying her hair in a ponytail, Olivia crouches down to get the animals and Andrea catches a deep shade of red and purple from a recent love bite on one side of her neck.

“Gotta be careful with those,” she quips pointing at her neck, “someone might think you’ve been bitten.”

Olivia’s not the one to get embarrassed easily but her cheeks burn slightly for a second as she touches that mark Shane left three hours ago.

When she comes back up, her lips hold a grin with a shy jerk of her chin.

“I’d tell him to be careful if I didn’t enjoy it just as much.” She responds cheeky.

“Great, keep rubbing it in.”

The both break into laughter as they start walking back to the property.

“So you didn’t have anyone before.” Asks Olivia.

“Just a magic wand that worked wonders.” Andrea keeps joking in all seriousness. “I miss it.”

“What? You didn’t pack it for your trip?”

Minding her step over a large rock, “looking back, I should have.” 

Laughing again, they come into a walker that Andrea puts down with her blade.

Olivia’s head swivels, scanning the area for more to see a small hoard by a clearing roaming the grounds- but they’re following something else: Miles away they both can clearly see heavy smoke tainting the sky grey.

“Is that-?”

“Fire.” Swallowing hard, her stomach drops- she already had this gut feeling something bad was going to happen, the smoke feels like a bad omen of that dream she had earlier in the morning.

“Let’s go back.”

Hurried, they get back in time before walkers can know they were there. Andrea stays on watch in the small security booth by the gate as Olivia informs T who goes patrolling the cul-de-sac.

Reaching the door of their room, hand gripping the nob she hesitates as her forehead presses on the wood. Taking a deep breath she decides not to wake him up, not when nothing has happened.

So she puts all her worries into making their last dinner. Cleaning the animals she caught thoroughly as she used to to fry the pieces with some oil, wishing she’d had more ingredients and the time to marinate the meat. At least she has a bottle of red wine, that was found in a cellar, to pair it with.

The fire keeps drawing some walkers to their walls, not many, just some that get lost. Leaving them with a pile of bodies outside.

“We might need to leave earlier,” T says.

Right before the sun sets, she wakes him up for dinner, unwillingly, as he was so cute laying naked on his stomach. His breath stirs a very light snoring and he groans a little when she calls his name.

Sitting on the edge of the bed she leans to whisper in his ear, fingers scratching softly on his nape. “Wake up, babe.”

“Huh,” he mutters with a hum, burying his face in the pillow.

“I’m sorry.” She presses a kiss on his neck. “I think something’s happening.”

Squinting his head lifts just an inch, “everyone okay?”

“Yeah, yeah- didn’t wanna worry you but we have walkers piling up by the door and there’s a fire miles away. I think it’s drawing them there.”

“Good thing we’re leaving in the morning.” He utters husky flipping to his side. “Please don’t ever think that you can worry me, got it?”

Nodding with a smile, “made dinner.” 

“Is that what smells so good?” grabbing her hand to pull her body closer.

“Yep.”

“Now, we’re even.”

“We are?” she frowns, amused and confused.

“You owed me dinner.”

Her jaw drops, “I did not owe you nothing.”

“Yeah, you did. You got your sweet dessert the other day but I didn’t get my dinner.”

Laughing, “is that so? Well, in that case we’re even.”

Then she stands up muttering, “owe you my ass.”

“Heard you.”

**

Sitting on the porch after dinner, they’ve started a game of toasting to the things they’re going to miss from that place, each of them with a glass of red wine in their hand.

“To running water,” T-Dog raises his drink and takes a long sip.

“To beds,” Olivia follows.

“To privacy,” Andrea adds, raising a brow.

Shane spins the glass on his palm a couple times, staring at the liquid move, “to safety.” 

When Andrea and T-Dog retire for the night to rest, Shane and Olivia stay on lookout.

They settle a few yards from to the gate and lean on the bumper of a car, watching that distant fire burning bright now as the day darkens.

“Should we do something?” Olivia asks between teeth, chewing on a piece of her favorite candy: black licorice.

“Call the fire department- but oh, no phones, or fire department.” He says in all seriousness.

“Well, at least most of them find their way to it.”

Closing in, he takes a piece of the black vine dangling between her lips.

“Hey!” She scolds him, amused.

“What?” He questions funny, squinting at her.

They’re both used to stake-outs and staying quiet for most of the time but as soon as they get bored, they get back to their usual banter.

“What did you think of me when we met?” 

Turning his head to the side, he scoffs, “that you were gonna kill me.”

“I was going to,” she states nodding, “you were flanking me like an asshole.”

“Wasn’t flanking you, was checking your ass.” He counters.

“Yeah, right.”

He smugly grins sweet talking. “It’s true, shit- moment I saw you in all your G.I. Jane getup, phew… woulda left you shoot me after seeing that fine piece of meat you call a behind.” 

Shaking her head, she burst into laughing, trying to grasp all the thought he put into that, or not at all. Unable to make up her mind whether to smack him or kiss him.

“You’re such a bullshiter. Meant after that- you know when you knew me _knew me._” 

They get interrupted by three new roamers at the entrance. Shane takes care of two, leaving the other for her, she uses her good hand as usual but as she takes a step back, her bad arm gets a cramp.

Placing his hand on her lower back, “hows that arm?”

“Was good until now.” She winces tugging carefully at the bandage to check there’s no blood. “It’ll pass.”

“Shit.” 

He promptly removes his hand to get a grip of the shotgun on his shoulder to the sound of a car racing towards them, the headlights flicker and she trains her gun up to the road.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the cliffhanger, it was getting too long and I had to cut somewhere. I'm halfway through the next one though.


	15. Airfield

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Picks up the second after the previous chapter. Mind the warnings in the tags, this one features graphic depictions of violence.
> 
> Trigger Warning: miscarriage.

Shane and Olivia are ready to fire their weapons when the car comes to a stop at the gate and the man who gets out of the car is Glenn, dripping blood and tears all over his face, shirt darkened in sweat, he holds his hands up in the air.

“I need your help.” He pants, trying to shout but he falters pointing at the back of the car, “Dale is hurt.”

Lowering their weapons they’re quick to open the entrance to let him in. Shane closes the gate once the car is inside and Olivia sits on the passenger side guiding him to the house.

Shane lags behind, making sure no one is coming after.

Calling up to the rest of the group, they all haul Dale inside to settle him in one of the beds, removing his shirt to find the bullet hole in his stomach.

“Jesus, what happened?” Andrea rushes to apply pressure to the wound. “Where’s everybody?”

“There was a- a fire,” Glenn stutters, pacing with a bottle of water on his hands, “those people came and- and they took- we have to go back for them!”

“The fire? Was that from the farm?” Asks T-Dog.

Glenn nods.

“Can we leave that for later,” Andrea raises her voice, “Dale’s dying!”

They all move fast around the bed, bringing alcohol and the medical supplies they have to pick what they need, with no knowledge at all of how to proceed, hesitating whether to take the bullet out or just sew the damage over it.

“I- if we take it out, there’s no way to know the damage inside, we need Hershel.”

“We have to. We can’t just let him die.” Glenn adds.

Pale as a ghost, Dale is barely hanging, as he starts to doze off, Andrea shouts at him, “hey, look at me, you’re gonna be okay!”

“Andrea.” Dale says, breathless, reaching for her, ending with his bloody hand print on her forearm before passing out.

All staring at each other, Olivia checks on his pulse and breathing, sharing a glance with Shane before deciding to take out the bullet herself.

“Hold him down,” she orders, looking at both Shane and T.

Picking up the pliers, she stands in front of Andrea, motioning her head to let her know she’s ready.

“Are you sure you can do it?”

Breathing through her nose, she nods. Andrea removes her hands and Olivia pours alcohol over the wound and starts digging for the bullet, she notes the metal hitting against it but she’s unable to pick it up with them.

“Shit,” she throws them to the side and digs with her fingers until it is out. That’s when Andrea hands her a needle with string and she starts sewing parts that seem torn without really recognizing the true damage inside.

She manages at least to stop the bleeding. Andrea cleans the blood from Dale, after that they all gather in the living room to hear what happened from Glenn.

“They- they brought a horde and set the barn on fire- we- the other day,” he struggles to get the words out. 

Shane draws a silent snarl, impatiently.

Glenn gulps from his bottle and sits on the couch. When he can finally speak, he recounts all that has happened since they left the farm.

From the first night he and Rick went looking for Hershel into town and the trouble they got themselves into when they had to kill three of them. Them being the assholes that took Sophia in the first place. 

That got them a few days off their back, but they came back today to retaliate and get what they wanted from the beginning: the women. So they took Lori, Maggie, Beth and Patricia.

Today, they brought a horde and started the fire as a distraction, as some of the group tried to put it out- those dirtbags got to the house to kidnap the women. Starting a shootout where Dale got hit and Jimmy got killed. 

The rest of the group got alive, as far as he knows they all ran in different directions. Glenn got in the car with Dale and tried to find them but the horde stopped him from doing so. Of all places, he thought of coming here first, assuming the others would do the same.

Shane paces around the living, rubbing his head, blood boiling inside. “Told you it wasn't safe there, man.”

Trying to concoct a plan, she stays quiet by the kitchen counter, arms crossed, swallowing all the new information.

“The airfield.” She says.

“What about it?”

“That’s what they are, right? We just go there and take them back. Worry about the others later.”

“We don’t know if they took them back there…”

“They’re dumbasses, of course they took them to the same place.” She states.

Glenn looks at both of them as they argue. “Guys, we have to leave now, we can’t let them-” he sobs, pleading exhausted, “please.”

A familiar voice shouts a few times from outside, and they all run to the porch.

At the gate is Daryl, Carol and Sophia.

**

Instinctively, she puts everything aside and gears up- slipping into her fatigues, dusting off her body armor, ready to rage war. It aggravates her more than anything, the way women are treated just for that- being women. 

Then, they go over it once more with Glenn- on how many they were, the kind of weapons he saw and map out the fastest route to the airstrip 30 miles away.

Shane pulls her to the side, and takes her to the backyard, “I think you should stay.”

“The hell am I, Shane.”

“You’re still hurt.”

“I’m fine. And you need me, you think I’m gonna let you go alone?”

Given the irony of both of them trying to protect each other, they both smile for a second. His palms find her neck, his forehead resting against hers, as her hands reach up to grip on his forearms.

“We’re going in blind, babe. If we do this… I ain’t negotiating or compromising like Rick- people are gonna die.” 

“I know.” She breathes loudly through her nose. “That’s why you need me there.”

**

Leaving Carol and Sophia to care for Dale, the group takes off in the middle of the night in a convoy led by Brennan, Shane and Glenn in one car, Andrea and T-Dog in a second one and Daryl last on his bike.

Avoiding the horde, they have to take a different road. In over half an hour they get close to their land. Pulling up a mile from it, hiding the cars on the side of the road. They start walking, with Olivia leading the group- she manages to see clearly in the dark with her vision gear.

When they’re close to the private airfield’s chain link fence, they halt and wait for any movement inside, but being at the back of the hangar, that’s blocking the view to the rest of the property, they circle around the fence, keeping a safe distance until they reach the residential area with five houses.

As far as Glenn could see in the middle of the chaos, they took a few hits but around 10 of them got away in a van.

By the vehicles parked at the gate, there are two guys half-drunk with beers in their hands guarding the field and throwing empty bottles over the fence without really paying attention to their surroundings.

The field is dimly lit but visible from a dying flood light hooked on the fence.

Inside the houses, most of them are dark except two that reveal light and movement from the windows.

“We need to draw ‘em out.”

Glenn usually hates being set up to execute the most dangerous shit for the rest, but now he’d anything to Maggie back, so he quickly agrees to create distraction.

While the others use bolt cutters to make an opening on the fence, they wait for Glenn’s signal.

He runs to the back of the hangar and using a flare gun he shoots at one of the top windows, breaking the glass, he loads the gun and shoots a second flare, causing the two guards to leave their position and call for the others.

As soon as most of these guys split up to check the commotion in the building, Glenn runs back to the group, that’s stealthy making their way inside and through the hole they just made in the fence.

Divided in two teams led by Shane and Olivia- Shane’s stays on lookout while Olivia’s enters the first house. All rooms are clear, except the basement, where they find a room bolt locked with 4 scared unknown women.

“Shh, it’s gonna be okay,” Olivia tells them calmly, gesturing to get up and follow.

Suddenly, her hearing is filled with guns going off outside.

“Shit.”

Once the kidnappers figured out they were being fooled, they went back to find Shane’s team (T and Daryl) shooting at them.

“Stay down until I come back.” She orders before climbing the stairs with Glenn, leaving Andrea guarding them. 

Outside, Shane shoots with precision at those crossing the airfield that are stupid enough to do so, taking out 3 of them.

Daryl and T-Dog fire and kill another two of the kidnappers. Some of them, still in the hiding, fire back hitting T in the leg.

The remaining that went around another path are now taking cover in the gap of the third house, occasionally firing at them.

T-Dog sits on the ground with a bullet on his leg, as Shane and Daryl lean against the wall on the side of that first house.

When she gets to them, they’re crouched down as Daryl peaks on the corner, hoping to get a glimpse of the other men.

“We need to check the other houses,” She tells them, mirroring their position.

“Fuck!” Daryl utters as he fires a shot and misses his target.

Propping her rifle on her shoulder, head tilting at Shane, she huffs, “you’re not gonna like this.” 

“Don’t.” He grabs her arm. “Please.”

“Don’t worry, I have cover,” her free hand pats her armor twice, a little too smugly for his liking.

“Damn it, Brennan!” He mutters low, “you ain’t doing that alone.”

“I know, you got my back, right?”

Nodding unwillingly, “be careful.”

Like second nature, she centers herself with calm and determination, every move is carried swiftly from the moment she goes around the corner of the house- with her back glued to the wall, her hand opens the front door to turn off the lights and lowers her body to the ground as a string of bullets start piercing windows and walls rapidly.

She waits till they stop firing to load their weapons, that’s when she quickly gets on her feet and starts running, closing the distance between the two houses until she reaches the front of the other house.

Having the advantage now, as those jerks are mostly hammered and slow to reload, with her weapon trained up and without even thinking, she’s quick to pivot and shoot sharply two of them- making the others retreat from their position to get cover behind the next house.

Again, her back is pressed against the wall, breathing deeply for a beat.

Shane has been paralleling her moves from the other side, he’s now in the opposite wall of the house. When he sees them run- he aims and fires at one of them that falls mid-run.

“Three down.” He counts.

Her head peaks around the corner and sees Shane using military signs to tell her to run after them after he starts shooting.

Her hand draws and OK up and waits for his cue.

When he starts firing fast, taking a step forward after each shot- the last two take cover as Brennan’s feet run like hell to find them laying on the ground. One of them sees her and aims, but her finger squeezes faster on the trigger than his- putting a bullet on his head.

Shane stops to reload, then he walks towards her position, alert of his surroundings for any others.

Last one is down to pleading, without tears or any real emotion in his words, he lets go of his weapon to push his body very slowly off the ground. Olivia's barrel follows his every move as his hands go up mid-air.

“You got us, okay? You got them. I ain’t gonna hurt you, sweetheart.”

It’s not the fake plea for his life or the patronizing emphasis on the _sweetheart,_ her mind was made before he surrendered his weapon, since she saw the other piece tucked in his waistband and under his shirt.

On the corner of her eye, she sees Shane stealthy approaching several yards away and nodding at her.

She gives the dirtbag some time, as her shotgun goes half way down- he reaches at his back and all of a sudden a bullet is stuck in his throat. His body plummets with blood pouring out of his jugular, gurgling, he tries to stop the bleeding but he fastly drowns on it.

Her mouth huffs and she spins to face Shane, in a second her body is being pulled to the ground by a stray one that was hiding in the dark spot of the trees.

“Olivia!” He runs to her.

It only lasts a few intense seconds before he gets to her- The new man straddles her torso as he takes and throws her rifle out of reach, pinning her bad arm underneath his knee, as her good one keeps eluding his grab. 

She fights his hold, full force, grunting at the back of her throat, her feet pushing on the ground trying to squirm away. Her hand’s heel hits his chin before he manages to get a hold of it to twist and press against her Kevlar.

“Look at you, all feisty,” he hisses coarse, fisting the handle of his only weapon: a knife, “I’d have so much fun with you.”

Then, her knee bashes into his back. He growls low, more pissed than anything, and moves the blade over her throat- before it sinks in, Shane’s arm is linked around his neck, pulling him off her in a choke-hold, he drags his body like a ragdoll to the nearby tree where he starts bashing the guy’s head over and over on the trunk until he’s no more than meat and bones.

“Walkers!” Andrea shouts.

Brennan winces lifting half her body up to sit at that call.

Shane zoned out for a moment staring down at the attacker laying cold in the ground- when his head turns, he sees everyone running across the field.

His eyes are on Olivia for only half a second before rushing back to her.

“I’m okay.” She gestures but he helps her up anyway.

“He hurt you,” he pants heavily, as his forehead falls against hers, “I shoulda seen him…”

Her hand moves to his collarbone to feel his pulse pumping on her fingertips.

“Shane, It’s okay- I’m okay,” she breathes with difficulty, “didn’t see him either, babe.”

She looks back to see all the walkers filling the residential area from the gap they left on the fence, “they’re closing in.”

Getting to the van, Daryl has taken the wheel with Glenn on the passenger seat, they hop at the back with the rest and close the doors behind them as the vehicle takes off.

“Shane?” Lori utters between tears, “thank God, how did you-?”

Shane’s eyes dart all over wide-opened, scanning all the new faces as they go back to find Lori’s, his blood boils when he sees the bruises forming on one of her cheeks and arms.

“Glenn, he came to us.”

“Carl?” She asks in a sob.

His stare bows down with a light shake of his chin, “we don’t know.”

“Oh, my god,” her palm covers her mouth, “Rick?”

“We’ll find them.”

**

Feels like a never ending night…

After a long ride back, the first thing they do is getting T-Dog’s leg fixed. Patricia and one of the women they’ve rescued, who is a nurse practitioner, do a great job on taking that bullet out and stitching him up. 

Dale is on and off, barely hanging on for his life. Andrea sits with him for the rest of the night, giving him water for the most part and holding his hand with the occasional visit of Glenn.

Everyone settles in small groups in different houses, the new members get fed and accommodated in one of them, not really wanting to split up after everything they’ve been through.

They still have to worry about finding Rick, Carl and Hershel.

Olivia voices an exhaustion sigh getting out of her vest and tossing it to the chair. Approaching Shane, who’s sitting on the edge of the bed, while her arms go around his neck, his hands glide up to curl around her waist, face tilting he places a lingering kiss on her stomach and over the fabric of her shirt, as her head bows to rest her cheek on top of his buzz cut with her fingers raking softly at his nape.

“I’m sorry that he did that to you.”

“Wasn’t your fault,” sounding a bit croaky, she clears her throat, “others got worse, I’m lucky you were there. I’m sorry you had to do that for me.”

Pulling his head back to look slightly up to her eyes, “I’d do anything for you, Liv.”

Moved, her eyes well up as her head leans to capture his lips, then she spins a little to sit on his lap sideways, holding on around his neck, his arms circle her body with his palm soothing on her lower back.

“I’d do anything for you, too, Shane Walsh.” She smiles on his cheek.

**

Snoozing off for no more than two hours, when they wake up Shane takes off quite early in the morning with Glenn and Maggie to look for the others, leaving Olivia holding the fort.

She’s making rounds checking on everyone when she finds Lori filling a glass of water in the kitchen. Olivia rushes to her side when she notes the blood stain at the back of her jeans spreading down to her thighs.

“Are you hurt? Did they-” She asks worried.

Lori’s hand is a little shaky as she takes a sip of water, shaking her head, assuming she’s referring to her bruises, “no, this was when they grabbed us- I tried to fight them and they grabbed me...”

“No, there’s blood on your pants.”

Placing the glass on the counter, her forearm bends over her stomach as she looks down, tears start spilling out of her eyes, “oh, my god.”

“Hey, it’s okay, let’s get you down- I’ll bring Nina,” referring to the NP, her hand hovers on Lori’s back to take her to the bedroom.

She quickly grabs Olivia’s arm, her face grimaces between sobs, “I’m… I’m pregnant. Nobody knows, please, you can’t-”

Processing the information with her usual steadfast calmness to comfort her, “if that’s the case you need someone, okay? I’ll only tell her. I promise.”

“Okay, okay-” Lori nods, shuddering as she lets Olivia guide her to the room.

When she brings Nina, who does a thorough check up to confirm she’s lost the baby. They both help Lori clean up and get into comfortable clothes before getting in bed.

Brennan sits on a chair next to her, unwilling to leave her alone until the others get back.

She lays on her side with her arm under the pillow, “I’m sorry I didn’t trust you,” Lori mumbles.

“Shh, don’t even worry about that now.”

“No, you’ve gone way and beyond for this group and I never thanked you for what you did for Carl and Sophia.”

She leans forwards, propping her elbows on her knees, “you don’t have to.”

“I was-” and Lori keeps rambling, “I thought you changed him somehow, and he changed, but not because of you.”

Inhaling deeply, eyes darting all over the floor, her thumbs fidget as she keeps listening to her.

“It was that night at the school, right?”

Olivia nods, sighing, “Lori…”

“No, it’s okay- he was right, he’s always kept us safe. He would have kept this baby safe.”

She knew where she was going with that but she needed to hear it for some reason, “does he know?”

“No, I couldn’t bring myself to do it after Rick came back.”

She leans back on the chair’s backrest, glimpsing through the window for a beat, speechless.

“Are you gonna tell him?” Asks Lori.

Her eyes go back to the bed, “I can’t keep it to myself, Lori- if you don’t wanna do it, that’s fine but… I don’t think I can lie to him.”

“He’ll see it right through you, right?”

Huffing, knowing how true that is, “you could do it, you know?”

Her face crumples sobbing on the pillow, “I messed up. I didn’t want to have this baby and God knew.”

Tearing up, Olivia leans with her arm extended to ease a hand on Lori’s arm, “No, this wasn’t God, Lori. It was those assholes dragging you away from your family.”

“Can you stay for a while?”

“Yeah, I’ll stay.”

She ends up staying for half an hour, after drinking some tea Nina brought, Lori fell asleep.

**

Shortly after Shane is back with Rick, Carl and Hershel. He found them back on the road making their way to them on foot.

Her eyes lit up watching him walking and trading jokes with Carl with a hand on the boy’s shoulder for a moment.

Pulling both Shane and Rick to the side, she tells them what happened, keeping the other part for later- she didn’t want to say it in front of Rick, but he saw it on the way she kept avoiding his eyes.

Rick goes to find Lori and stay with her while she rests, while they stroll along the sidewalk to their house.

“Liv,” stopping mid-way, “I didn’t know.”

Swallowing, she writes him off, “I know, you don’t have to explain.”

“It was reckless of us- me, mostly me,” he counters angry with himself, ducking his head, “I always fuck everything up .”

“Shane.” She furrows cupping his jaw, “look at me, we’re only human, yeah? We fuck up everyday.”

“You don’t.”

“I _do plenty_, babe,” she states firmly with a head nod. “You should talk to her later.” 

“I thought we were leaving.”

“Just a little delay, we can leave in the afternoon... I think you all need a proper goodbye.” Olivia wholeheartedly suggests.

“She needs to hear it, you know? She’s blaming herself for all that’s happened for not listening to you- for how it ended… it should come for you.”

“I don’t even know what to say to her.”

“ You were friends before, just- be her friend.”

“God, I don’t deserve you.” His words come with him pulling her flush against his chest into a hug. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too.” She smiles into his shirt, hugging him back just as tight.


	16. Trapped

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's still the same day as the previous chapter and goes a little different from what I usually write but it came to me this way.

He’s royally fucked. Big time.

In the dark the fire strikes brighter in front of him, he hustles, tossing his shotgun and the walkie-talkie inside, he squirms down through the sunroof of a car to take cover from the hundreds of walkers cornering him. Almost with no breath left, he slides the panel back into position and checks that all doors and windows are shut, the vehicle gets completely surrounded by rotters.

His head swivels between curses before letting fall back against the seatrest. With no back up this time, and the incessant growling filling his hearing like white noise.

Exhausted, he picks up the walkie to call for Olivia, spacing a few calls to the speaker.

“Baby, are you there?” 

When there is no answer at the other end, he presses the device against his forehead, clenching his eyes shut hoping she’s safe somewhere far away from there. She is, she has to be…

“Please, if you’re listening... don’t come back for me.” Tears spill out of his eyes, talking into the void. “...Fuck, I know you’re coming back… we shoulda left this morning like we were supposed to, I know you stayed because of everything… it ain’t a way for me out of this… but there is for you… please, please go home...if I ever… I’ll find you, I promise.”

_Sha..._ Her voice breaks in for a millisecond at the other end but that’s all he gets.

Leaving the walkie on the seat next to him, with no plan other than to wait for the walkers to clear the space on their own.He counts his last bullets: five. He takes one of them out of the chamber of his handgun to keep in his pocket. If he’s going down, he’s not returning as one of those things, that’s something he’s sure about.

Then he leans to place his elbows on his knees, with his forehead resting on his palms covering the gruesome scene lurking around him. If these are his final moments, he doesn’t want to go with the memory of all the damned rotten faces on the other side of the glass.

**

He couldn't say it was fast, it was a long miserable day that started less than 24 hours ago after the rescue of the rest of the group, then it all snowballed till this point. 

First Rick.

Bringing him to Wiltshire States was the first mistake, if it wasn’t for Carl being out there with him, he could’ve left his former partner to fend for himself in a ditch. He didn’t only manage to put everyone in danger twice, but he did it a third time. Shane thought maybe this time was different, that Rick changed somehow after the riff with the Nebraskan guys.

Then it was Lori.

He still doesn’t know how he is supposed to feel about what happened...

He was told more than once that he went a little overboard with his way of handling things, when he saw her lying broken on the bed, all pointed to no, he should have tried even harder to protect them, even if that meant more drastic measures.

His heart breaks for her. Not really processing the part about the baby being his, not yet, it feels pretty surreal that he could have been a father in just a few months. He did screw up badly, he should’ve known better than to be so terribly irresponsible to sneak around with her like that, even lying about Rick- felt like the only choice to get them to safety at the time, that was the only thing that drove him, and still does. 

Taking the chair by the window, chewing the inside of his lip with fidgety thumbs playing behind his lace fingers. Unsure of what to say or how to make it better for her. Out of habit, the first question that pops into his mind is _how are you feeling?_, he quickly shuts it down before reaching down to his mouth. That’s an answer that’s written all over her.

She breaks the silence, “I’m sorry I didn’t trust you, if only I could go back and make it different somehow… this wouldn’t have happened.”

“No, Lor, you don’t have to apologize for anything, you were trying to protect your family, I get that.”

“You were part of that family too, Shane… we made things complicated and... I was mad you lied about Rick but I should’ve seen that you were right all along. Not about lying, but about the farm not being safe, I needed it to be safe… for Carl, Sophia and… the baby.”

“That’s all I wanted for you, Lori, to keep you safe. I’d try harder if I knew...”

Lori sighs and wipes a few tears off her cheeks, “I know. Would you ever forgive me for not telling you?”

“There’s nothing to forgive, I get it, you know? Would you forgive me too.”

She nods sweeping a hand over her cheek to clear her tears, she sniffles, “Are you really leaving?” 

“Yeah, in a few hours.”

“You really love her.” She states without question.

“I do.”

Fuck, he does love her...

Throwing a fit in the small space, his body is suddenly stiff pressed against the seat and he finds himself kicking the back of the front seat a few times, drawing more attention to himself than necessary as the walkers go ravenous at the sound of him and the walkie cracking a few scrambled words: 

_late -- don’t -- if -- will -- to -- same…_

“Liv?” he speaks into the walkie before it goes soundless again.

Karma brings him half-way defeated to stop and him to relieve his worst moments. He did let Otis to die for him in a situation exactly like this- guess it was coming for him all along. Only this time, there’s no one at the other side to get to his rescue.

When he opens his eyes for a beat his mind tricks him into seeing Dale in one of those decaying faces. 

He faded out slowly just a few hours ago, right before everything went to shit. Maybe it’s him, they didn’t have time to put him out of his misery when he turned…

While Rick reaches over the man’s eyes to close them and motions his head to Shane to follow him to the kitchen. He does the same to Olivia and the three of them have a little meeting where Rick tells them what he learned at the CDC, what he knew all along: everyone is infected, if you die, no matter how, you wake up as a walker.

“Jenner told you?” Shane questions low.

“Just before we left.”

“And you kept that information all this time… why?”

“Cause I wasn’t sure, for all I know he could be lying but if it turns out to be true…”

“We need everyone out of the room, and out of the house.” Olivia finishes.

“Did you know something about it?” Rick locks eyes with her.

“Some of it. I wasn’t sure either.”

“Well, if we need proof.” Shane’s head tilts.

So they get everyone out of the house and get that front door shut. Not without question, everyone knows something’s up and they start voicing their worries and questioning why they can’t bury him yet.

As Rick answers some of those questions on the porch, Shane eyes her walking towards the main gate on her own.

“Hey, what is it?” he voices before catching up with her.

Turning around, she waves a hand in the air with a finger pointing up, not really sure what she’s hearing, “Do you hear that- that buzzing?”

“Is it the horde?”

“Might be.” Holding her rifle between the bars, her eye on the scope, observing the far horizon of the road, spotting a group of walkers meandering and spreading to the side of the road.

“Part of it at least, they’re trailing off.” Lowering her weapon. “Something’s not right.” 

“What’d you mean?”

“Heard one of them got away at the farm, the kid… Randall?”

“Shit, are you sure?”

“They didn’t tell us everything, Shane… got it from Carol when you were out looking for Rick. That night at the bar, he was injured and Rick took him to the farm, got himself patched up and sent him on his way.” 

Shane’s head turns to look at them by the house and then back at her. “My fucking god, he’s gonna get them all killed.”

“I’m done, Shane.” Olivia states, propping her weapon on the wall, leaning on the booth next to the gate, getting some shadow from the structure. “We’re running in circles... it’s time to move on.”

Shane rubs the back of his neck for a moment and leaves his shotgun next to hers, placing a hand on her hip as reassurance, with a gentle squeeze, “okay, after Dale we take off, alright?”

With a nod her head tilts to the side, placing a hand over his bicep, as his head ducks to press a soft kiss on her exposed neck before resting his forehead against hers.

“This isn’t how I wanned today to go, you know?” Shane whispers.

“No?” 

“No,” his mouth quirks up a half smirk, placing his other palm to the other side of her hip,“I was gonna make you breakfast, get it to bed before you woke up, then _love_ you a couple times after…”

“A couple times, huh?” She bites her lower lip, “it was a good plan, Walsh.”

He laughs softly before capturing her lips, with a little tug on her bottom one before sliding inside her mouth with no rush.

Her palm glides up to his nape, as her opposite arm curls around his waist to grip on the waistband of his cargo pants. One of his thumbs strokes circles underneath the hem of her tank top and over her hip bone.

She hums low on his mouth, “I woulda loved that, babe.”

“Yeah?” He puckers, grazing her nose with the tip of his.

Pressing her teeth on her bottom lip, her chin jerks upwards- when all of a sudden, her arms react instinctively, locking around his midsection tightly, as Shane presses his body against hers covering her head at the sound of an explosion on the far end of the neighborhood, obliterating one of the empty houses, fortunately.

It only lasts a few seconds, she's the first to look to her side to peek between Shane’s head and arm, still fixed and pinning her to the wall- to see fire rising and most of the group, startled, taking cover.

With both their hearing suddenly impaired momentarily by the ringing inside, he can’t hear her when she calls for him, he stays unmoved from his position, unable to unlock himself from shielding her.

“Babe.” She calls for him muffled before her mouth gapes, trying to clear the ringing.

She can only feel his breathing on the other side of her face, and his pulse racing through his body underneath her palms. 

“Walkers!” Someone shouts distantly, mixed with other screams and the roaring fire.

When the ringing on their ears starts to ebb, Shane shockingly pulls back slightly realizing that both of them are okay. His gaze quickly switches in shock from her eyes to the chaos forming as walkers start breaching the property from the only susceptible spot that someone must have broken open. The fire only seems to have animated them more to enter.

He misses a beat, must be a first, feels like his heart is about to explode out of his chest as he takes a moment to react before reaching for his weapon, as Olivia takes a hold of hers, they both stride without hesitation towards the uninvited guests. 

Forming a defensive position in the middle of the road, some join them into their fight, as the others lock themselves in the house.

One of the new women comes screaming around the corner of one of the houses- she’s been bit on the shoulder, falling to her knees in desperation, Patricia and Maggie run to aid her but as soon as they get to her so are a few walkers. Maggie quickly fights them off and tries to pull Patricia from their cold hands but she ends up tackled by five of them.

Maggie retrieves with tears pouring out her eyes, training her gun up and stepping back with the rest of them, taking her time to shoot and take a couple of them down.

Their defensive line starts to weaken as more and more are crawling out of every nook, some of them get trapped in the fire but most of the horde keep coming at them relentlessly.

“Get everyone to the cars,” Shane shouts at Glenn and Maggie, taking a moment to reload, “we’ll hold them off.”

Aiming up, he keeps firing with Olivia, Rick, Carl, Daryl and Hershel by his side.

He silently snarls, eying Rick from the corner of his eye, knowing this is somehow his doing, and then locks eyes with Hershel and then Daryl, “cover them,” his head bobs back to the group leaving the house, and both of them step back from the line willingly to cover the rest.

Lori calls for Carl and Rick, as Rick, without looking back, speaks loudly ordering Carl to go with the rest.

Glenn and Maggie take everyone to the van and one of the cars, helping T-Dog get into it.

When Glenn goes to check the house Dale died on- he finds him roaming inside the room, growling and banging behind the door. With no time to bring him some peace, he quickly informs Rick and Shane that he has turned before getting into the van.

“Where’s Andrea?!” Olivia shouts realizing she hadn’t seen her since before this started.

None of them know where she is.

They retreat gradually, looking back to see them opening the gate, still clear from walkers.

Olivia takes the steering wheel on the SUV loaded with supplies and Shane climbs into the Hyundai with Rick taking the passenger seat.

Daryl leading the convoy, the drive off quickly.

Eying in the rear view mirror to observe Shane is turning the car around, she grabs the walkie-talkie.

“Shane, what are you doing?” her voice questions into the speaker.

“We saw one of the girls, uhh… Sarah, in the woods,” Rick responds, “we’re going back for her.”

“The gas station in Plainfields, we’ll wait there. Be careful.”

**

_...we’ll wait there. Be careful._

Her last words echo in his mind, as he remembers that last smile she drew before the explosion hit, wishing he would have kissed her one more time before leaving.

Taking that turn where Rick spotted the teen girl running to the woods with Randall behind her, that part of information he left out when he was talking to Olivia. Closing the distance as much as they can without getting too close, the car is parked by the tree line as the sun begins setting before their eyes.

Following the trail, they only find Randall brutally dragging the girl by the arm and rushing her to his truck, but Randall sees them and decides to let go of the girl as walkers get to her- her screams run through the trees piercing his chest like sharp needles.

Randall dashes quickly to his truck, with the two of them a little far behind. Shane goes raging as his feet start sprinting till the kid is on his hands to throw him bluntly to the ground.

Pointing at him, he plants his foot over the kid’s chest, “Where’s Andrea?” he snarls.

Randall shakes his head slowly, “who?”

“You know who!” he presses his sole harder on his sternum, leaving him gasping.

“Shane…” Rick calls grabbing his arm.

“This was your doin’ _Rick._ I know you let him go!” He angrily utters between teeth. “He dies.”

Elbowing Rick on the stomach to pushing him off him, he shoots Randall in the head without hesitation and turns to punch Rick fast and hard, drawing blood from his nose- as Rick tries to hit back, Shane’s weapon falls to the ground and his fist swings digging into the side of his Rick’s ribs, getting into a brawl, Rick manages get a couple of lucky hits, one on Shane’s lip and another on his cheek. Then he tries to get him into a headlock by Shane swiftly pushes Rick to fall on his ass.

Looking down at him, somehow he nervously laughs at his former partner, pacing back and forth, “Christ, Rick. How many places have you managed to screw yet? How many people have to die for you to realize that- that the way you’re goin’ ain’t right, man… and they know! Lori knows.”

Rick draws his gun, aiming up to Shane’s head. “Duck.”

Shane quickly moves, ducking his head and searching for his rifle as Rick fires at a walker approaching at his back.

With Rick on his feet now, they both turn their war to the horde.

Out of nowhere, Shane hears Andrea’s voice calling his name and he follows after it, towards the fire once more, when he looks back Rick is nowhere to be seen. He doesn’t care, he finds the less crowded wall and climbs it to call for Andrea but she doesn’t yell back.

Approaching, cautiously behind the houses, and on the opposite street of the fire, he quickly finds himself pinned down by walkers, when he tries to climb back to that same wall, he gets cut off. 

The only opening he finds leads him to a beat-up car. The one he finds himself now...

It feels longer but he’s been nearly four or five hours trapped in that vehicle, as horde refuses to step back for a minute for him to escape, even the flames still lit up before his eyes, he guesses they are more driven to the smell of human flesh rather than heat.

He dozes off for a minute before a siren blast makes him jolt in the seat, he sees a small glare of red and blue lights going off on one of the mirrors, seems far enough to draw the walkers away.

“Hey, asshole.” Olivia's voice comes through loud and clear through the walkie. “Are you there?”

Smiling, he watches the horde slowly following the sounds of a police car. “I’m here babe, how did you…”

“Figured, Rick said you took off running.”

“I thought I heard Andrea. Did you guys find her?”

“No, stay put. I’m coming for you.” She tells him.

“Where are you?”

Panting, “close, I left the cruiser in the middle of the field… I’m getting back to our car.”

“Thank you.”

“Yeah, no shit. Where did you end up?” Asks Olivia.

“Locked in a car by the...” he searches for the closest mailbox, “Powells.”

“Got it.” 

He doesn’t have to see her to note the irritation in her tone.

“I’m sorry.” He states into the device.

Next time she responds, he hears the door slam as she talks back, “are you gonna tell me what the hell were you thinking? Going back like that? And that stuff you said…? Christ, did you really think that was it? That I could leave without you?”

It only makes him smile how close her voice sounds, even in anger, he rather have that than anything at all.

“Are you gonna say something?” She urges on the walkie.

“I love you.”

“God, you’re such a jerk.”

When the place is almost cleared, she arrives to pick him up from his spot. 

“I’m really sorry.” He repeats getting into the passenger seat.

“I know.” Her mouth twists as she goes around the traffic island to get back into the road, “When I saw Rick coming back without you… I thought…”

“What did he say?”

“That… that you’ve lost it, that you killed Randall and beat him up.” And she takes a good look at him, to see his knuckles banged up, a few bruises on his cheek and a cut on his lip. “Shit, you two really got into it.”

“He had it comin’ Liv.”

“Not gonna argue about that, I almost killed him myself when he-” 

“Wait, where you goin’?” he wonders, eyes jumping between her and the road.

“Home.” 

“Babe, let’s think for a minute… we can’t just leave them stranded.”

“They're not stranded, they got half of our stuff and two cars, they’ll figure it out… not our problem anymore.”

“_Not our problem anymore?_ That’s cruel, you know that?”

“Please, talk about cruel… not one of them piped up to come get you…” She states in annoyance with unwavering leadfoot, eyes fixed on the way ahead. “Rick said it was about time to cut ties with you after- after that.” Hand waving vaguely over his injuries.

“Can’t you stop for a minute?”

Reluctantly, she slows down to pull up by the roadside, “a minute.”

Leaning forwards and spinning slightly on his seat to look at her, her head falls on the headrest and tilts staring back at him.

“I’m not staying, Shane.”

“Not asking you to… I’d never ask you to do that, but can you honestly tell me you’re okay leaving ‘em with Rick? ”

“Maybe not but we’ve done enough, babe, and it’s not that I don’t care...”

“I get that. You’re tired, I am too.” He admits, locking eyes with her.

“Then what is it? Why is it that you need to go back so desperately?” She huffs exhausted.

And she continues after clearing her throat, “I don't mean to be callous but they don’t care about you, Shane, I’m sorry. Last night we put our asses on the line for them without question. Today, more of the same… look around… This is it. Just you and me, if I’m not enough I’ll take you back-”

“Liv,” he interrupts her rambling, with a deep crease marked on his brow, “it’s not that, you’re everything. How can you think you’re not? But I wanna leave knowing that they’re okay, that we did all we could, that we gave them a chance to come with us… even if they didn’t come for me…”

She swallows, witness to his pride shrinking with every word, hand reaching to wipe with a thumb the tiniest of blood that comes out of his split lip when he speaks.

Shane winces taking her hand and lacing fingers with hers to place a kiss near her knuckles, “it’s not about them.”

“No? Are you trying to make up for something?” she squeezes on his hand.

“Maybe.”

“Okay.” She agrees squeezing on his hand before letting it go to start the car back up.

“Okay?”

“Sure, if you need to go back. Then we go back.”

Nodding, he turns on his seat as the drive back several miles away to the gas station she saw them last before going to Shane’s rescue.

“You sure they were here?” Shane paces by the glass doors of the convenience store, cautiously peeking inside, aiming with his flashlight into every corner.

“Yeah, they were definitely here.” And she points at a food wrapper on the pavement. 

“No signs of struggle, no tire marks on the road…” Shane investigates the place, “no walkers around.”

She climbs into the car leaving the door open.

“What?” He turns to her propping his forearm on the side.

“Nothing.” She shrugs defeated.

“You’re gonna say _I told you so._?”

“No.”

“No? What is it then?”

“It just makes me sad that this day has turned out to be this big of a disappointment, that’s all. You wanna go find the trail?”

He doesn’t even consider it, “No, you were right back there.”

Her hand extends to cup his jaw. “Let me clean that up, we could park in the back and rest for a couple hours.”

Leaning into her touch, letting out an exhausted sigh, “I’d like that.”

The place is quiet enough to do so, so they go around the store and she cleans up his wounds. After that they bundle together in the back seat, none of them really catching any sleep but resting their bodies before finally taking off in the morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if this is disappointing somehow. My main goal from the beginning was to take Shane away from the group but this won't be the last time that we see them though.


	17. Setback

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The second act on this thing is the filthiest F I L T H I've ever written. You've been warned. 
> 
> (They needed a break, okay? - don't look at me, I'm going into hiding after posting this.)

A day in half in the road, destination: Rocky Mount.

It’s a drive she’s done a few times in less than ten hours, past world-ending is not just as easy. 

The first two routes they’ve considered have been impossible to make. First, they were blocked by a jammed highway with cards, hundreds of them, they kinda saw that one coming but they wanted to check anyway.

Taking a different path, going as far as over half through South Carolina, the bridge they’re supposed to drive across was obliterated, forcing them to go almost halfway back to get back onto the next marked path on their map. 

So far the only stops they’ve made were once for sleeping, cautiously picking their places, looking for any signs of large groups of walkers or people before doing so. The other times they’ve stopped were to stock up for gas and food, only taking what they needed: from food to over the counter medication, with the usual candy craving for Olivia’s sweet tooth. The back roads are granting them that. Abandoned places that people have seemed to forget or are too scared to drive that far just for a few snacks.

Pulling up on a rest stop to have dinner before it gets dark, they fuel on ramen noodles. Olivia hums occasionally when taking a bite, Shane slurps almost without chewing, eye-siding her amused.

“Can’t believe this shit is your favorite food.” He spits out quipping.

“Never said it was my favorite, but it’s definitely a top tier.” 

Glancing at her. “What's your favorite food then?” 

“Hash browns.”

Head tilting with a raised brow, he chuckles, “hash browns, ain’t that right?”

"Hm-hm." Her mouth waters just thinking about them, “I could eat them all day.”

“I could eat you all day,” he teases, knee nudging on her leg.

“I walked right into that one,” her head shakes, “what’s your favorite food?

“Cheeseburger.”

With a scoff, “yeah, right! with that body? Uh-uh.”

Laughing and pointing comically at his torso with his fork, “all this… is post-world-ending-Shane, babe. I need to keep it tight to fight those things... and to _fight_ you on occasion, mostly you.”

Taking one of her last bites, she chuckles. 

“Then why aren’t you _fighting_ me lately? I’m not needy or anything but if there’s something in your mind, you know you can tell me, right?”

He nods, sipping from the canteen. “If there was something in my mind, I wouldn’t wanna scare you.”

“So there is.”

“Kinda.” He half-admits placing his plate down after finishing, worriedly collecting his thoughts. 

It’s true he’s been a little distant since they left. Not on purpose but unintentionally processing all that happened on the last day before they left.

“I love you, you know that.” His finger brushes her wrist, playing with the loose end on her green bracelet for a few seconds before placing his hand on her forearm to look at her.

“I love you too, babe. Whatever it is… I’m not gonna run.”

Dragging his other hand through his chin, he takes a deep breath.

“Been thinkin’ about what happened with Lori… how could have been a father and all. How different everything would be… it’s not like I wanted to happen, it was- it’s devastating finding the whole of it all at the same time. I’ve always-” he falters nervously, “even if that’s not the way I wanted to be, I woulda loved that baby, you know?”

Carefully listening, her heart shatters at his words. Her hand cautions with great care to move over his. 

“Of course you would, babe. It was part of you, you’re allowed to mourn too and be sad for leaving like that. I never wanted... If I ever made you feel like you couldn’t share that with me, I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s not that. There’s nothing to be sorry for… after, I started thinkin’ ‘bout us and how- if we ever decided to take that step, it has to be cause we both want to, babe. Not cause of us being careless,” his head tilts and rectifies, “me, not cause of me being careless, I don’t wanna do that to you.”

Her head hangs to rest over his shoulder, speechless. 

“I know it was too soon to tell you, I’m sorry,” he continues softly cradling her nape, “you don’t have to say anything.”

“No, you’re right, it is a little scary but I’m glad that you’ve told me.” She states low, tilting back to look at him, “And I want that too, anything moving forward it has to be the both of us.”

“So, we’re good?”

“We’re good.” She assures before pecking his lips.

**

Before it gets dark they check a few places for night sheltering. Driving quietly around an industrial zone, cautioning there’s no one around, they pick the building they deem safest and less crowded of them all: A wearhouse. There are three walkers trapped at the entrance, that they clear side by side. They have their routines now, and they’re pretty good by now at taking action by just looking at each other and watching their backs.

After taking hold of that entrance, they bust the lock open and sweep the two stories, taking another five that were inside, and they secure every entrance with their stock of chains and padlocks.

Sleeping in shifts, they’ve been switching every three hours or so the past few nights. While Shane stakes out the building, with a sharp eye on the outside, by one of the windows on the second floor, Olivia rests on the back of the SUV. They’ve folded down the rear seat, moving their supplies to stack on one side for them to stretch comfortably, or as much as they can given than Shane is really large and takes most of the space when they lay together, which is rare now that is only the two of them.

He doesn’t wake her up when his shift ends, when he lowered his body to place his back against the wall with his knees bent and shotgun in hand, dangerously, he succumbed to a small slumber for a little longer than he wanted to.

Fortunately, nothing happens during that time.

At dawn the mother of all summer storms hits. Wind sharply driving the mass of water back and forth, pelting on every surface and forming hail at some point. It wakes up Olivia, and for a moment she smiles at the smell of the rain and the sudden drop of temperature, until she remembers a storm like that would be pinning them down for a few hours.

Getting up, she finds him in one of the bathrooms shaving.

“‘Morning, handsome. You need help with that?” She offers, taking the sink next to him to brush her teeth.

“I’m almost done.” He tilts his head checking his jaw in the mirror and rinses the blade under the faucet before doing the last spot.

“You didn’t wake me up.” Olivia mumbles with the toothbrush circling inside her mouth.

“I dozed off up there.”

After washing his face, his hand circles around the small of her back, ducking to leave a small kiss and a greeting on her shoulder, "Mornin'." 

**

Deciding to stay there during the storm, while Shane takes his turn to sleep, Olivia steps outside to a platform in the back shielded by a metal awning, with her arms propped against the railing. If it wasn’t for the delay she’d be enjoying the storm, it always felt oddly soothing to her. 

Looking over her shoulder at the sound of the door rustling, Shane approaches linking arms around her waist, "hey, it's gettin' worse."

Sighing, she leans back against his chest, turning her head ever so slightly to face him, “at least we'll be rested. Did you sleep well? 

Capturing her lips in response, before sweetly confessing, “I've been dreamin' about you.”

“Yeah? Good dreams I hope.”

His words spelled right on her lips. “Only the best, Darlin'. I have something for you inside.” 

“What is it?”

“C’mon, you’ll see.” Grinning, he tugs a little on her waist.

Entering the big space and securing the door back into place, she strides in front of him to find the old big grey camping tent Shane has set up next to the car. 

Turning her body around, her jaw slightly opens in a smile, “why’d you do this?”

“Figure we could use a lil’ break with the storm and all, we have time.” With one foot inside, he takes his hand, clearly excited for it as his teeth bite on his lower lip.

“What are you up to, Walsh?” Her brow raises following him.

Inside the nylon walls, he has created a makeshift bed with all the cushiony stuff they have: a few blankets and pillows, as the edge of one of the sleeping bags is peeking, giving the thing away, under the thin sheet that is covering everything.

Amazed but not surprised he’d do something like this, her head shakes, reaching up to circle her arms around his neck, “Shane, you really didn’t have to do this.” 

“I wanted to, seems like we’re stuck here for few hours and the place is safe-”

Her hand quickly moves to quiet his mouth to muffled his “What?”

“Shh- don’t say the ‘S’ word you’re gonna jinx it.” She whispers a bit comically before unclasping his mouth.

“Safe? That’s the word you’re worried about. Now, don’t go on tellin’ me you’re superstitious.”

“I’m not, but all places we’ve been so far have been destroyed. It’s either our bad luck or us callin’ for trouble thinking it was ‘S’ in the first place.”

His head shakes, smirking, “you amaze me everyday.”

“And I love _you_ for doing this. It’s lovely.” Her chin jerks around. “ What I said yesterday was cause I was worried, we don’t have to do anything.”

His hand returns the same movement to cover her lips and chin, “I want to, I need to, babe. There’s not one moment that I don’t want to be with you, you go it?”

She nods, humming on his palm with a smile. That palm that slides down to her neck to be replaced by his lips. Sealing her mouth for a few seconds before parting ajar to let his tongue meet with hers.

As her fingers run up and down his back, he reaches down to the hem of her tank top to pull it off her, with little separations here and there to discard pieces of clothes from both. While Olivia unclasps her bra, Shane quickly yanks his shirt off him. His hands never stay away for more than a second. They run through every inch of her exposed skin at his reach, landing on her rear, fingers slipping under the elastic of her panties to squeeze and release on her ass firmly. 

His mouth grows hungrier, and she sounds a pleasured hum on his mouth, pressing her bare chest against his body. Olivia sucks and releases harsly on his lower lip locking eyes with him, fingers racking on his chest as she lowers herself leaving a sweet trail of kisses from his neck down to his lower abdomen, till her knees touch the ground. Then she undoes his pants staring up him. He holds her face and breathes a curse at her darling, who starts pressing her mouth on his hardness as she pulls down his pants, and over the fabric of his boxers before sliding them down to pool with his pants.

Bare in front of her, her tongue juts out to trace from base to tip, curling her fingers around it as she takes a good taste at the tip.

Eyes never leaving her, he wets his lips as his fingers intertwine in her hair, brushing it back, as she deliciously applies more pressure on his cock that grows deeper inside her mouth.

“Baby, c’mere.” His hands move to frame her jaw pushing her mouth off him, as she smacks her lips with one last suction before releasing him.

Motioning her feet to stand, with her hand still attached to his erection, jerking softly, Shane brings her straight into his mouth, guiding her to the bundle of blankets behind her. Placing her back against the makeshift mattress, as he kneels between her parted legs, his hands roam her thighs to pull the panties off her. As soon as they’re off, his mouth is pressing slacked kisses from her entrance to her clit, tongue grazing those end nerves, and then he wraps his lips around it, suctioning wildly as he’s used to, and driving her back to arch as a hand lands on top of his head.

When her fingers rake on his scalp and she calls his name and he’s suddenly crawling on top of her, forearms leaned on each side of her head, nestling his hips between hers.

Then a hand glides down her body, pushing himself back to watch her fully, eyes piercing through her whole body, the passing on his fingertips awakens her all down to her core.

“You’re beautiful.”

Her teeth bare in a wide smile, trapping her bottom lip under, slightly self-aware for a moment, and completely in awe of how warmly he looks at her. 

When his palm reaches inside of her thigh, stare finding his own touch to grip and press with his thumb on those faint marks of a love bite he left a few days ago. Pressing circles right on them, elevating the pressure with every repetition, stirring a light moan out of her and a clearing of her throat. 

Her hips slant to meet his length, circling slightly to fit his cock between her lips. Her hands tightly pulling on his midsection to pull him flush against her, making him break the touch from her leg. Griding with her, he pants and softly grunts close to her mouth for several beats, before reaching back to his pants to get the due protection before fucking her.

Comfortably settling between her hips, bodies tied into a knot. Shane hooks arm under her knee, fingers gripping on her thigh, as he buries his face at the curve of her neck. Her opposite leg curls around his thigh, while her arms snake around him, with one soothing at his nape and the other holding above his shoulder blade that shifts and tightens up with every thrust. 

When he’s close to finish, he jerks wildly inside her, bringing her moans to be louder on his ear as her fingernails dig into his skin until they both come undone. Before his breathing evens out, he’s already on her mouth mumbling ‘I love you’ and claiming the air from her lungs in a passionate kiss.

Parting, he takes a good look at her face, beautifully smiling. He places a small kiss on the corner of her mouth and turns to lay on his back and get rid of the rubber.

Olivia takes a good gulp of air with a hand on her stomach and the other adjusting a pillow under her head.

“Gotta say, this is pretty comfortable, babe. I didn’t peg you for a nestler.”

“Yeah? I knew you’d like it.” He boasts rolling to his side, leaning on an elbow.

“Didn’t think I’d miss it, though.” She says contemplating the space.

“The tent?”

“Um-hum, this was my side. I used to watch you sleep from here.”

He chuckles pressing his lips on her shoulder, before pointing out, “and there’s where I first kissed you.”

“Yeah, I remember.” She turns to her side to snuggle with her back against his chest.

He licks his lips and pushes the hair strands off her ear to whisper, “did you think of me ‘fore we were together?”

“What do you mean?” her mouth quirks up a grin.

“You know what I mean.” He scoffs, “did you play with yourself thinking of me?

“You know I did.” She confesses. “Why are you even asking?”

“Cause I want you to tell me, babe. I wanna know what you like, it’s been a fun guessing game until now-”

“Yeah, like you could use any pointers, really, Shane?” She sarcastically quips. “You’re doing great, you don’t need to know what’s in here.” And she points to her temple.

“Oh, so it’s dirty.”

“Beyond filthy.” She states.

“Then I really wanna know.” He snuggles closer, arm snaking around her and lips pressing at the crook of her neck.

Her hand reaches back to scrape blindly behind his ear, “I can’t tell you, if I do I won’t be able to look at you anymore.”

His amusement and curiosity raise with every answer she gives. “Humor me, please. I promise I won’t ever talk about it or make fun of you, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“God, Shane. It’s so fucking dirty.” She laughs, “it stays here, got it?”

“Got it.” 

She clears her throat with a swallow, pinpointing her dirtiest thought she’d ever had when she masturbated thinking of him. “Okay, what do you wanna know?

“Where were you?”

“Here in the tent, well, the farm but here. You were on watch and I couldn’t sleep and everything smelled like you so when I started, your face popped up in my head and next thing… you were handcuffing me to your cot.”

“Yeah?” he utters mischievously, not with a laugh but completely aroused than anything of her confiding in him, as his hand slides between her thighs, “Is that something that would get you off?”

“Maybe.” Her leg part slightly to give him some room.

“Then what happened?” And his hand begins grazing, barely, on her slit with the side of the index finger.

“You ripped off my clothes, put me on my knees and…”

He keeps teasing, upping the pressure until he’s fully focused on her clit. 

“And?”

“And you shove my panties in my mouth and told me to be quiet.”

“Did you like that?”

“Um-hum.” She moans on her throat.

“Fuck, you’re gettin’ me so hard.” And he presses his cock against her ass. “You like doin’ that, don’t you?”

With a small laugh, she responds by rolling her hips back to press on him harder, and he gets all driven to start rubbing intensely on her nub, with her hand grasping on his forearm.

Hissing on her ear. “Did I fuck you hard?”

“So hard.” Her voice cries out in a gasp.

“What else did I do? Tell me.” He urges curling closer to her, pushing her leg up to the side, sliding those fingers deeper down to her entrance.

Barely holding on, Her words falter, “you- you spanked me every time I screamed.”

Picturing the whole scenario she’s laid for him, his length twitches against the curve of her ass. “You're gonna make me come, Darlin’.” 

“Yes, come for me.” Her grip is tighter on his arm as two fingers go inside her.

“You’re soaked, babe.” He groans, almost leaking himself as well, while those fingers keenly tap on her g-spot. His tongue sticks out to trace her neck before asking lewdly, “have you tasted yourself?

“Yes.” She gasps.

“Do it for me. I wanna see you.”

Almost painfully, she stops his hand and brings his fingers to her mouth, wrapping her lips around them, she moans over pleased as Shane slides in and out to the back of her throat.

Then he turns her face to ravish her mouth as those fingers resume their former task inside her.  
Her hand reaches back to jerk him off, as he releases her mouth to nip at her earlobe.

“Am I better than your fantasy?” Shane mumbles.

“Ooh, much better and bigger.” 

His muscles strain, steady finger-fucking her pussy, not stopping until his hand is fully covered in her juices and her body is trembling against his, as he heavily unloads all over her ass.

Relaxing after, they hydrate with some blue energy drink they grabbed the day before.

“I love that you told me that.”

“Yeah? Wasn’t a little… nasty?”

“Not at all, babe. Well, kinda, but good kind of nasty.” Laying on his back, she curls against his side, placing her head on his chest. 

“Did you think of me like that when you were by yourself?”

“Not as detailed but yeah, of course I thought of you.” He chuckles pressing a kiss on her hair.

“Ok, now you have to tell me.”

“Just the usual. I’m a simple guy, babe.” He shrugs, smirking.

“Shane Walsh a simple guy? Not a chance. C’mon, tell me.”

“I thought of watchin’ you, you know? Do yourself. And- you’re probably gonna smack me for this,” his face tilts amused. “I- I wanted to cum all over you, your boobs, your mouth, that beautiful ass of yours … that’s all I ever thought about.”

She just laughs, “I guess you’re right, that’s pretty simple compared to mine.”

“But shit, when we got together, I just wanted to love you like this, I promise.” He adds kindly caressing her arm. 

“Same, babe.”

“I lost my handcuffs somewhere in the quarry but I’m down if you ever wanna play out that fantasy of yours.”

“Of course you are.” Olivia scoffs pinching on his other side. “I’m regretting tellin’ you already.”

“Please, don’t. I came even harder hearing you talk like that.”

“Yeah, my ass is still sticky.”

“Hey, you told me to do so.”

And they break into laughter before going for a third round. This time, Olivia climbs on top of him to lazily make love until they’re both spent for the afternoon.

It's close to the evening when the rain finally stops but they stay in their little nest for a second night. 

**

Early in the morning, they go on packing everything up before parting.

Shane is doing a final check around, making sure they're not leaving anything behind as Olivia removes all their security measures they had placed on all entries.

She immediately stops at the sound of a big truck rolling outside and Shane promptly gets his weapon to peak on one of the windows to see a SWAT armored vehicle slowly approaching the building. He gestures to lock it back as it was and they both stay low with their weapons ready as the rig pulls up by the loading dock.

Listening closely, they only hear two people talking, a man and a woman as they try to pry open one of the doors.

“Shit!” She whispers.

Shane aims at the door. “If anything…”

“I know.” She nods. “It’s us of them.”

Those two go around the building to the next one, and they follow from the inside changing positions to the next door.

“Get the bolt cutters.” The woman’s voice says shaking the chain.

“Damn it,” Olivia says soundlessly with a quick head shake before speaking up. “It’s occupied!”

“What the?” Shane mouths, eyes shoot wide open staring at her.

“We’re just looking for supplies.” The woman says from outside.

“There’s nothing in here.” Shane shouts menacing.

When the man comes back with the bolt cutters, Olivia takes another turn to stop them from rendering her chain useless, “Don’t! We were about to leave. Go back to your vehicle and wait for us to be out, okay? We don’t want any trouble.”

“Olivia?” The man from the outside questions. “Is that you?”

Takes her a moment to recognize the voice with so little words and a heavy door in between.

“You know this fool?” Shane wonders furrowing.

Her eyes roll, holstering her weapon to unlock the barrier between them to find her ex-boyfriend Holden and a woman, who’s carrying a camcorder in one hand with her other propped on the weapon attached to her belt.

“What the hell are you doin’ here, Holden?”

“Olivia Emmerson Brennan, as I live and breathe.” The man beams too friendly for Shane’s liking.

“Emmerson?” Shane huffs glancing at her, hand loosening the grip on his gun to place it inside his holster and offer his hand to both strangers.

“Hey, I’m Anna.” The videographer introduces herself.

“Shane.” 

Unlike Olivia, who is still astonished watching her old world collide with the new one. Not truly believing she’s seeing her ex after almost a year and a half, if she’s counting right.

“We’re looking for propane.” Anna tells them.

“There’s nothing in here.” Shane’s chin tilts, eyes darting inside.

“Well, place is all yours.” Olivia states resuming her original task of retrieving the locks.

Anna makes her way inside, turning on her video camera and pointing around the place. 

“You’re going home, are you?” Holden follows Olivia inside. Stating in all seriousness, like he always did. “You wouldn’t be here otherwise.”

Sighing, she turns to him, sighing, “yes, Holden. I’m going home.”

“I thought about you a while ago. If someone were to survive this, I was betting on you to be around.” 

Unfastening the last lock, her brow raises, eye-siding him, “I didn’t think much of you to be honest.”

With no intention to be disrespectful, everything coming out of her mouth is meaner than she wants to. She tries to shake it out, it’s not like she has feelings for him but in her head, she can only see the harsh and out of the blue way he broke up with her.

“Where were you when it happened?” Olivia asks.

“Washington. I was sent there as soon as it happened, got the whole wave of it and barely got out in time, then I met Ann. She’s a journalist too.” His head tilts looking at his partner, “We’re stocking up and going all over the country. We could use someone like you.”

“Like a trip? Is that what’s in your mind?” She ponders.

“No, we’re collecting stories, looking for survivors and documenting everything.”

“Same old, same old.” Her head shakes, “sorry, I’m already on a mission.”

“Always bothered you, didn’t it?”

“What?”

“What I did.” He counters. “It was important then and it is now.”

“Never bothered me Holden, not until you became this- this narcissist asshole that couldn’t see beyond his wall of awards. Is that what you’re doing now? You think people are gonna remember your name after this?”

“Well, it’s better than you’re doing. Chasing after your family? After all you’ve seen... you think they’re sitting around sipping tea and waiting for you?”

Her eyes roll, entertaining the idea of punching his face for a second before going back to the car.

“There are people looking for you, you know?” Close to a threat, his tone changes.

“What people?” and she stops to turn around.

“People who were freed from the decimation at Fort Benning. It was you, am I right? The one who lit the match? Some of them got as far as Virginia and they’re really thankful. Some others… not so much. We heard some interesting stories.”

Shane, who was organizing thoroughly their belongings in the trunk and half snooping on their conversation, stops all at once to grab his handgun and aim promptly at Holden’s head.

“Step back, Liv. Get the rope.” And looks at the other woman meandering around, “and you, get away from there.”

“Shane,” Olivia stares at him confused.

“There’s a price on you, that’s what he’s sayin’.” He snarls, steady hands and sharp eyes on both strangers.

“Look at him, putting two and two. Gotta hand it to you, I didn't think that hard head of yours was too bright when I first saw you.” Holden puts his hands up as Anne takes a place next to him.

“Go to hell, man. You’d really do that, huh? You’re gonna radio some assholes to come take her?”

“I really wasn’t. I was just telling her to watch her back. She should.” Holden smugly nods.

Olivia hands Shane the rope and occupies his position pointing at the two of them while he ties them up. First, tossing their weapons and that video camera aside and roughly binding Holden first.

“Is it true? What you said? Are people really looking for me?” She questions as Shane pushes him to his knees after securing his hands to knot with his ankles.

“Some of them, yeah.” Holden states before asking Shane, “man, is that really necessary?”

“You bet your ass it is.” Shane grits.

“I wasn’t lying, I’m not gonna turn you in. Despite what you think of me, I wouldn't do that to you.” He directs at Olivia.

“What about her?”

“I’m not gonna either.” Anne speaks up to vouch for Holden, “it’s true what he said. We’re collecting stories but on occasion, we search for people or things and we barter.”

“So, you two are what? bounty hunters?” Olivia wonders. 

“We dabble... for survival.”

“God, why is everyone such a prick now?” She huffs. “So, what’s my price?” 

“I don’t think there is one yet, but if I had to guess… you’d be high on the ammo and gas shelf. That’s where the money is now.”

With both tightly secured, Olivia and Shane collect their stuff from the floor and step away to have a sidebar by the entrance to decide what to do with them.

“They know where we’re goin’, Liv. I’m not tellin’ you they have to die, it’s up to you, but we’ll have a target in our backs as soon as we leave.”

“I do. I have the target, babe. Not you. And I already had it, we just didn’t know.”

“What do you wanna do?”

“I can’t kill him, Shane. And I wouldn’t ask you to do it either. I don’t love him if you’re wondering but I can’t just _kill him_”

“I know you don’t.” His mouth quirks up, “but we gotta do something.”

“He was always true to his word,” she glances at her ex, “never lied to me.”

“You think he’s tellin’ the truth now?”

“Probably not. The way he spit that out- that I should watch my back. I didn’t like that one bit.” Her mouth quietly snarls.

“Ok, let’s say we go right now. We keep on goin’, smart- like these past few days and we should be fine, right?” He reassures, not truly believing his own words, but he’s trying to do right for her. It is her decision after all.

“We’re never going to be fine, Shane. Something is always up, we’ll just have to add this to our list. If we leave them here, they’re gonna free themselves at some point.”

“So, we prepare for it and face it then.”

Agreeing on what to do next, they bring their armored vehicle inside to hide from plain sight and rummage through their belongings, taking the tapes hidden in a trunk.

“Hey! You can’t do that! We need those tapes.”

“This isn’t right, man. We’re telling the truth.”

“You sure you don’t wanna switch the SUV for this?” Shane knocks on the side of the rig ignoring their pleads.

“Nah, draws too much attention.”

Turning their backs, they climb into their own vehicle shutting the door to the warehouse before driving away.

If someone is purposely after them, it’ll be tomorrow’s problem.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so initially Anna was going to be Al from ‘Fear The Walking Dead’ but as I was writing I got the bounty hunters idea and I couldn’t turn Al into that, so I changed the name to some rando but I kept the SWAT rig and the part of going around collecting people’s stories.


	18. Homesick

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continues right after the events at the warehouse.

As a measure of precaution they’ve switched cars before crossing to North Carolina. Choosing a Jeep Wrangler from the parking lot of a mini-mall they’ve passed by to ditch the SUV, staging it up with a couple walkers inside, busting a few windows and defacing the bodywork like real pros in the run, like they are. If someone were to find that vehicle, no one would be the wiser.

“I just don’t see it, babe,” he scoffs, filling the tank of the jeep using a jerry can. “You and that- that douche?”

“He wasn’t a douche when I met him.” Olivia counters and finishes changing clothes, trading her fatigues for jeans and hiding the uniform with the rest of her military equipment per Shane’s suggestion.

She ties her hair on a ponytail, head swiveling, doing a final sweep for anything she might have forgotten to hide. “Ok, I think I’m good now.”

Shane leaves the jerrycan in the trunk and scans Olivia head to toe, reaching to pull the dog tags off her and over her head. “Now your bracelet.”

“Nobody has seen this but you.”

“It has your name on it.” He points out.

“They’re tiny beads, who’s gonna read them?” She counters.

“Your funeral.” He quips, head tilting before ducking to give her a quick kiss.

“You want me to go full Sydney and dye my hair bright red too?” 

“Who’s Sydney?”

“Umm, only the best character ever... from Alias? The TV show?”

“Yeah, I mighta seen a couple. Kickass chick, double agent shit?” He closes the trunk and goes around to climb into the driver’s seat.

“That’s the one.” She grins before getting into the other side. “You know… they know what you look like, maybe I should get rid of you too.”

“Yeah?” He chuckles propping an elbow on the wheel while his other hand pats and squeezes her thigh, as his face gets closer to hers, “I’d love to see you try.”

Smiling on his lips, fingers raking on his jaw, she steals a kiss.

“Are we leaving or what?” She mumbles on the corner of his mouth where she leaves another peck.

“Or what.” Shane smirks looking down for a second, as her lips print a third one on his forehead.

He grabs the 22 hanging around his neck to take it off him and place it on hers, chain circling on her skin as he secures the claps on the back.

“I want you to have it.” 

“Babe,” her brow narrows, touched by his gesture, “that’s yours, you don’t have to…”

He straightens it up on her chest to see how good it looks on her. “I know it’s stupid but I want you to have something of mine.”

Her hand soothes on his forearm, “it’s not stupid, I just know how personal it is- and I don’t want you to miss it.”

“I won’t. I have it right here with you,” his palm spreads to cover it against her sternum, “I wish I could give you something better…”

Her head jerks once, fighting the urge of bursting into tears, “I have everything I need… and I don’t have anything for you.”

“That’s alright, I just wanted you to have it.”

**

Even after dealing with the unexpected situation in the warehouse, today is the day they make it. They’ve already crossed state lines, the weather is on their side, the road seems to be too. They have to drive around a small group of dead ones, but everything goes well, or as well as nowadays is considered.

Closing the distance in merely hours, she goes quieter, and three miles from their destination it suddenly hits her how real it gets and how close to find answers to what happened to her family. Rationally, she knows they’re not sitting around waiting for her but deep down is all she hopes.

At sunset, she gives directions out of memory to Shane through the abandoned city, leading him to a suburban area where her family home still stands, in shambles but it’s still there. Pulling up right in the driveway of a two story home, the doors are opened and the few walkers spread around notice the car immediately. She’s stuck on her seat, as Shane quickly takes down a couple. And reach up to another lagging behind before it gets to them.

When she reacts is to aid him with those walkers and take down another one banging on her side of the door. Reluctantly, her eyes stare for a little longer at those she just took down, asserting it’s nobody she knows.

Building up the courage, she climbs the steps to the porch and carefully scans the first floor for walkers. With Shane behind, he stealthy takes the staircase to the second and sweeps it to be free of any roamers.

The place seems to have been shaken a few times, there are pieces of furniture missing, broken glass, darkened blood in the floorboards and trash accumulating in corners.

In the living room, Olivia sweeps a hand over the dusty mantle. Her eyes have formed tears dripping down her cheeks as her face turns to Shane. “I’ve never been homesick, you know? I know they weren’t going to be here waiting but still...”

His heart clenches so hard it almost brings him to break with her as he swallows. “Did they take anything?”

“It doesn’t feel like a home now. It sure doesn’t smell like it.” She continues before clearing her throat. “My dad had pictures here.'' Her mouth tiredly draws a smile, pointing at the end of the mantle, “his favorite was here.”

“What was it?”

“Us as kids. My grandma wanted a professional picture taken so we drove to this place, but my dad told us to make a face… and we were all looking silly. I was probably 7 or 8 and my front teeth were hollow,” she laughs soundless for a beat, “...and I was sticking my tongue out in between. Jesse was frowning so hard his cheeks were all red and Max was full yawning, eyes closed and picking his nose.”

“What about your mom?”

“What about her?”

“You’ve never talked about her.”

Her head leans, wiping part of her face, “never met her- well, I did. She took off when I was a baby.”

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”

“It’s okay, I don’t really remember her.” She brushes off, going around a smashed coffee table to get a hug from him.

Shane plants a kiss on her head, “we should look around, if they took the pictures, maybe they left something for you.”

Pulling back, they go slow through every room. Most of their clothes are gone too and when Olivia gets to her father’s office, she checks the locked cabinet that is busted now, to notice his hunting weapon is missing.

Taking a short breath after every room, Shane gets first to what used to be her room. To find a wall covered with beautiful watercolor drawings and art supplies tossed around. His eye is drawn to a corkboard with a few photos from when she was younger. He unpins a photo of her with another girl, both funnily snarling with a twist of licorice each between teeth, the other girl’s red and Olivia’s black.

“That’s Tara,” Her lips quirk up a smile.

“Best friend?”

“Yeah.” She nods, eyes darting all over the art on the wall.

“I didn’t know you were an artist.”

“Those are Enid’s, this is her room now.” She refers to her 10 year old niece, who spent most weekends here, or she did.

“These yours?” He points to an arrangement of a gold and two silver medals she got from swimming hanging next to the corkboard.

“Um-huh.” Sitting on the edge of the messed up bed, she lets her body fall back.

He looks outside the window and down at the backyard spotting a rotter entering the space. “We have a guest, you good here?”

“Yeah.” She sighs.

As Shane goes downstairs, Olivia’s eye catches one of the new drawings on the wall. An Olive Oyl portrait that makes her chuckle before catching a glimpse of something hidden behind it. She unsticks the paper to get a blue flyer of the apartment complex that his dad was working on previously. She goes through the info on in, pictures, location, available units… when she flips it, she finds something written on the back: JSS. His brother’s personal motto that he passed onto her. 

There is no further note, she doesn’t need one. That hint was only meant for her, cleverly hidden behind that paper of a nickname her older brother gave him at some point. 

When she climbs downstairs to tell Shane, her first thought at the sight of the terrifying look plastered all over his face it’s that he’s been bitten, aside from the blood splatter all over his arm and shirt, his eyes are welling up, body’s blocking the kitchen door to the backyard, he huffs propping his shotgun on the wall and dragging a hand over his chin, evading her stare.

“Shane? Are you alright?” her brow furrows slowly approaching.

“Babe.” He gives a small sob looking down. “I- I saw- I have to tell you something.”

“Are you bitten?” She closes the distance, checking the exposed skin on his arms and neck

“No.” He slowly grabs her face before pulling her close, heartbroken, his lips press softly on her hair before mumbling, “I’m so sorry, Liv.”

Her arms circle around him as she feels his breath catching on her ear. 

“I love you so much, Liv. I want you to know that.”

“You’re scaring me, babe. What is it?”

His hold gets tighter around her and his hand soothes at her nape to tell her, “there’s a grave on the back, has your dad’s name on it.”

She pushes him off her at once, with her palm holding mid-air, “you’re making that up.”

Beyond all logic, in her mind it is easier to believe that he’s joking than to accept what she deep down knew already.

“I’m so sorry, babe.” He tries to get a grip of her arms one more time.

“No.” She swallows, taking a step back, “he can’t be…”

And then she breaks into tears as all the air leaves at once to plead softly, “tell me it isn’t true. Please.”

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” He keeps repeating, tears spilling out of him too.

“No, I- I found them… they left to…” She expresses inconsistently, and she has to see for herself as her feet start rushing towards the back door.

Grief taking over, she falls to her knees on a patch of moved land with a wooden board stuck to the dirt with her father’s name on it: Owen Brennan. With no strength left to keep her eyes open, she silently sobs covering her face with both hands, wishing it was all a nightmare.

He walks to stand by her side, wanting to get down, pull her close and keep her from hurting, but he's focused on letting her grieve without those things coming to interrupt her. He knows how hard it is, he never met his father but he surely remembers how hard losing his mom was. There’s no words to it. Even if you expect it in times like this, he was hopeful for her. He wanted to give her more than a necklace, this was supposed to be it.

Her body painfully bows forwards, mumbling a breathless lament on her palm as he crouches down next to her, soothing a hand on her back.

“Babe, someone brought him here to rest in his own home. Whoever did it, maybe they’re still out there.”

“I know.” She sniffles uncovering her mouth to express with difficulty. “I found something in my room…I think I know where they are or were...”

“You wanna go check it out?”

Nodding, with her stare down, “I need a minute.”

He kisses her head and gives her some space to say goodbye.

Before going back to the car, she takes that flyer, those few pictures she had and a couple of her niece’s drawings.

It’s mostly dark now. The place isn’t far, just a bit over three miles into Nash County. The roads have been thoroughly cleared from any obstruction as they arrive to a compound surrounded by a tall half-brick half-metal wall, aided by a hardcore row of large pointy spikes, some wooden and other scrap metal with a few roamers stuck on them.

They drive around slowly, following the wall on a safe distance, watching if there’s even an entrance on this semblance of a fortress. Before they can find it, a small flood light points at them from above as a group of men, heavily armed, rush out of nowhere to flank them on both sides, forcing them to pull over.

“Fuck.”

“Out of the car, hands up, both of you!” One of them shouts.

“If you wanna back down now…” her head tilts.

“Shit, we’ve come this far.” He grips tightly on the steering wheel, eyeing and counting all the men around, ready to drive over them, “ask for your brothers and be ready.”

She nods and carefully reaches to roll down her window. Staring at the man pointing at her with a handgun, she smiles friendly. “Evening. I’m looking for my brothers, is there any way to find out if...”

“What are their names?”

“Max and Jesse.”

“Shit, Brennan?” The man exclaims surprised, pointing his gun down to the floor.

“That’s right. Are they here?” 

The man doesn’t respond, he just takes a few steps back grabbing his walkie to call for another man to get Max to get to the gate.

Her hand sweats on Shane’s tight grip on hers, as she swallows, watching one of the men sliding a concealed gate to the side just enough for a couple of people to get out.

She pulls the handle on her side and steps mindfully on the men flanking them to see her brother Max that quickly recognizes her as he races to meet her in a hug.

Before the eyes of those who smile at the moment and Shane that breathes relieved of getting something good out of this terrible day for her.

“Hey, sis.” Max greets her between tears as her face weeps on his shirt. “I knew you’d come back.”

“I went to the house.” She sobs.

“I know. I’m sorry you had to find out like that.”

“Where’s Jesse?”

“He’s not here, but he’s okay, he’ll be back in a few days. Julia and Enid are here too… I’ll tell you everything-” he pulls back, grabbing her shoulders, “let’s get you in first.”

Wiping her tears she meets another familiar face, her best friend Tara, that was patiently waiting for her turn to hug her. She throws her arms around her neck and they both sway for a moment, crying and laughing at the same time. 

Shane drives the car inside and when they are all behind the gate one of the guards apologizes to them. “Hey, I’m Miles. Sorry for before, man. We've had trouble recently and we’re not taking any chances.”

“That’s smart.” Shane utters, climbing out of the car.

“Hey,” Olivia extends her hand to take Shane’s, glancing at everybody, “this is Shane, he’s… mine.” She blurts out nervously, she sure hasn't used the word boyfriend in a while, and it doesn’t come out easily now. 

Max snorts a chuckle and introduces the rest of the guards spitting out names that he’ll have to repeat at some point .

“Dude, you’re in big trouble now.” Tara stands next to Shane, holding her hand up in a fist mid-air.

“How’s so?” He beams, fist-bumping on her knuckles.

“She claimed me as her best friend when we were 9 and I haven’t been able to get rid of her since.” She quips with a small grin.

**

A lot of things go over their heads as they walk through a street lit by a couple of flood lights, dimmed really low as they make out the small cluster of three buildings forming an U, unbound, to an empty square. 

Their first stop is the infirmary, set up on the first floor of one of the buildings, where they draw blood from both of them. Informing them that is customary to everyone that enters. They have a small medical team but right now there is just one doctor on call for the night who starts a preliminary record for both of them, asking a few questions about medical conditions and if they need anything treated right away.

“What happened to your arm?” Tara directs at Olivia, pointing at her bandage.

“Long story.”

As they keep walking, Shane keenly observes the new neighborhood, “how many people do you have here?”

“83… 85 with you two. You’re staying right?”

She glances at Shane, who responds, “we’re stayin’.”

“Good. I know that it’s a lot of information right now so I’m taking you to a temporary placement till we arrange an apartment for you. We’ll show you everything tomorrow. In daylight.” Max remarks. 

“Unless you wanna stay on my couch.” Tara quips.

“We’ve been sleeping in the car, so whatever you have is good for us.”

At the entrance of the second building Max points at the three guys taking their belongings out of the jeep. “They’re taking your bags in and we’ll keep the jeep in the garage. You can keep your handguns- no newcomers can carry but since you have an in with the boss, I can make an exception.”

“You're the boss now? Since when?” She huffs squinting funnily at him.

“As I was saying… the rest go to the armory for safety. Tara will walk you through all of it, she’s in charge of that.”

“How did you get this nice set-up here?” Shane asks.

“Dad. It was all his idea, something Olivia said that got him worried enough to- to know this situation wasn’t temporary..”

“What did I say?”

“Beats me… last time you talked with him, it changed him. You don’t remember?”

Her head shakes. “It was months ago.”

“Well, here we are.” Max walks them inside to the provisional apartment open to the kitchen area with a working fridge. There’s a table in the living room with three chairs and the rest is mostly bare with just the essentials, a couple beds, one in each room.

“You guys have power?” She’s seen it the whole time but it only registers now that they’re using lights, to a minimum, only the doctor’s office had the lights on.

“Yeah, we just got the solar panels to work a week ago. We’re still figuring out as you can see.” And he points at the kitchen.”You have some food there and if you need anything there’s a guard at the door, kay?”

“And I’m on the third floor.” Tara adds, “308, kay?”

After saying good night to being just the two of them, it feels a little unnatural to just relax and let other people take over. The place seems secured, sure, but they can’t just turn that switch off on their minds of being just still for a moment.

Shane is sitting on the edge of the bed untying his boots when her arms drape around his neck, he kisses her stomach and circles her waist with his arms, sighing quietely, face plastered against her shirt. She ducks, holding closely and planting a few kisses at the crown of his head.

“Thank you for coming with me. It was a long shot.”

“Not as long as if you’ve said we were going to Alaska, can you imagine?”

She tiredly smiles, pressing her mount on his hair, “I wish you would have met my dad.”

“Me too.” He looks at her, pulling slightly back, palms lazily falling to the side of her legs, “how're you holding up?”

Her shoulders tense going up down, moving her hands to rest on his neck, thumbs stroking back and forth on his skin. “I feel like I’m gonna throw up.”

“Are you, though?”

She huffs loudly, “No.” And moves to lay down on the mattress.

He finishes undressing the rest of the way and he opens the window before cuddling up with her.

“I didn’t know it was gonna hurt this much.” Her words drown in a tiny sob, followed by relentless tears. “All I ever imagined... it’s a hundred times that.”

“I know, sweetheart. I’m so sorry.”

Holding her firmly he places a kiss on her shoulder, fully aware of how a death like that can cripple you in imaginable ways. He lacks the words to make her feel better cause he never got them either, nobody can prepare you for something that, no matter how old you are. 

She falls asleep only a few minutes every hour or so, waking up suddenly having to adjust again to the new room they’re occupying.

Lacking air, she wakes up for good. It’s already bright outside and Shane has left at some point when she was out of it, as her heart races she has to sit to calm down, she places a hand on her heaving chest before hearing a faint knock on the door. 

On the third knock, she stands up and finds Tara at the door who comes in bringing a large thermos with coffee. She takes out the mugs from one of the cabinets to pour it as Olivia sits on the barstool at the kitchen island.

“I know it’s too early but I couldn’t sleep knowing that you were here.” Tara smiles warmly, sliding a mug to Olivia across the surface.

“It’s okay. I couldn’t sleep either.” She yawns covering her mouth before picking up her drink.

“I’m sorry about your dad. You know how bad he wanted to be here? He always knew you’ll find us.”

Her mouth twists and she blinks a few tears out, “how did it happen?”

"He… we were securing one of the walls when the biters came chasing a horse and one of them got him.”

“A horse?” She huffs, leaning on her elbows and resting her forehead on her palms.

“I'm sorry you didn't get to say goodbye.” Tara tells her sadly.

“Hey, where’s that boyfriend of yours?” Tara’s eyes dart around the apartment. “I brought enough coffee for both of you.”

“I have no idea. Probably testing your security.”

Just as she thought- Shane sneaked out before dawn to inspect the security of the compound, a fortress would be more an accurate way to describe this place. The security is tight, every building has a guard, and so do every wall on the outside, there are watch towers made out of scaffolding structures on each corner. 

In the middle of his inspection, he stumbles across Max who gladly shows him around, telling him that it’s pretty much a work in progress but they are starting to build a good system. He could never imagine a place like this would exist, but it’s real and they're here and he’s not surprised that this would come out of Olivia’s family, this is something she’d also do on her own if she had gotten the chance.

When he gets back to the apartment she’s already showered and drank the rest of the coffee as she fiddles with a book she found on the shelf trying to read but her mind doesn’t focus enough to do so.

Before lunch Max comes to fetch them out. He’s been giving them some space but his daughter and wife are dying to see Olivia. He takes them to his own apartment and Enid, who’s 11 now, boosts herself up into Olivia’s arms the second she’s at the door.

“You’re so big, little monkey.” She sounds an exaggerated funny noise at the back of her throat, “I missed you so much.”

Behind her daughter, Julia is crying waiting for her hug but she just joins Enid, curling up with the two of them, welcoming her sister. 

“We missed you too, Olive.” Julia chokes up, behind a smile and tears.

When they let her go, her arm extends to show Enid the bracelet she made for her.

“You have it!” The girl exclaims happily lifting her own wrist to show her aunt the same one she has in purple.

“Of course.”

Their apartment has the same layout as the others but it seems lived in. They have a few more furniture pieces and her eyes are drawn to the family photos that were missing from the house hanging on Max and Julia’s wall and show them to Shane.

The day only becomes more overwhelming as they learn, see and meet new people. Everyone contributes somehow, there’s a list of jobs that Julia handles, placing people when and where they are needed. Shane has been already leaning towards the security gig. That group is always in need of new people and to be honest he’d rather be in knowing what happens at all times than rely on others to do so, no matter how organized everything seems to be.

The community is vibrant with normal activity they haven’t seen in a while, like a bubble in time before anything happened. There's a construction going on on the west wall to add more space to the fortress. They have a little farm with animals and a garden with crops. In the grass there’s a small group practicing yoga. There are also training sessions for people not accustomed to weapons.

A few apartments have been repurposed as needed, half of a floor is dedicated only for medical, they have a staff that were rescued from one of the FEMA shelters. A couple others serve as classrooms for the few kids that are in the compound.

It’s a lot of information to process in just one day and after the tour and spending most of the day with her family, they return to the apartment trying to wrap their minds about all of it.

Coming out of the bathroom she catches him off guard in the middle of unbuttoning his shirt when her mouth is suddenly pressed against his, hands push the shirt off his shoulders just as he’s finishing undoing the last two buttons. Her lips, desperate for affection, come on hard and leave sloppy kisses all over his mouth before teasing with her tongue on his lower lip to slide inside him. Shane takes a beat to respond to the kiss. She’s guiding his step backwards, to land on the edge of the bed, pushing him down to sit as she straddles his lap, throwing her arms around his neck, with a palm cradling his head.

“Babe.” He mumbles between kisses, as the hand resting on her thigh squeezes lightly to get her attention. “Can you slow down for a second?”

She pulls back slightly, pressing her forehead on his. “Everything alright?” 

“It’s all good. Just wanna make sure everything's _good_ with you.” He utters low, “you’re going a little aggressive there.”

“You don’t like it?” She furrows a little disappointed, moving a hand to wipe her lips.

“I like it all right, babe, but I can see you hurting and it’s okay to slow down for a couple days and deal with-”

“I’m fine, Shane.” She brushes off, “I just wanna fuck, you good with that?"

He nods grabbing the back of her head and taking her where she left off. She hums in his mouth kissing him good, as he ups his game to match her intensity, hands slipping underneath at the back of her shirt to unclasp her bra, he caresses every inch of her skin to fill the need for comfort she’s seeking through such vehemence that rises with every touch.

Hips grinding down on him, she feels him bulging up over her panties. Parting only from his mouth to pull her shirt and bra off her, and then follows pushing his back against the mattress. She leans to drag her lips from his lower abdomen, peppering sloppy kisses and a few bites on his torso, to his collarbone where her tongue juts out to trace the curve of his neck.

Shane groans low, “God, Liv,” fingers dancing down her back to grab her ass and push his hardness upwards, as her hips roll roughly with him until she can’t take it anymore and reaches blindly to the side pocket of his cargo pants, where he keeps a couple of condoms, to grab one. 

Her teeth scrape and bite on his lower lip before parting to stand up quickly and push down her underwear to pool at end of the bed, as he undoes his pants, she crawls back on top and helps him pushing his pants and boxers just enough to expose his hard-on and dress it in a rubber.

Lining up with him, her hips bounce slowly, hands bracing on his chest while he takes a good hold on her waist. Building up to relieve the tension at her core, she moves faster and moans a little louder with a few curses as Shane groans every time she sinks on him. Her nails rake down his stomach straining and hollowing. It's fast and efficient and all she needs right now. When she gets close enough, she stops bouncing to roll over and over until she peaks.

Not being done with him, she bows to kiss him and then crawls back on his lap and removes the condom to replace it with her lips, he's already straining and nearly twitching when her mouth takes half his dick inside. While Shane lifts his head to watch her do it, he follows her movement with a hand on her hair, as she blows him hard with her fingers stroking at the base, having him quickly gasping for air and coating her tongue fully. 

“That mouth of yours, darlin’.” He huffs breathless. “Come back here.” And she drags her body on top of his while Shane frames her jaw with a hand pulling her into his mouth.

**

Just three days later, a few of them pitch in to help them move into a new apartment, granting them a few furniture pieces from the storage. They choose a new bed, a small red couch for the living room, a coffee table and a dining table with a few chairs.

It only becomes official when Tara comes around after settling in with a plant and a set of towels as a welcoming gift.

Her friend leaves a set of keys on the counter and smiles at both of them.

“Welcome to Lakeview.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Loosely inspired by other parts of TWD. I'm really enjoying going further away from canon and creating new places and stories. And if you're wondering, Tara and Enid are the same from TWD, except I made Enid younger.
> 
> I'm linking a list of characters, deaths and locations. I lose track of my own story all the time, so if you get lost too [here it is.](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ruCFmZnqA4waqhevIRXrTjL4JU1lg8VqS_zlw1Eo-WQ/edit?usp=sharing)
> 
> Thank you so much if you're still reading!


	19. Lakeview

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Small introduction to their new life and hints to future drama.

Lakeview is an apartment complex that was finished only weeks before the outbreak and was yet to be populated. Olivia’s father worked as a foreman during construction and took the chance on leading a group of survivors there after the FEMA shelter they were assigned to fell, as the rest of them. Owen Brennan soon became the leader by default, as soon as he started planning and bringing to fruition all his true vision of fortifying the complex to create a secure home for his family and the rest of the survivors. It was arduous work that didn’t go without losses but soon, as they started to go on runs and found more people, it became what it is now. 

Owen’s demise came during the first expansion to acquire more land, and his son, Max, took his place to carry the rest of his pans forward and make this place what he dreamed of: a safe community.

**

They never really talked about living together. When they were outside those walls it was more of a necessity, it was never questioned whether to split spaces, the only way to survive was sticking together. It becomes something completely different in their own little space when they don’t have to constantly watch their backs. With all the time in the world now, they fall into that routine easily and somehow it feels right, no matter how odd felt at the begging to adapt to what used to be considered ‘normal’- small things like locking doors, saying hi to a neighbor, have dinner at the same time everyday… are part of their daily life now.

After a few days of adjusting Shane learns that Olivia becomes a snug bug in the morning and puts off getting out of bed as much as possible. Sure, she’s still mourning and hardly sleeps at night, and probably grants her some leniency to get away with it, but he doesn't mind at all. With no imminent danger to look out for at every second, he could hold her for hours. Her body feels smaller than usual when she tucks herself tightly close to his chest as his arm circles around her.

Olivia finds out that he’s just as concerned with saving energy as much as her. They have only an hour at night after it gets dark to have the lights on for dinner or entertaining before bed. Consciously realizing they only need roughly 20 or 30 minutes tops. Both of them used to the dark they keep on using torches or lamps if possible.

At their new place of residency Shane lands the security gig fast due to his experience. Job isn’t played down to man the walls only, they also aid other groups that go outside the walls: runners, construction crew, cleaners...

They’re also responsible for keeping the peace among residents. There hasn’t been any major conflict since they got there. For what he’s heard, the big issue they had a few weeks ago was with a group that came together and soon started to cause problems, stealing food rations and not contributing in any way. Ultimately getting kicked out of the compound, only to come back one night to throw molotov cocktails over the walls and draw a herd of walkers to their gate. Hence the implementation of security since that incident.

The garage, acting as security headquarters, is quite large and underground with access to all three buildings, they have the armory, vehicles and room for storage. 

Sharply observing and absorbing everything, he manages to stay out of trouble, easy enough so far until getting a bad feeling about a certain group- a family group to be exact, two of the Prescott brothers, Ben and Kenny along with their mother, their partners and some friends. Shane can’t quite put his finger on it. It must be in his head or that relentless instinct that tells him not to trust anyone at first.

Time only proves him right as he starts noticing little things, they’re always there to question any of Tara’s decisions, who is the head of security. Figure it has to do more with her being a woman than anything else. Tara, while laid back, is incredibly smart and fair to everyone, and probably works harder than anybody else. Available at all times, only one walkie-call away for her to show up where she’s needed. Always willing to adjust schedules, teach the younger crew or cover someone’s watch. She was in the police academy before “the world went to the crapper”, as she told him herself, and recognizes that sense of duty, even if she wasn’t fully trained, she’s skilled and committed to the bone to do it right. He admires that, especially when she has to deal with those assholes on top of it.

He's made good friends there, not only with Tara and Miles, but he’s taken a kid who’s training for security, Noah, under his wing to teach him. One day he finds himself in the inner circle, being one of Max's confidants, which it’s great, not only his ideas get heard and accounted for but for him it is really important to have a good relationship with Olivia’s family. 

Contrary to popular belief, Shane’s never had a problem with authority or with someone leading him, it was Rick’s indecision and reckless actions that he had a real hard time with. Here, they’re quick to anticipate and come up fast with a solution to any hurdle on their way. And Max is a solid leader, he doesn’t often please everyone but he’s thorough and at the end of the day everyone is accounted for and has a good place to rest.

As the community grows the struggles to meet people’s demands rise as well and the Prescotts are not making that any easier. 

They’ve disclosed a bullet point version of everything they’ve been through since Olivia and Shane met in Georgia, keeping the most jarring details to themselves. Now they’re wondering if they should have kept the information regarding those bounty hunters to themselves, but no, it was the right decision cause keeping that secret would’ve only served to put everyone in blind danger. 

As soon as he started devising a plan with the rest of them to keep Olivia out of anyone’s radar, the Prescotts found their in and they’re using it blatantly to gain more power, more voice decision and well, more food, more free time and they’d add the freaking sun too their list if they could. Using the old excuse of her being treated differently for just being a damn Brennan.

It’s not like they can kick them out just complaining, not with real weighted reason, they’re still hard workers and it’d be real shitty if they were to be sent off with Kenny’s wife on her third trimester.

**

Olivia, on the other hand, takes more time processing everything and hasn’t figured out what to do permanently, not even if she wants to commit to security just yet. She goes where she’s needed, signing up for whatever bullshit chore of the day is to keep her mind occupied. Not ready at all to sit through a full shift to guard the walls alone with her thoughts. Knowing that eventually she’ll get pulled to it just as the rest cause they’re in need of more people.

So far she’s helped mostly on walker duty, organizing supplies, piping up a few times to do laundry. Having solar panels has helped setting a functional laundromat with washing machines to quicken the process. One of her favorite things was helping Julia one morning with the kids to paint a mural to welcome autumn. On one of the walls, they painted a big tree with children’s hand prints as leaves in oranges and red shades. Then, they all wrote their names next to the tree trunk, all in different colors.

The former soldier is back to running again. Usually at sunset, the morning doesn’t sound so appealing for a run after so many nights having trouble sleeping. She laps inside the compound for over half an hour. Memorizing every nook of that place and soon starts to get bored of it. One day, she decides to expand her horizon, stepping outside the gate and into the woods to explore some more with the hesitation of the man at the gate that warns her it’s not safe to go out alone. Everyone has been briefed on Olivia’s situation and the people looking for her but he cannot stop her or anyone from going outside on their own volition. Gun and knife tied to her belt she takes her chances striding her way to the lake that looks beautiful at this hour.

She’s anxious to reunite with her middle brother Jesse, still out on a run. She’s learned that he scouts on his own, searching for places to raid, and then he would go back with a team to get the goods. Sometimes he brings new people too.

After her run, she goes to the infirmary and gets those stitches removed from her upper arm, leaving to nasty cuts crumpling her skin, healed finally but not the best to look at. It still cramps up at times, especially when she lifts it over her head fast.

If not fully, they have quite the stock up of medicine. The supply team really came through, scoring big time by sweeping at least three pharmacies, which granted her to get back on the pill. Coming as a blessing since they were close to running out of protection themselves. Barely getting into the conversation after what happened with Lori, they’ve both agreed that, as for now, having children would be less than ideal. 

**

Shane’s set an alarm on his watch but wakes up before it goes off. He stays in bed and pretends to be asleep, hearing her quiet steps before sneaking into her side after going to the bathroom, and carefully lowering her body next to him. She occupies half his pillow, unable to stop herself from softly raking her fingers on the scalp behind his ear. He tries not to grin, keeping eyes shut but it tickles for a second when her tips brush lightly the shell of his ear and his lips pucker giving him away.

Closing the distance, her palm lands on his neck as her lips hush in a whisper, “your hair is getting longer.”

“Yeah, I’m like a chia pet.” He jokes a little hoarse, draping an arm around her, “and it’s only two weeks in.”

“It’s cute.” She tucks her arms against his chest, settling her palms on his collarbones.

“Yeah?” He nuzzles the tip of her nose with his.

“Very cute.” She says lovingly.

“Mornin’ snug bug.” His hand massages softly on the middle of her back.

She’s not very fond of that nickname, but loves the way he says it so she just beams a _morning_ back, over the moon of feeling so loved when she’s with him.

“Whatcha doin’ today?”

“Walker duty.”

“Walker duty,” he scoffs, “you know you’re gonna join me at some point... why are you being so stubborn?”

Her shoulder jerks, “I don’t know, babe. Does it bother you?”

“Not at all, darlin’. I just like _us_ being a team and all. Staking-out at night, when it’s all quiet and the sky is all clear and you can see all the stars. It was kinda romantic.”

“Yeah?” her brow raises, amused, “let’s see when it comes winter, how are you gonna like freezing your balls at night _watching the stars._”

His palm slides to her rear and over her panties. Tone shifting from sweet to coarse in seconds, “well, that’s why I have _you_ to keep ‘em warm, baby.” 

Quipping back, her head shakes, “you say the sweetest things to me, Shane Walsh.”

And instantly the beeping on his watch goes off and his arm extends to the nightstand to turn it off.

“I thought your shift was later.”

“It is but I’m taking the kid out for practice. You sure you don’t wanna come?”

With a tired sight, her forehead rests against his, “maybe another day.”

This is her favorite time of the day, just being close to him like that now that they can do it freely.

“I could get used to this.” She utters low and tender with a pleased pull on the corner of her lips. Thinking this is what she fought for, some sense of normality and peace that she hasn’t had in ages.

“Me too,” he breathes in a whisper, softly running a hand up and down her spine, heart so full it physically aches to leave her there, even if it’s just for a few hours.

**

After breakfast, they go on with their tasks for the day.

Shifts change every other week, this one in particular he’s tied to the afternoon and uses the morning to teach the kid, him being in his early twenties, but still a kid to him. Today, they drive to a shooting range about half an hour away from the compound to teach him how to use different weapons. Being mindful of the little amount of ammo they have for practice, he shows him all the mechanics first before moving on to shooting. Noah is a quick learner but it’s easy on still targets. So, he carefully finds a couple of walkers and draws them to a safe distance, and that’s when he gets a little nervous. Takes him a few deep breaths and several of those Shane’s annoying taunts to hit the moving marks before returning home.

Walker duty is always done in the morning and it consists in just cleaning the walkers that have reached the spikes around the perimeter. Depending on the number, it’s usually a task for no more than five or six people with one guard as aid, they got Miles and his dog today.

They end what is left of the rotters first and then proceed to pull them out of the traps. After that, they drive the bodies a couple miles away to a ditch that was dug a while ago where they burn all the decay. The burning part is only done once a week and takes the majority of the day to keep the fire from spreading until there’s nothing left but ashes.

Today was one of those days, it’s consuming, long and it mostly makes her hungry, the others come prepared bringing a little picnic. Used to the smell of it, they eat around the truck, with Rusty- Miles’ dog- as their watch for walkers. He’s a very clever one that can smell them a mile away. Alerting them by taking a stance on the direction and whining. In the afternoon, he rises up from his lying position and sniffs around towards the tree line. Turning his head back with his ears pointing out and whining low. And now she’s amusedly following the animal who points her exactly to a couple walkers coming their way on a trail in the woods. With Miles on her right, she takes the one on the left with her knife as Miles takes care of the other. Rusty keeps going, sensing a few more ahead.

“Good boy,” Miles scratches the dog’s ear before trailing along that direction.

They can hear the doomed growls before finding a bigger group, no more than 15, passing through a river. Trading knives for guns, they ready their weapons. Olivia takes down the first three, missing her shot at the fourth one. A few yards from her, Miles takes care of the other half. She levels her barrel, breathes and fires again, getting a clean head shot. Shifting on her feet to aim at the next one, she pulls the trigger but the clip jams and realizes the bullet has failure to feed at the chamber.

“Shit.” She tries to fix it and gets Miles’ attention, letting him know she’s having trouble with her firearm.

Nodding, he dashes to cover her, taking the last few of them out.

Frantically trying to fix the magazine, she fails noticing the shake of her hand when wrongfully releasing the clip to fall to the ground. As Miles’ gun keeps going off, her balance is compromised almost a second after a walker approaches out of her sight, close to tackling her down for a moment until anchoring her feet on the floor, keeping the thing with her good arm extended to his chest as she reaches with the other to grab her knife and jab it into its skull.

Faltering, she lowers down to sit with her back pressed on a tree’s truck to catch her breath, holding tight into her bent knees as Miles’ picks up the magazine that fell and strides towards her after finishing.

“Hey, are you okay?”

Olivia looks down, shutting her eyes with a light shake, as the heaviness settles on her chest. She recognizes too well already, this the third time she has let panic take over her.

He takes out a bottle of water from his backpack and offers it to her. “Here.” 

Unable to unclasp her hands from her legs, Rusty follows by sitting in front of her with his snout nuzzling at the back of her palm.

“It’s okay,” Miles soothes, leaving the bottle close to her and taking a good look around for walkers.

After a couple minutes, her eyes open and react to the animal’s hair tickling on her skin. Her fingers waver extending her hand to pet Rusty’s head.

When she can finally speak, she croaks a thanks before getting a swig of water.

“I’m sorry. I couldn’t-”

Miles gestures with his hand, writing her off, “don’t worry about it. Do you want me to radio Max? or Shane? Maybe Tara?”

“No, it’s fine- we have to finish here.” Her eyes go up to see the fire still burning and then to Miles who has blood dripping on his temple, pointing at it, “you have blood there.”

Miles brushes his fingers on the wound, “shit, a branch whipped me when I was…” he looks back at the trees, leaving the thought unfinished. “Are you sure you don’t want me to call ‘em?”

“Yeah. No, it’s fine. I- maybe it was too soon.”

“Has it happened before?” 

“Not the gun part.” Her head leans and takes another sip of water, feeling mostly embarrassed thinking about it. 

“He likes you.” Miles points at his dog, lovingly placing his head on her knee as she cards her fingers through his hair.

“He’s alright.” More than alright, makes her feel better having him there, it’s like he knows she needs that in that moment.

Miles turns around, suddenly training his gun up to Sookie and Gabriel, rushing to look for them.

“We thought something happened- are you hurt?” Sookie asks.

“No, we’re fine, we had a mishap taking that horde out, but we’re good.” Miles dismisses, “well be there in a sec.”

Back with the rest of the group, they watch the fire safely from afar until it burns out. Her body still trembles slightly as she sits down, propping her back on the wheels of the truck to hang with Rusty, who is clearly guarding and distracting her just enough, and keeping her mind from spiraling.

Somehow, she’s forgotten about the whole Prescott drama. It comes to mind quickly when noticing Sookie staring oddly at her, with a sour scowl mainly. She’s the girlfriend of one of them, not sure which brother at the moment. If she doesn’t feel guilty enough for putting her brother in an awkward position, as much as she tries to help, it all seems for naught before the eyes of these people. She’s done nothing to them and yet she’s once again scrutinized for something that goes beyond her control.

**

Coming back in the evening, she pulls through and keeps Miles some company in the infirmary while getting some stitches on the side of his head. She quietly requests him not to say anything about what happened. He’s a good guy and assures her the secret’s safe with him as she says goodbye to Rusty.

“Hey, are you hurt?” Tara asks, catching her at the door of the infirmary.

“No, I was just with Miles, he got some stitches but he's gonna be fine.”

“Good. Walk with me?”

Nodding, they stride to their building.

“Are you coming for dinner?” Olivia asks.

“Nope. I have a date.”

“Really? Do people still go on dates?”

Tara shrugs, smirking, “I don’t know about other people but I do.”

“Who’s the lucky lady?”

“Uhhh… Denise.”

“She seems sweet.”

“She is.” Tara affirms opening the door to get inside.

Parting on different floors, the first thing she does when getting inside the apartment is getting rid of her clothes that reek of smoke and death. Cancelling her run today, she hops into the shower instantly to wash all of it before dinner with her family. She likes going there when Shane’s on watch at that time, sometimes he comes too when he’s free. And other nights are just for them.

The incident made her a little nervous, but manages to keep it to herself during dinner. Unsure of reasons to hide it, as much as she trusts Max and Julia, she’s not used to sharing that part of her life with them. Knowing that she won’t be able to keep it from Shane even if she wanted to, which she doesn’t. It puts her at ease knowing that he’s there, that he has her back no matter what.

Putting off returning home, she stays for a while after dinner and reads a book with Enid, not really using her as an excuse, she loves those little moments with her. It’s somehow surreal the world doesn’t suck at that time, getting lost into an imaginary world eases all up. Both plopped down on the couch, when the lights go off, they switch a flashlight on and take turns reading out loud, one page each from The Hunger Games.

Enid has read it before and gets excited anticipating her favorite moments. Olivia gets really into the story when the games begin, while she reads, “All the general fear I’ve been feeling condenses into an immediate fear of this girl, this predator who might kill me in seconds. Adrenaline shoots through me…”

An hour passes quickly of them just reading and Julia calls time for bed for her daughter. Enid counters they’re in the middle of a chapter, and with a little help of Olivia they finish chapter 11 before turning in.

Knowing that Shane is still working, she climbs the two flights of stairs up to her apartment stopping at Tara’s door to share a beer and talk about their day.

“So... how was your date?” Olivia asks, tucking her knee close to her chest with her heel on the edge of the chair.

“Good.” Tara utters before sipping from her bottle.

“Good? You don’t seem too convinced.”

“No, no-” her head shakes, “it was great, she’s great. It was me… I was exhausted today and threw me off a little.”

“Tell me about it,” she sighs, frowning softly, feeling bad for her friend, “any chance for a second?”

“Yeah, we just have to figure it out. She’s really cracking those books right now too, wanting to help in the infirmary… which is great. I said _go for it_, you know?”

Olivia nods staring at her beer before throwing her bottle back.

“How did you and Shane start anyway? You’ve told me everything except that.” Tara asks.

Her head leans, with a raised brow, “you know _how_ we started.”

Tara chuckles for a beat, “wow, you didn’t waste any time, didn’t ya?”

Half-shrugging, she quips, “I mean, have you seen him?”

“He’s fine, I guess... if I was into dudes.” She downplays amused.

And they both break into giggles for a minute, before easing up into a soft smile, “yeah, it was kinda messy when we met… I didn’t really expect anything, and he just…” she goes speechless trying to convey how much she cares about him, “one day, there was no turning back.”

“Well, I for one am glad that at least you weren’t alone. And he’s got my vote. He’s always talking about you, and he’s funny and patient with the rookies. I saw him today cleaning used guns earlier and showing them how to do so and I gotta say... he's really good. I wish I had him in my class.”

“Yeah, he’s something else... I feel like I’m letting him down.” Olivia shares, troubled by her own insecurities. Actually, letting herself down more than anyone else. 

“Hey, you’ve been through a lot and I’m sure he understands.” Tara leans on the table, “you’re not letting him, me or anyone down, ok?”

“Okay.” She responds quietly. 

**

She must be either a little tipsy, losing her mind, not used to the habit of locking doors or all the above cause when she is finally back at her own apartment, the door is already unlocked but Shane isn't back yet and she could swear it was locked when she left earlier. Not that she doesn't trust people in there, but it’s nice to have some boundaries at last and a space that is just for them. She doesn't think much of it and everything seems to be in the right place. 

Shane returns only a few minutes after her when his shift is over at midnight. Leaving his boots at the door, he hears her still up with the faint light of the lamp on just as she was getting ready for bed, pushing the sheets slightly and straightening the pillows in place after.

“Hey,” she hushes, turning to look at him.

“Hey, baby. Still up?” And he pauses next to her to give her a quick kiss before discarding his clothes at the same time she slides underneath the covers.

“I went to Tara’s. I just got here.” She reclines on her side.

“Did you have fun?”

“Yeah, we just talked and had a couple beers.”

Laying next to her, he pulls the covers over both of them while her body settles with her back on him, at the same time his arm curls around her middle. His face sets close to hers with his chin’s scruff scraping at the crook of her neck.

“You’re cold.” Her palm brushes up and down his bicep.

“Yeah, it’s kinda chilly at night already.” 

“Told you.” She quips fast, making him laugh.

“I missed you.” He kisses and smells the warmness of her skin intensely, with a sigh so loud that gets her to grin to herself. 

“Missed you too, babe. Did you have a good day?”

Mumbling on her neck, “Uh-hmm, boring for the most part. You?” 

“No, I…” she pauses, contemplating a moment, “I’m okay now but something happened.”

He leans on an elbow, listening to her telling what she went through in the woods, as her head turns enough to find him, focusing mostly on his hand pressed flat on her stomach, as her fingers link with his, keeping her from breaking again. Feeling much lighter as the words come up, with no pulled punches or overstatements.

“I’ve been really tired lately…” she downplays for a second before rambling, “and I know there’s more to it but I can’t get into that now, if I go there I feel like I’m gonna drive myself crazy and I can’t afford that right now… and maybe I shouldn’t have gone out today.”

“I ain’t never gonna tell you what to do but there’s no shame of taking it easy for a beat, Liv. I’ll do your job, take more shifts if I have to, but I can’t have you out there when you’re feelin’ like that.”

She rolls to her back to fully look at him, “thing is I can’t stand being idle either.”

“I know,” he breathes, caressing the crook of her arm with his thumb, “you come to me if it happens again, ok?”

She swallows, “yeah.”

“I’m here for you and I’ll keep sayin’ it till you believe me.”

She smiles softly, “I believe you even if you don’t say it. I- I haven’t been the easiest to deal with lately and you’ve been nothing but sweet and understanding.”

Wavering for a couple of seconds, he dips to press sweetly his lips on her mouth that curves wider before puckering against his, with her palm moving to hold his face.

“I love you,” she utters lovingly, locking eyes with him.

“I love you too, babe.”

“I’m sorry, I’m keeping you up, you wanna go to sleep.”

“Don’t be,” he scoffs, hugging her tight and burning his face on her neck, with a leg tangled between hers, “I like this.”

“Me too.” Her arm settles around him with her palm resting at the back of his neck as she kisses his head. Staying like that for a while, just soothing each other and talking softly until falling asleep, Shane usually drifts off first, and after today it doesn’t take her long to follow him after that, but she still wakes up a couple times before morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I stole that "I'm like a chia pet" line from Jon Bernthal himself. And there was another one, when she said "I could get used to this", that was stolen from Olivia Dunham (Fringe). I often draw inspiration from her.
> 
> [Character list.](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ruCFmZnqA4waqhevIRXrTjL4JU1lg8VqS_zlw1Eo-WQ/edit?usp=sharing) I'll link it every time I update it.


	20. Delicate

Waking up first to the quietness of the early morning Shane's warm back is pressed against her arm as usual. Rolling to her side her legs shift noticing the mild arousal and tingle on her cunt when rubbing her thighs together. Her arm snakes around his middle, flattening her bare chest flush on his back, lips grazing at his nape. Consciously trying to stir him awake, her nails rake along the lines of his abs down to his boxers’ waistband to trace the edge or the elastic with her index. Shane wiggles as a small noise rumbles on his throat. Awakening gradually, his dick hardens as her palm rests on his lower abdomen, teasing close enough for him to rouse from slumber.

Olivia licks her lips reaching to nibble playfully at his earlobe, stirring a drowsy hum out of him as his body stretches a little more. He's already half grinning to himself.

“Wake up, babe, I wanna play.” She breathes subtly on his ear followed by a line of kisses at the curve of his neck. Her hand skims lower to feel his hardness over his underwear, as her fingers curl and motion, he grows a little bigger filling her fist. 

He groans low and pleased, reaching back to palm her thigh.

“You know… it’s been over a week already.” She tantalizes before showing her teeth to scrape on his skin.

(Over a week since she went back to the pill after getting a clean bill of health from Dr. Rosenberg and went a few extra days over the limit to be safe.)

Curling his brow, his face turns pushing her mouth away. “And you’re just tellin’ me know?” 

“Yeah, I forgot.” She leans on an elbow and pushes her side up a little to capture his mouth, not giving a damn about morning breath, her tongue juts out brushing his lips ever so slowly before sliding inside.

Shane rolls to his back without breaking as her body adjusts with him. His hands eagerly roam her flesh stopping to grip at the curve of her ass. The kiss intensifies as he comes fully awake on her mouth, and suddenly the hold at her hips tightens to push her body off him and have Liv against the mattress instead. Half crawling over her, his fingers tuck around her wrists and pins them on each side of her head. 

Her head moves upwards to kiss him but he pulls back, grinning.

“You’re not gonna kiss me?”

“I thought you wanted to play.” He licks his lips, keeping her in that position, and she tries again sticking her neck out a little further.

Getting the same reaction from him, she sights pursing her mouth. “Well, it's not fun if you don't kiss me. ”

“Oh, it is, darlin’.” Only to his enjoyment, he leans, grazing her lower lip with his words, “open your legs.”

Intrigued by his ways, she follows that last instruction as his leg pushes in between to press his thigh at her crux, causing her hips to slant and slide finding the best spot over his straining quads.

Knowing that is not enough for her, his voice is calm and hushed on her ear, after kissing her earlobe, “you wet already?

“You have no idea.” She sighs, angling herself for more friction.

Chuckling lightly, he takes a quick look between them and goes back to her ear, “how long can you keep that before you start beggin’ me?”

“I’m not gonna.” She hisses, pressing harder against him, mind set on not giving him the satisfaction of begging. It’s something she doesn’t do often but he’s definitely got her to do once or twice.

“But you are.” He mumbles nipping her neck as his knee moves up and over her panties to press on her clit. 

“Shane, go easy.” Her body squirms a little as her arms tense up under his hold, afraid of him pushing his weight down in that position. “Watch what you're doing, please.”

“Shhh, okay.” He pulls his head back and hovers, mindfully keeping himself steady and pressing softly on her pussy, “better?”

Olivia nods, “that wasn’t me begging, by the way. It’d hurt like a bitch just as you guys.”

Shane laughs, locking eyes with her, “hey, I’m not gonna argue with that.”

Her panties feel wet circling against his knee joint. She closes her eyes, while he scans her body beautifully straining- her hands have balled into fists, teeth baring on her lower lip with low moans hissing in between. He glances down to her breasts heaving and puckering at their peaks. Her legs tremble a little, parting at times and closing on him.

He removes his knee just as she was getting ready to explode and drapes it to straddle her lap.

The moan she lets out is utterly unsated. “You’re fuckin’ evil.” 

He brings her wrists over her head and crosses one over the other, changing his hold to one hand only as the other moves to cup her face, “I wanna tie you up so bad.”

With a shy shake of her head, her fingers wave caressing the back of his hand, “not today but I like it- _you_ holding me like that.”

“Good. Let me know if it’s too much, yeah?” He leans closer, framing her jaw and teasing her lips with the tip of his tongue, Olivia sticks out her own making him retrieve again.

“Christ, you’re really gonna make me work for it, huh?”

Shane hums in response, lifting his brow, his fingers wander down her chest, watching her react when they pinch her nipple, already hard rock. She shudders and buries a moan in her throat as his head bows to take care of the other boob. He teeths at the nipple while palming and playing with the other.

Olivia zones out, closing her eyes again and enjoying his caresses. It feels good having some time to get that kind of attention. Despite the little cramp flaring on her bad arm, she relaxes into his touch, and his lock- she’s been toying with the idea of him handcuffing her up for a while, but this feels just as good. It buzzes through her whole body. Her stomach hollows at the passing of his nails, raking roughly at times and gentle touches on the same spot with the plane of his palm. He skims over the sides of her ribcage, she’s not overly ticklish but she flinches slightly when grazing feather light underneath the floating ribs.

Noting her reactions are quicker than usual, especially when he goes a little harsher with his teeth or his fingers sinking into her flesh, he dials back a bit and her skin prickles just the same with only tender strokes. 

Going back up to her neck, his mouth opens to leave a row of sloppy kisses up to her ear, “you’re doing so good, babe.” 

Not ready to beg yet, she lets out a long sigh, eyes fluttering open to stare at him. She’s been wanting to kiss him for a few minutes now and him denying that is quite the turn on as much as a frustration. He plays into that and baits her with his thumb stroking on her lower lip, tugging it down and running his thumb pad at the edge of her teeth. Her tongue swirls around it and he lets her lips wrap around it.

His hard-on strains the fabric of his boxers seeing her suck so delighted, he retrieves that thumb replacing it with his index and his middle, probing in and out as far as she lets him. 

“You just wanted something in your mouth, yeah?”

Humming around his fingers, her hips shift underneath him feeling the pull herself at her core.

“What? Got anything to say?”

Her head shakes and bares her teeth to bite over his second knuckle as revenge. She goes her way to lock eyes with him and play with her tongue diligently, same as she would do if it was his cock instead.

“Lick ‘em good for me, darlin’.”

She takes them deeper as he rubs himself against her underwear. He groans and ducks to hush in her ear, “you like that?”

Nodding, she focuses on his erection pulsating over her panties, wishing it was inside her. After a good long minute or two, she mumbles his name and her shoulder jumps slightly.

He takes his fingers out smearing some of her spit over her jaw and neck. “You alright?”

“My arm is cramping a bit like that.”

He releases her wrists, unfolds her bad arm gently to the side and massages her muscles before she tucks it comfortably closer to her body.

“Yeah, maybe we should hold the cuffs for a while.”

“Is that how you cuffed criminals, _Deputy_? Over their heads? We could always figure out another position.” She wipes her mouth with the back of her hand.

Scoffing, he pushes himself off her lap and pats the curve of her ass, “only the dirty ones like you, _Sergeant_.”

“Yeah, I bet you did.” She flicks her tongue.

Shane huffs running his palm over his bulge for a second before pushing on his knees and releasing her legs. Kneeling between them right after, he handles her hips to slide her panties off her. Then he separates and spreads her calves over his own thighs. Drawing a sly smile he grabs one of her hands and places it over her pussy.

“Touch yourself for me.”

“Shane.” She groans, showing her teeth quickly stopping herself from begging.

He bows to kiss her knee, smugly grinning, “You just have to say it.”

“Watch me.” She dares.

He nudges him a little with her heel as her fingers slide into her folds, already drenched and tender, she skims over her clit, fixing on the labia instead and circling around her entrance under his dark stare. As extra stimuli his hands don’t part from her legs, his fingers glide scraping her shins, circling at her knees and palming the back of her thigh.

Contemplating the option of pleading, Olivia breathes loudly watching one of his hands releasing and fisting his cock, as his other palm lingers on her butt. 

“Look how you got me. You sure you don’t wanna end it right now?”

Shaking her head, one of her fingers slides inside, then another one follows, curving and pressing on the roof. Controlling her moans, she urges her free hand to rub at her clit while he pumps himself at the same pace.

It’s Shane who gives up ultimately before any of them can orgasm, as much as he’d like to see her come by her own doing, he’d rather be the one who takes her there. He pats her ass twice and removes her hands off her to lower his body and settle between her.

“You know it was hurting you more than me, babe.” She grins, accepting her victory.

Huffing a small laugh out, he guides himself inside her and hooks an arm underneath her leg, bringing her knee up to his side. One of her hands is holding around his back, the other tucked between them resting on his collarbone. He can tell she’s already leaving marks with her nails after getting her all riled up like that.

“My god, you feel so good.” She gasps warmly on his neck as his hips start rocking hard on her slickness.

“_You_ feel so good, babe,” he breathes a half-groan on her lips without even touching them.

Pacing his thrusts smoothly, his fingers sink at the curve of her ass.

She tries to coax his jaw to tilt to her mouth but he keeps that going, still resisting to kiss her as his chin jerks to bury his face on her neck instead. Makes somewhat sad that he wouldn’t give into that already, her eyes almost tear up. It’s a little disconcerting how much she needs to taste his tongue while he fucks her, she tries to push that feeling but it lingers a tad bitterly on her throat. It goes out in a chocked moan as he aims to finish thrusting deep and sharp inside her. His cock twitches slightly and the grunts printed on her collarbone ripple down her body to wreck her instantly. She cries out his name breathlessly, knees clasping tight on his sides as her walls come down fluttering around him, stirring every spurt out. Straining, his hips jiggle involuntarily until every drop is out.

His broad back is slick under her fingertips that glide up and down as they heave. She clears her throat and runs her fingers at the back of his scalp, his short hair is damp in sweat. She blows some air at the curve of his neck giving him a nice chill. Shane smiles, lifting his head and bringing his hand to cup her face.

“Hey,” he kisses her nose and strokes her cheek. His voice is soft and ragged, “that was good, right?”

“Uh-hum.” She mumbles catching her breath.

“What? You don’t think it was?”

“What? No. It was good, babe.” She replies honestly but her face somehow tells differently.

“C’mon, what is it?”

“Nothing.”

“Did I hurt you?”

Breathing through her nose, she brings her voice down.

“No, I just felt, I don’t know… I wanted to kiss you and you didn’t let me and... I thought I was gonna cry and now I...” her fingers gesture at her eyes welling up, “-and I don’t know why. I’m sorry.”

“Hey, no, I’m so sorry, baby. I was just playin’ before.” He strokes her cheeks heating up and leans to kiss her mouth that draws sadly to the side. He pulls back, kissing her forehead instead.

“Fuck, I’m the stupid one, of course I wanted to kiss you. I’m real sorry, Liv.”

Swallowing, she sniffles and brings one hand to cover her eyes. “It's okay, Shane.”

“No, It ain’t right at all that I hurt you. You kick me harder on the leg next time, or in the head. Okay?”

She uncovers her eyes, huffing a light chuckle before hugging his torso. “Okay.”

Feeling like an asshole, his hands never leave her face as his fingers clear some stray tears mixed with sweat.

“Can I kiss you now?”

“Yeah.”

He bows licking his lips, his fingers thread on her hair as she swallows before his mouth crosses her lips. It’s most gentle and sweet, he takes his time spelling how much he loves her with his tongue tenderly playing with hers. Fuck, he did wanna kiss her, he berates himself for a little longer, maybe he took the game too far and failed to see that she was different today, he noted some of it during foreplay but didn’t thought it would make her cry.

He kisses her lower lip one more time before pulling back, shaking his head to himself, “are you alright?”

“I am now.”

“You sure?”

“I am, babe.”

“You would tell me if anything else bothered you?”

Nodding, “trust me, Shane. I love… listen, I loved everything you did, I just got emotional for a second. I think my hormones are still adjusting, that’s all.”

Hi face tilts, pausing, “I promise I’ll check with you more often, alright? I don’t wanna make you cry like that or let you feel like- like I don’t love you or something.”

“Stop. Look at me, I’m fine now.” She smiles genuinely to ease some of the guilt he seems to be spiraling into. “Would it make you feel better to bring me some water?”

“Is that a punishment?”

“No, I’m just parched.” She shrugs.

“Sure.” He breathes relieved, pressing his lips on her forehead before stepping out of the bed. “You need something else, baby?”

“See if there’s some juice left.” 

When he comes back with a couple of glasses she has rolled over to her stomach, leaning on her elbows with a pillow under her chest. She takes a long sip while he settles on his side drawing circles with his palm at the small of her back.

She catches him staring over her shoulder while she takes another swig, squinting funnily, “would you stop that? I’m okay, I promise.”

“I wasn’t...” He trails off, sliding the back of his hand from her shoulder to her hip, grazing the peak of her burn scar on the side of her thigh, “you’re just gorgeous like this, not just like this, all the time... incredibly smart and strong too.”

Olivia scoffs placing the almost empty glass on the nightstand and turns to him, pressing her mouth on his shoulder.

“I mean it- ain’t a line or anything.” His hand turns over, palm gliding lower and closer to the crook of her knee for a few seconds before following the same path up to her neck making her skin tingle and bloom gooseflesh. 

“You’re sweet,” her smile slides across his collarbone, “so incredibly strong and smart too.”

“Don’t mock me.” He mumbles amused, shifting to pepper her back with soft kisses.

Biting her lower lip, her head lowers touching the pillow, gathering her hair to the side and off her back to give him more access to all her skin. With a most pleasant shudder, she arches when his tongue sticks out in the middle of her spine. When he’s roaming between her shoulder blades she sends a hand to find his head to draw his lips up to her neck. His mouth opens to teeth on the spots that she likes, and she knows she’s getting herself into trouble again.

“Shane?” She hums.

“Yeah, baby.”

“You’re turning me on… I mean more than I already am.”

Facing her, his cheek rests on the pillow as his brow lifts. “You thought I was done with you?”

“No, but I need something more substantial than juice if you’re gonna do another two hours of foreplay.”

His laugh brushes her lips, “I promise I won’t. Want breakfast first?”

“No.” She pauses, spinning to her side and swinging a leg around his waist, “I want you first and then breakfast.”

His fingers trace between their bodies, over her mound and down to her opening, dipping his tips on her slickness, “you ain’t kiddin’.”

“Uh-uh.”

Her hips scoot lower to find his dick and grind against his half-erection. “Do _you_ need breakfast first?”

“Yeah, right,” he huffs, “give me a second… or a hand.”

Her palm glides down and her stare follows to see her hand gripping at his length, a thumb circles around the sensitive skin of his head, stroking long and hard until he’s fully grown again.

His mouth is pressed on her hair and he hums deep in his throat. She adjusts her hips closer, angling a little awkwardly for a moment. She’s already tender and lubricated from before but she rubs her clit with his hardness anyway for several seconds before sliding it inside.

Their bodies tie together like an intricate knot made out of skin- her leg bends over his waist as his thigh settles under her haunch, top hand grasping at her lower back, while his bottom arm curls under her neck. Hers is tucked under his armpit, palm resting and grasping at his shoulder blade as her bottom elbow is folded and squeezed between their bodies, not doing much other than tense and grasp at Shane’s chest when it feels like to.

“This is new,” says Shane rolling with shallow thrusts. “You good like that?”

The pressure on that angle feels awesome as he pushes inside her. Her breath hitches, “I’m so good, babe.”

Her hips wave with his moves, it’s languid and experimental at first as they get used to the new position. His fingers twine at the back of her locks, massaging her head. He pays more attention to her mouth this time, taking some of her air, his tongue slips inside just at the right moment as a moan rolls out of her tongue buzzing into his. It’s pineapple laced from the empty glass juice sitting on the nightstand. 

Her lips part at the corner of his mouth, and he growls deliciously sinking slowly into her.

“I love you so much.” She gasps between breaths, making his rhythm pick up.

“I love you, too.” He half-groans.

Suddenly, her mouth is back on his, fingers digging at his back as his grasp hardens on her hip to keep her steady. His thrusts grow desperate to finish taking her to climax for a second time before his release.

**

After all that activity, her stomach starts growling in the shower. Shane has left the apartment briefly to acquire what he needed for a mystery breakfast he's promised. She downs some more juice to ease the crave and dresses in fresh underwear and t-shirt, ending up falling asleep waiting for him.

She wakes up to the smell of cooking filling the whole place. Her eyes are drawn to a polaroid picture that he’s placed on the pillow next to her, it captures her face sleeping just as she was. She takes it with her following the delicious smell to the living room, where Shane is finishing putting everything in plates on the small island. There’s fruit, toast, eggs and hash browns.

“You took a picture of me?” She holds it up with a bit of a funny crease on her brow.

“Yeah, I borrowed one of the cameras goin’ around, figure we could put some up.”

“Well, not this one.” 

“Why not? You look pretty like that.”

Shrugging, she leaves it at the table and takes a seat on one of the stools at the island, dragging her plate in front of her and taking a fork out of Shane’s hand. Forgetting any manners, she cuts a piece of toast with her hand, and takes a forkful of her patty that is almost the same size as the plate, satiating her watering mouth fast she takes another two quickly, while Shane has settled on the stool next to her with his own plate of eggs and toast.

When they’re almost done there’s a knock on the door.

Shane opens to Noah, bearing a freshly baked loaf of bread.

“Not just any bread, cinnamon bread.” He indicates.

“Thanks, kid.” Shane places the tray on the countertop to join the rest of their little feast. “You want some breakfast?”

“Thank you but I’ve already eaten.” He waves off, “comes with an invitation though, my mom wants you two to come over for dinner sometime.”

Olivia scoffs pulling a knife out of the drawer to slice a piece of that bread, “knowing Mrs. Heylia, I bet it’s more of an order than an invitation.”

“Yeah.” Noah laughs, “I was tryin’ to put it nicely.”

“We can go later, yeah?” She nods at Shane, who agrees.

When Noah leaves, she holds the slice of bread up to Shane’s mouth. “You gotta try this.”

His mouth opens taking a good bite, breaking the swirled crumb and putting his thumb up immediately as the cinnamon melts on his tongue. 

Returning to their plates, Shane asks about the hash browns. She told him once that they were her favorite meal, while taking her last bites she shares that her grandma had a diner. They used to spend most of their time there when her father was at work.

“On weekends, she would let us have breakfast for dinner. I always ordered these. Sometimes waffles.”

“Your dad didn’t cook?”

“Oh no, he did, he just didn’t have time. Worked two jobs but he did what he could, you know?”

“He never married after your mom?”

Her head shakes drinking from her mug. “He dated but I don’t think he ever wanted to marry after that. Shit- first time he brought someone home, I was six or seven… God, she was a witch.”

“How’s so?” Shane cracks up.

“Well, she was a nice lady and all but uh, she got this thing for fixing me to be all _girly-girl_ and I hated it.”

“Aww, you don’t say? you weren’t all _girly-girl_ growing up?”

“I was, my own way I guess. But I… I mostly wore hand-me-downs from my brothers.”

“What did she make you wear?”

“She started putting me on these Sunday dresses and I hated them. Last time she tried, she brought this beautiful sky blue dress, had a duck on it...” She pauses to chuckle at the memory, “I took one of Max's markers and drew a poop under the ducky’s butt.”

Evoking the biggest laugh out Shane, she holds onto his arm to continue, “not only that, I also wrote _duck poop_ all over the skirt in big ass letters.”

“No shit. What’d she do?”

“Lost her mind, yelled at me, chased me all around the house, but I was faster hopping into my bike and bolting… when my dad came later, he found me hanging at the dinner, it wasn’t far from home, and he got all serious tellin’ me that I should be thankful for what I got. And I could tell he was trying so hard not to laugh… it didn’t last though, when he told that story years after he’d ended up cracking up much as everyone else.”

“Duck poop.” Shane huffs with a head shake, “so you were always gettin’ in trouble?”

“Not always.” Her head leans, “I was the fun one. Max was the smart one and Jesse was the quiet one.”

“You’re still fun.”

“I have my moments. Which one were you?” She nudges his side with her elbow.

He considers for a moment, “the dumb one probably.”

“I really doubt that.”

“You were saying ‘bout your dad bringing someone home… first time ma’ brought someone home I was 14. Had me young, told you back then. It was just us and my grandparents most of the time. Never saw her with anyone till then and I-”

“You lost it?”

“Kinda. I- I didn’t understand, like she was my mom, you know? I was a dumbass, never thought she could have feelings, let alone be with somebody else.”

“What happened?”

His brow creases, erasing the joy from a minute ago.

“Well... she brought him for dinner, and they were just laughing and cooking and I saw this other side of her that I never knew- and I couldn't stand her putting that much attention into him… I probably sound like an asshole but I...”

“No, it was your mom. You only saw her as that.”

“Yeah and I- I said the worst thing I could say to her.”

She’s almost afraid to ask, “what was it?”

“Call her a slut before storming out of the house.”

“Oh, babe, you didn’t.” She frowns loosely, resting her hand at his nape.

“I did. I fuckin’ did. Was the first time she got mad at me… I came back later. She was waitin’ for me and before I could open my mouth I saw her hand flying across my face and told me to go to my room. Didn’t speak to me for at least a week.”

“What did you do?” 

Shane shrugs, “Kept my head down, did my chores without her having to tell me, added some more to the list till she believed I was sorry… one day, she waited for me after school, we sat down and talked to me about her as Mia, not just my mom. Made me see that she had her own dreams and needs, you know? That she still wanted to fall in love and shit.”

“Did you use that word again?”

“Not a chance in hell. Felt her hand smacking me every time I even thought of it.”

“Good.” Her lip pulls softly. “I’m sorry that I made you sad.”

“You didn’t. I like talkin’ about her. That necklace you're wearing?” He finds the chain under her collar and pulls it out, “I told you she gave it to me, yeah?”

Olivia nods, bowing down to pick the 22 in her palm.

“I still feel you should be wearing it.”

“Uh-uh, that’s yours now. I like sein’ on you.” He leans closer to peck her mouth. “She wouldn’t mind.”

Her fingers fumble back to his nape to play with his short hair, “you’ve come really far, Shane Walsh. I’m really proud of you.”

Shane beams with a shy scoff, “yeah, right.”

“It’s true. Look around, everyone here adores you. _I_ adore you even more than them. And I'm sure she loved you more than anyone.”

“You think?”

“I don’t think. I know she did.”

**

In the afternoon, her legs tuck over his lap on the couch and her head is propped on two pillows near the armrest. Finally getting her shot at it, her eye is behind the camera after ten pictures, not fully developed laying on the table of either just her or the two of them together, she’s determined to get one good shot of him.

“Stop moving, Walsh.”

He hangs his head, watching his fingers absentmindedly rubbing circles on her shin.

“You’re cute when you’re nervous.”

“I’m not nervous.” His mouth puckers up in a most adorable smirk.

Waiting a long minute for him to relax, he smiles most bashfully biting his lower lip without even looking at the camera and she presses the button instantly to capture his profile. Nodding at her own achievement, she holds the photo proudly before leaving it on the coffee table with the rest of the others and the camera.

Then, her body bends to curl in his arms. She gives a little tug on his shirt noticing a couple scratches she left earlier on his collarbone and presses her lips on them. 

Her fingers scratch the stubble on his jaw. “Do you want me to shave this later?”

“I wasn’t planning on it but since we’re goin’ for dinner… yeah, if you wanna.” His arm extends to pick up a photo of the two of them already developed, showing it to her, “you like it?”

“I love it, you’re quite the photographer. Enid makes those clip holder thingies, I’m gonna ask for a couple so we can put some around.”

“I saw her earlier when I went out.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, she was leaving for class, walked with her for a bit and told me about the new turtle, Shelly.”

Olivia huffs a soundless laugh, “She’s a riot.”

Basking in lovingly their day off, Shane presses his nose to her hair, inhaling her scent as she closes her eyes ,soothing a palm on his neck. Just sitting in perfect silence for a while before they have to get ready for dinner.

Even if it’s nothing fancy, Mrs. Heylia, being one of the teachers and one solid member of the community, incredibly kind and generous to those who appreciate manners and make time to help others, deserves nothing less than. She often clashes with the Prescotts as well, especially the mother, Gemma, who’s always making excuses to get off her work duties. Heylia has her good eye on them, as she once told Olivia: _I don’t trust them one bit. Wait till you meet their younger chicken, a cocky little kid always chasing after the hens shaking the coop like he was a rooster._

She wouldn’t have to wait much longer. There is some ruckus outside with people cheering to a couple of cars revving outside and some chanting as Shane covers his face in shaving cream, he frowns half naked in front of the mirror as she dashes for the walkie to ask Tara, who informs the runners are back.

“Jesse?”

“Sorry, Olive. He’s not with them.” Tara laments on the other side of the walkie. “He’ll come back. He always does.”

Not completely reassuring but she trusts her friend’s word. She swallows with no answer as the walkie sounds off before hearing Tara’s voice again.

“Hey, listen. I have to talk to you. I know it’s your day off but can I come over after my shift?”

“Yeah, I- we’re having dinner with Heylia and Noah so I’ll see you after.”

“Ok, later.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t say no.” Her brow knits entering the bathroom as Shane sits on the edge of the tub.

“Hey, it’s fine.” He brushes off as she stands in front of him, wielding the razor, “we’re having a good day, right?”

Nodding at him, she’s focused on not cutting his skin accidentally as she starts with the shaving.

“So no dresses at all?” Shane asks when the razor is off his face.

“No, I’ve worn some dresses. Why’d you ask?”

“Cause of what you said earlier.”

“I did have some dresses, I just hated that she forced me into the most cutesy stuff. What is it to you, you don’t like what I wear?” She frowns showing him the blade she’s holding.

“How many times do I have to tell you how much I like your ass in those tight jeans. I love even better when you wear nothing.” Grinning, he palms her hips gripping for a tight squeeze on her ass.

Scoffing, her hand steadily slides the razor along his jaw.

“I was at this gala once with Holden, ” She recounts slowly, keenly fixed on the task.

“I was wearing this dress- this expensive gown that I bought for only one night, feeling like I was gonna trip on it, but I loved it. It’s ridiculous how much I loved it. I did my hair and makeup,” she pauses to rinse the razor, “-and he was so busy kissing his pals’ asses that he never looked at me. I was just a prop that night.”

“Still don’t get how you ended up with someone like him." He states. 

Guiding his face to tilt, she clears her throat, “I don’t know… I guess he was nice and kinda geeky when we met. We both liked to think ahead. Planned our whole life together. I know it doesn’t sound romantic but it’s what I needed and one day I didn’t fit in that plan anymore.”

Trying to stay still, he mutters between teeth, “What was the plan?”

“It doesn’t matter anymore.” Her shoulders raise leaving the razor on the sink and grabbing a towel to clear his face. “I realized that you can plan happiness or love.”

Shane lets that soak in while she makes sure his chin and jaw are smooth and free from hair. When she’s all done, kisses his nose and turns around to wash the razor and clean the sink.

Standing up his arms lock around her middle, pressing his chin at the crook of her neck, “guess you didn’t plan to end up with someone like me.”

Humming in negative, she washes her hands and turns off the faucet, leaning back into him.

“Are you happy with me?” Asks Shane.

“Very.”

“Bet you looked real pretty in that dress.”

“I was the belle of the ball.” She laughs turning around to face him, propping her butt on the edge of the basin. 

Using a finger to guide his face, she touches his lips with hers. His palms cup her face, taking control of the kiss and sliding into her mouth sweet and easy. When he pulls back, his thumb rubs on her jaw, and graces her lips quickly a couple more times. “I’d never stop lookin’ at you.”

She comically rolls her eyes. “Ok, that was a line. Admit it.”

“You just can’t take any compliments at all. I mean it. I’ll never stop lookin’ or kissin’ you, babe’.” He furrows shyly, serious wise, he’s true to his words and means no play other than loving her all.

“I’m just not used to it.” She confesses a little bashful, leaning her forehead on his brow.

“You better, cause I ain’t stoppin’.”

Olivia swallows and aims for a kiss, his fingers move to the back of her head as she dives wildly with her tongue. Her fingers glide between them and tuck underneath the waistband of his boxers, having him grinning slyly on her mouth.

“Please, help yourself, darlin’.”

Her teeth bare to nip and pull at his lower lip long before releasing it. Her fist curls around him, pumping till he’s hard. He takes a hold of her arms, releasing her hand from his dick and extending her elbows up to push the t-shirt off her. Roaming her whole torso free, he claims back her mouth hungrily and grunting as he lifts her ass to prop it on the edge of the sink. He presses between her legs as a sweet moan pleases the back of her throat.

Her arms are hooked around his neck as he grinds over her panties. He returns the favor and pushes the fabric to the side to soften her pussy. Blindly caressing her folds, his thumb circles around for her clit, bringing some of her juices out to his fingers.

“Fuck, Shane.” She parts and looks down at his hand, nails digging into his shoulders.

His gaze goes down with hers as two of his fingers dip inside her slickness, getting her gasping and tensing her legs. He licks his lips contemplating the idea of going down on her but he gives her the choice: his cock of his tongue.

“Your cock, I want you cock.” She urges, and he promptly yanks her panties down as well as his own underwear to fuck her in that same position.

Holding her legs apart and up to his waist, it’s her hand that guides his dick into her entrance as he groans loudly before even pushing. In the space between their torsos, her finger tips rake up and down his pecs and abs, obstructing partly his view of where their bodies meet. When his rhythm picks up, her breasts bounce and she has to use a hand to grip at the sink from slipping. 

“C’mere, darlin’.”

He eliminates that space and pulls her chest flush against him. His grip moves to her rear, leaving her legs to slack, while her arms snake around his middle and hold onto his shoulder blades.

She catches his mouth at times between moans. He pushes harder drawing her juices out to wrap heavily over his cock and her own thighs. The sounds of it all mixed with their skin meeting over and over and his own pleasure grunts echo almost too loud on the tiled walls. She’d be embarrassed if it didn’t feel as greatly as this, as he does it. Could lead her to come in seconds if she would just let go, but she consciously keeps her herself grounded till the need becomes bigger than the will.

“Shane,” she cries out, lips parted against his shoulder, her legs clasp on his hips.

He mumbles something under his breath with a growl. Keeping her steady, his fingers dig at the meat of her ass. His thrust becomes deeper and sharper until she comes undone in his arms. She holds onto him weary as he finishes, his shallow thrusts haste a few more times exhausting her body that goes limp the second his release hits her walls warmly. His hand falls at an arm's length to brace himself on the tiles behind her. Urging the other to keep her whole weight from slipping off the sink. She’s still trembling as he heaves, his cock twitches again inside her before pulling out carefully.

Her eyes flutter shut, almost out of focus and she presses her face on his collarbone.

“You alright, baby?”

“I’m awesome.” She smiles dizzy, out of his sight and in a high, “feel like I'm gonna fall.”

“I got ya.” Shane kisses her hair, keeping his balance and bringing his arm to wrap around her back. “See? Not falling.”

A muffled dog’s bark makes its way to their ears from the other side of the wall.

“You think someone heard us?” Olivia breathes low.

“Oh, someone has definitely heard you.” He chuckles.

He plays with the ends of her locks at the middle of her back, gathering them all those sticking to her skin and brushing them to one of her shoulders. Coming off the high her butt starts to hurt where it’s propped, and she slides carefully with his help. He keeps his hold around her while she stands.

“You wanna lay down for a bit?”

She considers for a few seconds, deciding against it to get a much needed shower instead before leaving.

**

In the evening, they have a most delightful dinner with Heylia and Noah, along with a couple of younger kids, siblings, she’s taken into foster care due to being on their own. When they are done with their food, Noah sits with them for story time. The 8 year old is reading with Noah looking over his shoulder, while he braids the little girl’s hair per her asking. Noah does his best but the little girl scrunches her nose and _ows_ a couple times. She’s most sleepy and about to crumble into the rug but keeps listening to her brother making funny voices and smiling.

The rest of the adults clean the table and drink a shot of bourbon Heylia has poured for each before doing dishes. Shane’s already rolling his sleeves before she can’t protest.

“It’s crazy that you found each other in this and then come to live here. Don’t you think?” Heylia asks.

Her mouth presses a smile, nodding. “It’s nuts.”

Then, she hushes to Olivia. “Is he treating you good?”

“Yeah, he’s a good one.” Olivia stares lovingly at his back.

“Then, why do you look so worried?” The woman observes wisely.

“Off the top of my head or in general.” Olivia offers, amused at her trying to read her.

“I knew there was something.”

“There’s nothing.” She brushes off. “What about you and that- that cute foreman of yours? Are you happy with him?

“Marcus? We’re just friends. Now, don’t try to change the subject. Tell me what it is or I’ll ask him.”

Olivia sighs, collecting her thoughts, she worries about many things, guessing that would reflect sometimes in her face. Above all, not that she has a list, but Jesse taking his time returning would be her best bet. Then, goes everything else. Tells Heylia as much.

“Now, stop worrying about Jesse, that boy knows how to take care of himself. Has anyone told you how much you two look alike?”

“Everyone thought we were twins when we were kids. He doesn’t like it here too much, does he?”

Heylia shakes her head lightly, with a troubled smile, “your father started sending him on missions, as he’d call them, just to give him something to do. He tries, he’s been trying to stay longer when he comes back, but he’s always on a new lead, going further and further. They had to stop him from going after you.”

“Nobody told me that. He wanted to?”

“Between you and me? I think he went rogue a couple times but came up with nothing.”

“Talk about a needle…”

“Ladies.” Shane interrupts after doing the dishes. “You havin’ a good time here?”

“We were, until now.” Heylia frowns amusedly at him, standing up, “it’s fine and time for these kids to go to bed.”

They say good night and off they go on a stroll around the neighborhood, almost completely bathed in darkness as the sun has set. A few lamps are on and the only people around are the guards on their towers, and some residents walking their dogs or going on jogs. 

Casually walking on the pavement, Shane’s arm hangs over her shoulders, as she tucks her hand under his shirt at his back. Quietly, they walk slowly under a most welcomed breeze that starts to bite colder than usual. 

The silence is interrupted by the loud ramblings and chanting of a drunk guy they don’t recognize by the entrance of the garage. It’s a young man, supposedly one of the runners that came back earlier. They’ve been hanging out and drinking for a couple of hours now as everyone clears the space for the night, he keeps running his mouth and calling names at the others for leaving. Kenny Prescott and his friend Mark are trying to handle him, with Miles watching them closely hoping the situation doesn’t escalate, by the look of his face when he sees them coming, he’s not too surprised by this behavior.

“C’mon, man. It’s dark already and you’ve had enough.” Miles snaps annoyed, blocking the way to the doors outside.

“Everything alright here?” Shane asks, stopping in front of the scene and letting go of Olivia.

Miles nods at them hesitating, “this is Daniel.”

“Prescott.” He mouths at them out of hearing range.

“We got this.” Kenny utters under his breath, getting a hold of his brother’s arm.

“Who’s the hottie?” Daniel slurs, scanning Olivia head to toe before spitting uncouthly on the ground.

“Watch it, kid.” Shane is quick to snarl.

“Get him inside, now! I’ve had enough of his shit for one day.” Miles orders exasperated.

Kenny and Mark almost have to drag him into the building. They watch them go before saying good night to Miles.

“Night guys.” Miles laments and goes back to his post on one of the towers.

“Like we needed another fuckin’ Prescott. Bunch of scumbags.” Shane mutters coldly, already ticked off by the re-addition to the compound.

“Too bad we don’t have a drunk tank.” Olivia adds, patting at the small of his back before tucking her hand where it was as they resume their walk.

He kisses her temple and throws his arm around her neck holding her closer to his shoulder to walk another lap and go back to their apartment.

**

As it’s been happening lately, they find their door unlocked for a third time. They blamed the first two times at their own carelessness but a third time is very unlikely to happen since they’ve been paying more attention to lock every time. This isn’t an oversight, someone has been definitely breaking in knowing exactly when they were out.

The key sliding roughly, gets stuck for a second before twisting it. It’s only the first sign of the lock being tampered with. Shane holds a flashlight, crouching to inspect the bolt. Noticing a few dents on the metal and concluding it’s been bumped, he stands up shutting the door behind him and throwing a hand to rub at the back of his head.

Olivia sits on the armrest of the couch, watching him pace around the living space, “what are you thinking?”

“Thinkin’ we should get a better lock.”

“I mean it’s not like they’re taking anything… are you worried?”

He stops to look at her, swallowing, “a lil, babe. I don’t care if they take everything, if they were at least we’d have the motive but.”

“But?”

“What if it’s some snoopin’ weirdo? You said you felt like someone was watching you the other day, right?”

“Yeah, but I feel that everyone is watching us right now, it could be in my head.”

“Liv. Don’t do that, don’t doubt yourself. I trust your gut better than mine and if there’s an asshole after you… messin’ with us or whatever, I ain't gonna take any chances.”

“So what’d we do?”

“I say we check everything, see if there’s something missing for starters. Figure out the rest later.”

“Okay.”

“Okay? You don’t sound too convinced.”

Turning a bit sulky. “I guess this is not how I wanted today to end."

“Me neither, babe.” He grabs her hand and lifts it to his mouth, “still, we did have a good day, right?”

“Yeah.”

They have roughly forty minutes before the lights have to go off to rummage through every nook, drawer and closet. Easy enough, since they don’t have too many possessions to begin with.

She changes into a pair of shorts and a tank top after going through the dresser where they keep their underwear and pj’s.

“You’ll have to check again cause I can’t remember everything you have, babe.” She tells him as he reaches for the duffel laying on the closet’s floor. “I’m missing a few socks, a sport bra, and a tank top but might be a laundry mix-up.”

“I know it’s a bother but at least we can cross this out of the list.” He breathes loud and weary.

“Should we talk to Max tomorrow?”

“Yeah, I think that’d be best. Maybe check other apartments, see there’s more break ins.”

Shane grabs his hidden wallet from the duffel that he’s been carrying since the beginning but hardly seen a couple times. He did use it to hide Olivia’s ID and dog tags after their run into the bounty hunters.

She starts placing the neat piles of clothes she just went through back into the dresser, observing Shane’s disconcerting huff from the corner of her eye, as his whole face changes unfolding his black leather wallet anxiously.

“What is it?”

“Your stuff is gone. The ID, your tags, I had ‘em here.” His voice is gruff, holding the wallet up to her. “I guess you didn’t take it by any chance.”

Olivia stops moving on the spot. 

Swallowing dryly, her head shakes, realizing the main reason someone would take those would be as proof that she’s here. Her train of thought goes off a hundred miles per hour as Shane’s is already fixed on finding the perp.

They get interrupted by a triple knock on the front door. They’re both quick to reach for their weapons, Shane’s on the nightstand and Liv’s on the dresser, before remembering Tara said she was coming by after her shift.

“Tara.” She sighs after staring at him for a few seconds as her grip loosens on the handle. “I’ll get it.”

Shane still follows closely with his handgun, not taking any chance as he said earlier.

**

All lights are already off as she paces nervously in front of them, under the faint light of the lamp on the table. Tara clearly doesn’t like being the bearer of bad news. More bad news. She waited till everyone was inside and it was completely dark for nobody to notice her.

“Max sent me… he wanted to tell you but he has the Prescotts after him like hawks.”

“What is it?”

She lowers her voice to inform them, “they're searching your apartment tomorrow, first thing.” 

“Un-fucking-believable. Here? They’re doin’ a search here?” Shane snaps.

Olivia holds her palm up, gesturing to lower his voice. “Why? why would they search our place?”

Tara locks eyes with her, “There some stuff missing from the infirmary and someone named you today, said they saw you a couple times alone.”

“Me?” she scowls, “I’ve not taken anything. What’s missing?”

“Prescription stuff, opioids mostly. The locked cabinet was cleared out.”

“You gotta be fuckin’ kiddin’ me.” Shane grunts. “And who’s this genius that saw her?”

“Rebbeca. Ben’s wife.”

“Shit, I’ve had enough with the Prescotts. Are you tellin’ me they waited for our day off to come up with this?”

“I didn’t take anything, you know that right?” Olivia’s eyes dart between the two of them.

“Of course,” Tara treasures and Shane nods, still fixed on finding what’s their play here.

“Max wanted to make sure that… you get the place _ready_ just in case.”

“Just in case? She didn’t take them and they’re not fuckin’ searching anything.”

“No, Shane it’s fine. Let them have it… they’re not gonna find it here anyway.”

“Wait…” it dawns on Shane, “this changes everything, whoever is breakin’ in is not to steal, they’ve planted something.”

“You guys had a break in?”

Olivia nods watching Shane grabbing two flashlights and handing one to her.

Staring at Tara, “you got yours?”

“Yeah.”

“What the hell are we doin’?” Olivia questions, turning her torch on.

“Search again, the three of us. Check every spot you think someone would hide something, tear down the fuckin’ pillows if you gotta.”

“This is fucking insane.” She finds herself saying opening the fridge and checking in the freezer, he said every spot after all.

Olivia goes through the kitchen and living room, moving stuff around, opening food containers, turning everything upside down while Tara focuses on the spare room and the air vents. 

Shane takes care of a second search in their bedroom with a different mindset, he thoroughly looks for anything that wasn’t there before. Then he moves to the bathroom. He takes off the lid of the toilet, moves everything around the cabinets underneath the sink and behind the mirror. Besides some aspirin, contraception and a bottle of painkillers they brought with them, there’s no other drugs to account for in there.

About to give up, his flashlight slides when placing the toilet lid back in place. Snatching the torch up, the light points at the ceiling.

Jumping to move the tiles from the drop ceiling after procuring a chair to do so. Olivia and Tara stand near him using their lights so he can search free handed. And right above the tub, the tile he moves next is just slightly heavier as he pushes it up and almost relieved that he’s hit the jackpot cause he was about to lose it. Sliding the tile to the side he grabs a paper bag filled with at least 30 of 40 bottles of pills and cases of anesthetics.

“Wow, were you planning a party and you didn’t invite me?” Tara quips with the bag in her hands now as Shane climbs down from the chair.

“That’s real funny, Chambler.”

Shane drags the chair back to the living room and they sit around to come up with a plan. Obviously, that bag has to be out by morning and even though it is late, some people are still up and guards are in place for a reason, and if they’re right, the Prescotts have more allies than they initially thought so, every move has to be really thought of.

“I’ll take ‘em.” Tara offers, “you two can’t leave until they come in the morning, it has to look like you didn’t know. Catch my drift?”

“You can’t do that, Tara.”

“It’s fine. I’ll take them to my place, when they come to search here, all the eyes will be on you. I’ll sneak to the infirmary, leave them in a box somewhere as it was misplaced for one of the doctors to find. Easy peasy.”

“Easy peasy, right.” Olivia shakes her head, not finding true comfort on her friend’s plan, “what happens then? They can’t get away with it.”

Shane states boldly, “they won’t. We tell Max they’ve been breakin’ in, get him to do a search on them… I mean someone stole your stuff.”

“One thing at a time.” Tara stands up and heads behind the kitchen island for something in the cupboards. Grabbing the biggest tupperware container she can find to carry the drugs, using a big bowled one she fits the bag almost perfectly, but she ends up grabbing another for the cases that were sticking out.

“What’s that for?”

“I came here for dinner,” Tara offers casually as she was giving a statement, “these are my leftovers.”

“Are you sure you wanna do this?” Olivia asks, helping her with the rest.

Tara nods as Shane stands from his place on the couch. “You radio the second you’re inside.”

“Are you worried about me, Walsh? That’s cute.”

Olivia makes a face at him, “that’s really cute.”

“And you two are trouble when you’re together,” he scoffs, “no, I’m serious. You better.”

“I will, don’t worry.”

After setting a code word in case somebody else is listening, Tara leaves the apartment and they listen behind the door for her footfalls to reach the staircase. They fade as she goes up, it only takes a minute for her to reach her own door.

“I love cinnamon bread.” Tara boosts on the radio as they agreed. It’d be a weird code if half the guys didn’t spend at least five minutes a day talking about food, so it’s just another day on Lakeview FM.

**

The dreaded bang on their door in the morning comes later than they expected. Acting as they didn’t know they were coming, Max enters first, leaving a group of three guards and almost the whole Prescott clan riling him up with smug faces all around behind the door.

“I don’t want this either, but you gotta play ball until- '' Max’s calm voice only angers Shane more.

“Until what? You have any idea what these people are up to?” He raises his voice for the others to hear, “she didn’t take anything, man… your own sister? Do you even have proof?”

“Look, I have to treat you like everyone else or we’ll lose everything,” her brother’s voice keeps getting lower, “let them hang themselves with this. Okay?”

“You know we’re gonna have a bigger problem, right? This doesn't end after this. You’re gonna have to make a choice, us or them.” She frowns roughly.

“It’s not that simple, Olive.”

“It is that simple, Max! nobody wants them here and they’re using this as a distraction just to get to you, you’re gonna let them do that?”

“I know, sis. I fucking know and as soon as people realize, they’d stop listening to them. I promise you that.”

“Promise. Right.” She rolls her eyes. “Let’s just go with it.” 

Max gave him a look at the beginning, letting them know that he’s with them, but the impromptu charade felt more real than they anticipated, which was great cause now the others believe they had no idea they were coming.

After the appropriate time, they step out, allowing three of the guards that have nothing to do with the Prescotts, as far as they know, to search the place. 

They wait out in the hallway barely feet away from the family. Shane gives him one of his killer looks to Kenny who seems very pleased with the whole situation. “What are you lookin’ at dumbass?”

Olivia places her palm on his stomach backing him up a little, muttering low, “cool it.”

In the middle of it, she catches Tara climbing down the stairs at the end of the hallway with Denise and Miles’ dog as nothing was happening. Denise is carrying the tupperware they set up last night. She was right, with all eyes on them they’re failing to see the drugs going back where they belong.

They hear a thud in the apartment and Max’s voice who’s only inside to watch. “Careful, this is not a raid guys, come on.”

It’s not that big of a place to search and they can tell at this point they’re going for a second sweep, listening to them saying “there’s nothing in here.”

“Hey, check again.” Kenny yells attempting to enter their places but one of the guards stops him on the threshold.

Turning her back on the others, a grin flashes her face as she mouths to Shane, “I wish Tara could see their faces.”

He suppresses his smile, but his eyes light up, “me too.”

After coming up empty handed, the guards leave for their posts and the Prescotts stand dumbfounded, and mostly disappointed that their stupid plan failed.

“Next time get a warrant, or a better witness for that matter.” Shane snarks.

“Asshole.” One of them mumbles as they part.

Thankfully they live in the opposite building, the whole family taking half of the first story. There’s always one of two of them on the lookout and claiming their space so sneaking there would be out of the question, especially now they’ve been burned. 

**

There is no victory in their actions. Someone still got to them, took personal items and planted drugs in their apartment. Shane’s main concern now is that first one, that someone might have gathered her identification and dog tags as proof that she’s here.  
Takes his time but he figures it out, like a light snapping bright over his head. The dents on the bolt were only there last night. If he’s right, coming to his own conclusion, those are two separate events, perp one took her stuff and perp two, aka the Prescotts planted the drugs. Who was the sloppy one to leave the evidence? still beats him but at least he can rely on his training and his gut. Mostly his gut or hers.

His lip worries on her skin, hugging her tightly in the living room after sharing his worries with her.

“I don’t want you alone here today. Come with me to the tower.”

“Shane. I think you already know I can handle myself.”

“Please.” He sways her faintly, pressing his mouth at the crook of her neck. “I know you can. I don’t want you too.”

Olivia takes a deep breath and pulls back cupping his jaw, “I’m gonna talk to Max first and I’ll join you after. Okay?”

Indulging his wishes, she does as she says. Goes talks to Max for the most part of an hour and then joins him in the scaffolding structure facing west along the main gate to the compound.

As soon as she finishes climbing the structure, her hand greets his butt, molding his new jeans perfectly, with a generous squeeze and playful pat before settling next to him, propping her forearms in the metal bar with her eyes set on the dirt road ahead, and the couple walkers meandering a few yards away by the trees.

“You like up here.” She states observing him on his element, having at hand everything he needs for the moment. A little metal holder is hanging on the bar with a thermos, a food container with some slices of that bread they had the previous day and two pieces of fruit. Aside are his binoculars, a box of ammo and his shotgun hanging on his shoulder.

“Yeah, it’s quiet most of the time.”

“I can see that.” She nods. “You know you can’t keep my eyes on my forever, right?”

“Watch me try, babe.” He glances at her before eyeing another stray walker getting closer to the walls and getting stuck to one of the spikes, “It’s a shame, the cleaning crew just cleared them out.”

“I guess he didn’t get the memo.” Her eyes fix on the rotter, growling way below from where they are for a few seconds before averting to him.

“I hate seeing ‘em like that too.” He shares, guessing pretty well that was in her mind too. “Been doin’ a lot of thinking up here, you know?”

“Yeah?”

Then he pauses, surprised, “funny, I thought you were gonna come up with one of your famous quips _‘you thinkin'? That’d be first.’_” 

Laughing softly, her hand reaches to his nape, “I’m tired, I don’t have it in me right now, babe. C’mon, tell what you’re thinking about.”

“Right. I- I keep seein’ them like that... knowing what we know, I don’t think there's gonna be a comeback from this. This is all that is left of the world.” His words sound a little morose for the bright light of the day and her fingers run on his hair.

“It’s just what it is.” He reiterates. “And this is a good place, a blessin’ in all this mess and I guess- when it comes to us of them, I choose us every time, Liv.”

“You’re not talking about our friend down there now, are you?” her head gestures at the walker.

“No. And I know I can’t keep my eyes on you 24/7 so help me god I’m gonna try, and if anyone even looks at you wrong-”

“Shhh, I know, babe.” She soothes placing her chin on his shoulder. “And I love you for that, but you said it yourself, this is a good place, and there’s some good people here.”

“That’s what I’m sayin’. We’ve both seen what’s out there, see, and not just them,” he points at the walker below, “there ain’t rules no more, not even here. At some point someone is gonna have to make a hard decision for all of us and if it has to be me… I’m not gonna hesitate, you gotta know that.”

She breathes on his neck, hoping that it doesn’t go that far, “if it comes to that, we’ll face it together, just like any other time.”

“Shit, you said you’re proud of me yesterday. How’s that for pride, me talkin’ about ending those dipshits.”

“I still am. You could easily hold that gun and end them right now but here you are, thinking about me and this place, trying to find away, that’s what I’m proud of.” She nudges him lightly to make a point. “You think I haven’t thought of that? Shit, I wanted to smash that kid’ skull on the pavement last night. But we both know that’d be a last resort, right? That's why you’re telling me, you’re trying to warn me to be prepared but babe, I’m the last person you need to warn.”

“Sometimes I forget that you’ve seen it at my worst. I don’t know what woulda been of me if you weren’t there that day, if I haven't met you.“

“Even at your worst, I never doubted your intentions were to do good. And- I guess you’d still be you, right? Even without me.”

“Well, I doubt that. I’m glad that I don’t get to find out.”

She’s getting to his tupperware, beaming, “may I?”

He nods and she helps herself to a slice of cinnamon bread, breaking it in half to give him the other.

“I don’t wanna find out what would’ve been of me if I haven’t found you either.” She shares between bites.

Having her there makes the morning shift more bearable.

An hour before the shift is over a rig comes across the horizon lifting a cloud of dirt on its wheels. It’s a semi-trailer, Shane observes with the binoculars as it comes closer.

“Incoming.” 

“That’s Jesse’s rig.” Mark says on the radio, “I need the backup team at the doors in three.”

Olivia yanks the binoculars out of his hands and watches the semi, almost a mile away she can’t make out his face until it gets closer. She can feel Shane’s hands on her waist keeping her from falling out of the structure as she pushes herself on the bars.

“No shit.” She utters, not truly aware that is real, that she’s about to hug her brother.

The team on standby arrives at the doors to make the transition easy and keep walkers at bay if it comes to that. Olivia has climbed down fastly before the doors are even opened. The truck has stopped at the front while the team works together to secure the heavy doors, and clear those few walkers roaming around. As soon as they give her the clear, she’s running towards the big vehicle.

Jesse watches her approach, as if she was a vision of someone else that is not really there. His features are sharp and it takes it a second to realize that she’s real and that she’s there waiting for him to come out, saying his name with tears on her face as she smiles below the driver’s window.

When he finally hops down the cabin he’s crumbling inside her arms, he’s taller than her, and even taller than Shane, and he curls into a ball like a little kid, hiding his own tears on her sleeve.

“You came back.” He mumbles ragged, “I thought, all this time…”

“I know, I know.” She soothes his hair that is loose and down to his jaw line. “JSS, right? I did. You did too.”

When he finally pulls back, he cups her face. “Your hair is longer.”

“Yours too.” She laughs.

“When did you… how…?” He tries to convey a million questions in a second and none of them comes out and tries to explain, “my radio broke a couple weeks ago, when I- when I was in range I couldn’t reach Max.”

“Later, okay? Let’s get you inside.” She says looking back at the guards waiting.

He signals to Pete, who takes care of getting the semi inside while he’s greeted by everyone in sight as they enter.

Shane is climbing down the tower in time to meet him as well, flashing a smile seeing them reunited.

“This is Shane, we got here together.”

They shake hands and Shane adds, “boyfriend, she has trouble sayin’ it. Welcome back, man.”

Jesse nods, still stunned at having his sister back. 

It’s quite a long afternoon of explaining how they got here, what’s been happening and Jesse recounting where he’s been all this time outside on his own. 

After an improvised family dinner with some of their friends they stay up late, just the two of them in her living room, playing cards and talking, using that time to tell him everything else. All the details no one else knows and what’s been happening lately.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Updated character list.](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ruCFmZnqA4waqhevIRXrTjL4JU1lg8VqS_zlw1Eo-WQ/edit?usp=sharing)
> 
> I couldn't even begin to explain or summarize this chapter in the notes cause I wouldn't make any justice to it, and I didn't want to ruin it with my babbling. I know it was a big one, the biggest one yet and one of my favorites. I hope you liked it too.
> 
> I've realized that I've been working on this fic for a little over a year, so if you've been here from the beginning or joined two days ago, thank you for reading!


End file.
